Please, please stop saying "You can always go to [X] for grad school"

<p>Sorry, I was talking about Ph.D.s, not MD-JD-MBA in post 40</p>

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<p>No, we should tell them the truth – that there are more than 5, or 8, excellent universities in this country. Saying “but you can always go to HYPSM for grad school!” reinforces the stupid and unsophisticated obsession with those 5. It’s saying “You missed the brass ring this time around, kid – but don’t worry, try again for the brass ring a few years from now!” It just kicks the can down the road.</p>

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<p>Absolutely not; in real life, it’s never over until you give up trying – Grandma Moses became famous in her 90’s. However, a lot of students act like their life will be a failure if they don’t get admitted to their elite dream school. If that is what drives and frustrates them at the moment, why not remind them that they have a possible second chance down the road, should they choose to pursue it?</p>

<p>Chiming in late, but I agree with you 100%, psych_ (original poster).</p>

<p>Because it reinforces stupid notions, LI. </p>

<p>“Don’t worry you didn’t make homecoming queen in high school 
 You can always become one in college!” </p>

<p>“Don’t worry, you didn’t win the Powerball this time 
 You can always win it next year!”</p>

<p>It reinforces that these are “elevated,” golden schools that make or break lives. Which simply isn’t true.</p>

<p>It also may make an impressionable student believe a parent or the elusive “everyone” expects him to go to an Ivy for grad school now that he “failed” to make it there for undergrad. </p>

<p>And yes, it seems adults say this when encouraging a student to forgo the stronger and possibly more expensive school. The advice accompanies a claim along the lines of “No one cares where you get your undergrad degree.” In my kids’ experience, quite a few employers care. Also, my son is one who always said he was going to law school but then changed his mind by junior year of college. We were all shocked. He is so glad he went to the much better school because that is likely to be the ONLY college he will attend, despite what he thought at age 17.</p>

<p>ugh. </p>

<p>okay, stop saying “you can always go to X for grad school” but really, stop saying “where you go counts”. Talk about doom and gloom; high school students really don’t need that pressure on them, especially when the list of “acceptable” colleges barely numbers in the double digits.</p>

<p>Yes, employees take note when they see Harvard or Yale, but they don’t discount the state university graduate. For some employers, Ivies rub them the wrong way so sometimes Ivies help and sometimes, it hurts.</p>

<p>It’s up to the person to make what they can of their education and degree(s). The name is really just a name.</p>

<p>^Exactly. There’s also the reverse snobbery that occurs in places that revere their state flagships. I would for sure have had a better network in my area if I had graduated from ours instead of an “elite private” in a neighboring state. People tend to think not that graduates of fancy colleges are smarter, but that their parents must have been rich enough to send them there. And that in turn can fuel their belief that people who accomplish their goals through their own effort and not through advantages of birth are somehow more worthy.</p>

<p>Sometimes it counts and sometimes it doesn’t. Either way, the person making the comments is unlikely to know whether it will or won’t matter for that particular student and should refrain from opining. Furthermore, there is a difference between attending Slippery Rock State College and attending Penn State. The problem is that sometimes top students get the best money offers from the lowest ranked schools on their list, so the choice ends up not being between Harvard and UNC Chapel Hill, but maybe between Harvard and Eastern Carolina.</p>

<p>My D got into H and S, but her best financial offer came from Univ of Miami, and she didn’t even apply there. There were plenty of people who thought she was foolish to turn down a full ride.</p>

<p>I usually see this in the context of cost, not admissions results. And that REALLY misses the point. I understand the push back of there not being one (or one group of) school(s) for u/g work, but the false equivalence that the OP is pointing out is very damaging. The best u/g fit is UNLIKELY to be the best graduate fit. </p>

<p>Even if we’re merely talking about prestige, u/g, professional schools (medicine, law, business) and graduate schools (PhD programs) are completely different and there’s no real comparison. So “we’re saving all of our money for an Ivy grad school” is missing the point. An Ivy may not be prestigious in any given field, and the notion of saving money may be silly, particularly for PhD programs, since many, many PhD students are funded.</p>

<p>(I suspect that in these conversations people don’t mean “grad school” in any event. They mean professional school, where there’s little to no funding. That’s a world of difference.</p>

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<p>Really? And you base this on what? One of the most successful people I know graduated from Slippery Rock. He is now a senior VP of a multinational corporation, and he never got an advanced degree after his undergrad.</p>

<p>I also know people who have become hugely successful armed with their degrees from UW-Eau Claire–one is running a multi-billion-dollar foundation and the other is president of a profitable tech company that’s about to go public.</p>

<p>The point is, you can’t say definitively that there is a difference for most people in most careers. As others have said, it has much more to do with the individual than it does his or her academic pedigree.</p>

<p>^And nothing about their success negates that fact that there is a difference between those state school experiences. Furthermore, the people currently running large businesses and organizations likely went to school 20-30 years ago, when almost everyone stayed local and just earning a degree practically guaranteed you a job. That is no longer the case.</p>

<p>I think it’s simply a way of saying “You are not bound forever by your grade in 9th grade geometry.”</p>

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<p>Of the examples I used above, only one is “local” (but yes, they graduated 20-30 years ago). And “just earning a degree” may have been enough to guarantee a first job, but not to guarantee the kind of career trajectory these people (or many others) have had. I work with a lot of talented people in their 20s and 30s and it’s pretty clear which ones are going to go the farthest in their careers. Quite honestly, I don’t know where most of them went to school but I can assure you the majority went to state flagships or directionals. Also, at the risk of stating the obvious, there are “minions” with degrees from every imaginable school, including the ones most valued on CC.</p>

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<p>That’s a chicken-and-egg question. It wouldn’t surprise me that graduates of elite schools tend to interview for and / or cluster in occupations where employers value elite school degrees highly. So of course their experience will tell them – gosh, employers value elite school degrees – all the junior people in my industry are all like me, graduates of elite schools. </p>

<p>Likewise, graduates of “average” (you all know what I mean) schools may tend to interview for and / or cluster in occupations where employers don’t really care all that much about elite schools (and might even potentially ding them for being uppity, etc.). So their experience will tell them elsewise, too. </p>

<p>And both sides are correct.</p>

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<p>(Perplexed) How would they have known, and why are they making these comments to you about her perceived foolishness? Waaaay too much involvement in other people’s business.</p>

<p>Well, I don’t want this to turn into another one of those threads, but these are the kind of ads I sometimes see: </p>

<p>"Job Title:
TOP SCHOOL, SUPERB GPA - RISK ANALYST </p>

<p>Job Description:
Job ID(20121) Must be from a top school - Cornell, Harvard, M.I.T, Stanford or similar with a minimum 3.8 GPA. Prestigious Investment Management firm located in Midtown
"</p>

<p>And here is the list of campus visit places for a small firm in Chicago, taken directly from their website (so this is a company NOT in the allegedly snobby NE)
 Not a shabby school among them, and no state schools either:</p>

<p>"University of Southern California</p>

<p>Duke University</p>

<p>Carnegie Mellon University</p>

<p>Cornell University</p>

<p>Columbia University</p>

<p>University of Pennsylvania</p>

<p>Boston College</p>

<p>Massachusetts Institute of Technology</p>

<p>Northwestern University</p>

<p>University of Chicago</p>

<p>Stanford University"</p>

<p>Note: their current staff are graduates of a mixture of schools, yet this is where they are recruiting.</p>

<p>The point is that people should keep their opinions about schools to themselves because we all have different financial situations, different educational desires, different career goals, different geographical perspectives etc. and this school business gets people really worked up. They seem to take school rankings very personally, and believe people think their student is somehow less intelligent or whatever based on the school s/he attends. That is bunk. But that doesn’t mean all schools are created equal.</p>

<p>TheGFG, so?? No one has said that there aren’t industries / companies where they only recruit at a handful of certain top schools with certain GPA requirements. Of course those exist. There are also plenty of industries / companies where they go to other schools and couldn’t care less about elite schools. This isn’t an “either/or.” This is a “yes, and.” </p>

<p>I don’t think you truly understand that there are kids graduating from Northern Illinois who get some pretty nice jobs with good starting salaries right out of Northern Illinois. Now, that’s not compelling enough for me to send my kid to Northern Illinois, but why act as though the kid can never be employed, under some notion that the only employers out there care about elite schools?</p>

<p>It is very odd and bizarre to me how so many people on CC seem to think that the only worthwhile employment is in NYC on Wall Street in banking / investment firms. It’s almost as though you guys aren’t even aware that there is industry elsewhere.</p>

<p>I agree that the phrase can have a benign use, but also agree that it is pernicious when used to suggest that it isn’t “worth it” to attend a more selective school for undergrad.</p>

<p>By the way, even if I personally know a person from South Backwoods College who is a huge success, and a person from Princeton who is a failure, that doesn’t mean that those schools are equal.</p>

<p>I totally agree that people should keep their opinions about individual schools and the general effect on high school students’ future to themselves.</p>

<p>I am also baffled that CC always drags out Wall Street as proof that school pedigree matters in the general career/job search. One industry!
No one is saying all schools are equal but going to a non-top 12 or (gasp!) a state university isn’t going to doom a person to mediocrity; likewise, going to an Ivy doesn’t confer special powers to its graduates.</p>