<p>our son has been admitted to both schools but can not decide. He is interested in science and engineering(Bowdoin has 3-2 program) .He likes the feel of a small campus like Bowdoin, but he is socially awkward and feels he will not make friends. The research opportunities at Cornell are amazing and he has been admitted to the engineering program, but he is afraid the school is too big and he will be lost. We as parents are trying to let him make his own decision and not influence him ,but he can't choose. This is agonizing for all of us. Anything anyone could say at this point we would appreciate,before we all lose our minds! Thanks in advance!!</p>
<p>This is a tough decision. On one hand, Bowdoin is a smaller, friendlier campus. But on the other hand if he doesn’t fit in with the prevailing social scene at Bowdoin, he could end up being pretty miserable.</p>
<p>My question is this: Even though your son is a bit awkward, does he have a ‘take charge’ personality when it comes to academics and his interests? If so, I think he would still flourish at Cornell; there are tons of introverted students at Cornell who do very well.</p>
<p>I think that 3-2 programs can be disruptive for many students. Even those who are more socially adept usually don’t find the idea of switching schools after their junior year appealing.</p>
<p>From that point of view, Cornell might be the better choice. With a little effort your son should be able to find compatible classmates, and then he’ll be able stay with them for the whole four years.</p>
<p>At least the weather isn’t a factor in his decision!</p>
<p>Remember the freshmen at Cornell are all housed on North Campus, which gives the first years more of a cohesive living community. </p>
<p>If he’s truly interested in engineering, it might make the most sense for him to be in a engineering program from day one? Cornell is a large school, but the size does mean there’s more niches for more people.</p>
<p>Good luck in your decision.</p>
<p>Thanks to all who have already replied! It makes more sense (on paper) for him to go to Cornell,as he is already admitted to the engineering school. We feel he is capable of handling the workload,but afraid he will have trouble asking for help. We are also afraid he will isolate himself socially, as this has been a pattern in high school. This is the fourth high school he has attended, because we have had to move around the country with my job. He has struggled socially and at the high school he will graduate from where he has been for a 2 years he has no friends outside the classroom. He has been to some preppy public high schools and did not fit in. This whole thing is just making me sick…</p>
<p>sammy…cornell is big on group work…</p>
<p>if he’s pretty brilliant then he shouldnt have a problem putting up with the group work…if he’s mediocre then he’ll struggle…</p>
<p>bowdoin might be an easier transition if he fears crowds…but if he wants engineering…</p>
<p>is he a computer person? i know the cornell hub is a niche for some :x</p>
<p>You know your son better than any of us (and if money is not an issue between the two), but I will say this:</p>
<ol>
<li><p>With all due respect to Bowdoin, which is a fine liberal arts school, Cornell is really a much more prestigious place, especially for engineering. Obviously, it is an Ivy, and it is a world class research university. It’s alumni networking is legendary, partially because it is a big school and because it generates tremendous loyalty from its students and graduates.</p></li>
<li><p>A smaller school is not necessarily going to be better socially for your son. Small schools can be claustrophobic. If he doesn’t make friends quickly, it is possible that the opportunities can get closed out, so to speak. I have two at Cornell, and one thing they LOVE about it is that on the one hand you develop a core of friends/acqaintances on your dorm floor, or in a club, or whatever, but you are always meeting new people. Also, it is big of course, but it is not like a state school with 20,000 to 30,000 undergraduates.</p></li>
</ol>
<p>The social issue really may be an issue that your son needs to address independent of the size of the school. I would hate to see your son pass up Cornell just because of its size.</p>
<p>But you know your son, that could very well be a key.</p>
<p>Good luck.</p>
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<p>I would be a bit worried about this at Bowdoin. It’s a pretty preppy place.</p>
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<p>I agree. Cornell has excellent psychological services offered on campus, and at only $10 a session, it’s a great resource.</p>
<p>Please read my posts regarding 3-2 programs here
<a href=“http://talk.collegeconfidential.com/oberlin-college/859076-engineering.html?[/url]”>http://talk.collegeconfidential.com/oberlin-college/859076-engineering.html?</a></p>
<p>My S is about to graduate from the COE at Cornell so I am biased, but I would strongly recommend that your S attend Cornell. IIRC, engineers account for approximately 20% of the entering freshman class, so from the moment they first set foot on campus, they have a significant group identity. Engineering students attend special math, chemistry and physics classes uniquely geared to prepare them for their engineering coursework, which begins sophomore year, and each freshman engineer also takes an intro to engineering class. As stated in the posts above, much of this coursework is team-based, so your S will be forced into working in groups, whether he is social or not. If you randomly search through various threads on this board, you can see that as a group, engineers are generally not known for being very social; so the chances are better that in a larger, more science and engineering-focused place like Cornell, your S will be able to find his social niche.<br>
Many years ago, our D was accepted to several Bowdoin-like LACs (ranked higher than the larger college she eventually attended) and after visiting and observing a few classes at these LACs, she couldnt get out of there fast enough. While I loved the environment and would have been happy for her to attend, she found the LAC environment stifling and too much like high school.</p>
<p>Speaking from the vantage point of a socially timid Cornell engineer who transferred out (and took two courses at Bowdoin in the interim), I say run, don’t walk to Bowdoin. The huge size is a problem if one is not aggressive about creating a social life for his/herself. The fact that you say he liked the small campus feel tells me that would feel much more comfortable at a liberal arts college. He doesn’t have to do the 3-2 program either; he can major in something like math or physics and then go to grad school in engineering. Which school is closer to home?</p>
<p>It’s not quite the same to major in physics and then go to grad school in engineering. You miss quite a lot that way, particularly if you want to practice as an engineer.
You will have to funnel yourself only in certain directions, due to gaps in your training, and the gaps may come back to haunt you later.</p>
<p>IMO the best plan if you want to be an engineer is to attend engineering school, from the outset.</p>
<p>signed:
physics major who went to grad school in engineering
(but at least I’d taken a decent number of engineering courses along the way during undergrad, yet still had gaps)</p>
<p>There are bigger and smaller engineering schools, but that’s not the choice at hand.</p>
<p>If OPs son is only peripherally interested in maybe being an engineer, or less, prefers a liberal arts curriculum, fits well with the prevailing campus culture at Bowdoin, then Bowdoin may be a great choice. However I have never heard its culture described as consisting of shy types, more like well-rounded preppies.</p>
<p>It’s surprising to me the choices some people wind up with, I would have thought someone considering Bowdoin would be agonizing about it vs. Middlebury,etc, and someone considering cornell’s engineering college would be debating it vs. CMU,etc, or one of the smaller engineering programs if small was attractive.</p>
<p>monydad, bowdoin’s culture consists of all types, including shy types. just because the default, knee-jerk stereotype on this board of bowdoin students rarely goes beyond “well-rounded preppies” doesn’t make it accurate. i was a shy, non-preppy kid at bowdoin and i was hardly the only one. you can’t fall through the cracks at bowdoin. but you can find people with similar interests. i think, for the OP, the decision comes down to exactly the tradeoff he/she mentioned: a good fit academic program with some social liabilities for her son or a good fit socially with some academic liabilities for her son. i won’t recommend a place because i’m not sure which is more likely to be better for her son. i do think a 3/2 program would be difficult, especially for a shy student. but what was the impetus to applying to bowdoin in the first place? how sold is the student on being an engineer without exception? in high school, we all have certain things we’re not willing to give up, but sometimes we’re willing to make some compromises. i’m not sure if a 3/2 program is too big a compromise or not. transferring from bowdoin to cornell is less difficult that the reverse. although i recognize the problem of having a core engineering program if your son starts at bowdoin. </p>
<p>which choice has he made?</p>
<p>congratulations on both schools.</p>
<p>D1s experience at a different, and larger, LAC leads me to conclude that it may not be sufficient to be part of a less represented minority personality type in such a small school, it is much better socially to be part of the predominant campus culture there. In that case, it can actually be a great experience, I imagine. It was not a great experience for D1, socially.</p>
<p>YMMV.</p>