<p>"Secret Asian Man" : That is the funniest, and best "handle" I've seen yet on CC, congrats !!</p>
<p>monydad, a teenage boy missing his girlfriend thinks nothing of driving 2-4 hours to visit. Mind you, we weren't trying to 'break them up.' That's their personal business...we just wanted to be sure that when we pay big dollars, he is getting the most out of his educational experience which includes the experience of being sufficiently invested in his new life, rather than clinging to high school and the ease of family life.</p>
<p>That said, every kid, and every family is different: Some kids can achieve that level of independence closer to home. And sometimes there are higher priorities.</p>
<p>I’m dealing with this issue (son doesn’t want to go 150 miles away to residential LAC; instead wants to commute to local LAC 10 minutes away from home) & I agree that being in residential/away-college is part of growing up/independence, but son doesn’t think this way. All things being equal, should I negotiate with son (he’s Senior in HS with 1 semester to finish) to go to LAC 150 miles away for 1 semester then if doesn’t work out, he can do “Plan B” (attend local LAC/2nd choice)? Also local LAC doesn’t have same excellence/academics compared to attending Wabash (excellent all around)! Should I gently push son out of nest?</p>
<p>Downside of far away: once you graduate and go back home, you will not have any of your college friends nearby, you will hardly ever visit your college again</p>
<p>Upside of close by: your parents and family can come to your college events (concerts, plays, sports games, etc.)</p>
<p>^^nyquist: unless your kid’s school (like the original OP’s) has a large population of kids from their home state and region…!!</p>
<p>250 miles (more or less) is near the outer limits of how far you can comfortably travel round trip in a minivan/wagon/SUV to schlep your kid’s stuff to campus and return home with the unloaded vehicle in a single day. </p>
<p>500 miles (more or less) is near the outer limits of how far I’d want any kid to drive in a single day. Much farther, and it may take an overnight stop. This not only adds cost, but you also have to worry about leaving a vehicle loaded full of stuff at the resting place.</p>
<p>However, if you’re going to fly anyway, there isn’t that much difference between flying 700 miles (Baltimore to Chicago) or flying 1700 mi. (Baltimore to Denver). Even though it’s about 1000 mi farther away, you still go through the same sequence of steps and you still complete the trip easily in a single day. You don’t add hotel expenses by adding 1000 miles. </p>
<p>Then again, if you are going to fly to a point that is any significant distance into the hinterlands from a major regional hub, you’ll probably have to change planes (or add a bus/train leg). This adds cost, time, and complexity to the trip.</p>
<p>Son #1 is about 23 hrs drive (NY to Miami).
Easy access by plane. We visit once a semester because it is a great place to visit with things for us to do without him having to entertain us. Easy flight home for him is the key (and not too costly.)</p>
<p>Son#2 is 8 hrs by car. (NY to Buffalo).
Easy access by plane. He does not want us to visit as he says he is too busy. I think he’s worried there will not be much for us to do and we’d expect him to entertain us. Again, easy flights home.</p>
<p>With cell phone, etc it is so easy to stay in touch. If my kids were 3 or 4 hrs away I would love to see them, but know they should have their life at school and not come home often anyway.</p>
<p>Distance is not such a big deal as long as they are not too far from an airport, and you too.</p>