My kids go to a small, rigorous, highly-regarded private school. In my experience the counselors put a ton of energy in helping the kids in the lower two thirds of the class, regardless of who the parents are. Whether the parents listen to their advice is a different issue.
The kids at the top are so strong and self-directed they don’t need the help (and likely wouldn’t need it if they were at a public school either).
My nephew went to a high school that everyone here has heard of. His mother felt that the rich kids got better treatment than her son. From what I could tell she was being a bit paranoid. But I do think private schools often to make sure everyone has good results and they may discourage too many kids from applying to the same colleges and favor those who are a legacy at a particular college. In the end she found about Rice through her dentist not the GCs, they got a great package and her son did spectacularly there, so it all turned out more than fine. I think there’s so much noise in the process that it’s really hard to tell. But JHS’s experience jive with what I heard from her.
I do think GCs want everyone to be happy, so they may try to lower expectations for some students so they aren’t looking at a pile of rejections in April. Is that them being realistic knowing what the colleges are likely to do? Or is them not being fair to all their students? It’s hard to tell.
I think the rich kids certainly have an easier time getting into the school, but come college time, it is in the school’s best interest to do their best for every child. Everyone judges a school by the college acceptances.