I agree that Andover has MANY private Day school nearby vs Exeter. There are 16 day students from DC’s graduating class alone. Plus there are many other schools where day students get admitted.
I’ve heard of the local “feeder school(s)” of Andover. It sounds like your child’s school is (the) one. @momof3swimmers. And I tend to think that the proportion of of kids coming from private schools makes the school culture preppier
Where I live, the public schools are generally good. Many families who start there have no desire to change. They aren’t considering private day, and BS isn’t on their radar. At the same time, there are a number of private schools (k-8) and few of the parents who send their children there return them to the public system for high school. Many of these kids in our area will be day students at BS (L’ville, peddie, hun, solebury, George) as well as at very good day schools. Of course, some will go away to BS because they’re familiar with the concept and the schools.
I am inclined to think that this is more about the applicant pool than the schools. Remember too that the cost of BS is very high - and it seems more so to someone who hasn’t been paying any tuition through middle school.
The wifi where I am is not stable, causing a botched up post above. I meant to ask if posters agree that a majority of kids hailing from private schools directly contributes to the preppy feel of a school.
@gardenstategal I agree that composition of the student body may have more to do with the applicant pool. But it could also be related to the backgrounds of those who can pay.
I didn’t get an overly preppy vibe at Andover from our visits but I chalked that up to the casual dress code more than anything. I definitely feel like dress code can influence the degree of preppiness. However, some schools are definitely more Vineyard Vines/Lilly Pulitzer than others, regardless of the dress code. Deerfield strikes me as very preppy. I wonder what its private/public breakdown is. I’d guess fairly high from private.
I’d say Andover may be at least somewhat preppier than it appears to be to casual visitors, probably due to its dress code as @doschicos said. Before coming to Andover, my son was your typical suburban middle class kid, casual inside and out and a bit naive too. We witnessed his pretty drastic changes in appearance and sophistication through his years in Andover. He was definitely a lot “preppier” by the time he graduated. 
And I do expect Deerfield and SPS to be more so.
I think, as is the case for colleges, that students are attracted to schools where they feel like they’ll be comfortable. Preppy kids tend to be attracted to preppy school, artsy kids tend to be attracted to artsy schools. My kids went to the same private elem/MS, yet they ended up at private high schools at the opposite ends of the preppiness scale. Both high schools had a lot of kids from private middle schools. Remember that Princeton Day School and the Waldorf School are both private schools.
I think the best way to judge these school is not by looking at stats, but by visiting the schools and talking to students and parents.
@Sue22 I think it’s a two way street. All students attending a school cannot be preppy or otherwise. Those that make the “mainstream” inevitably affect others, especially considering these kids are at such impressionable ages. On the one hand I would like to see a true diversity where no one is pressured to conform. On the other, I don’t think that expectation is always realistic. As long as there is a reasonable balance, kids learn, adjust and pick up what they can, they want or they should. All is good.
My experience, at least at SPS, is that if a kid has self-confident and blazes his/her own trail and style, students respect that. Find 14,15, 16 year olds that are independent enough to be that way is the challenge. I guess its a chicken and egg thing and certainly not limited to boarding schools by any means. My kids felt that there was less stereotyping and cliques at boarding school than public school. Living together breeds familiarity which helps transcend preconceived notions. I’ve also found that some students, as they age, will become more willing to embrace their own style/persona as juniors and seniors.
I also think that because most boarding schools are relatively small a lot of kids become generalists-they may be a star hockey player but they’re also on the student newspaper or in the a cappella group, or they’re a tour guide or proctor or student rep. In my experience this is harder to do at a large public high school where kids tend to have to be better at something to get a spot. I think it breaks down the barriers a bit in that it’s a little harder for kids to be seen as unidimensional.
(By the above I do not mean to imply that PS students are unidimensional or that they can’t take on multiple roles. The large number of spots on teams or EC’s and the limited number of kids to fill them make it necessary at most BS’s for kids to fill more than one slot.)
@GoatMama , It’s been a dog’s age since I saw someone online remember that “data” is plural. Keep fighting the good fight.
@doschicos My son was far, far from “has self-confident and blazes his/her own trail and style” when he started BS as one of the youngest in his class. He was just naturally kind and somewhat naive, pretty much a “clean slate” with potentials. Overall, I am glad about the influence he got from his peers, the positives heavily overweighing the negatives (and I don’t consider becoming “preppier” a negative either).
No, preppier isn’t a negative, if that’s who one wants to be. Some arrive that way, some wear it to the max and that’s who they are, some adopt it and it fits them, some try it out and abandon it, some just do their own thing. It’s all good.
@panpacific I do think it is incredibly rare for any student starting high school to possess self-awareness. What I love about teenagers is the transformation that takes place over the years as they develop that and find their own voice and interests. That isn’t unique to boarding school students but I do think that many BS students, due to the independence they garner and the close relationships they develop with many adults by living in community, do graduate with a remarkable degree of poise.
Welcome to the scientific peer review group, @twinsmama! 
Data is plural?
Datum and data.
See, if your kids took those Latin classes instead of the modern languages that I recommended…oops, wrong thread. 
Stratum and strata
Bacterium and bacteria
Criterion and criteria
Medium and media
Phenomenon and phenomena
While I did know that, saying “Where are the data?” just sounds weird to my foreign ears, even though the AP style book says this is generally correct. I just avoid this by saying “Where can one find the data?” 
<3