I think the reason these threads get so emotional is that every parent wants to do the “right” thing for their kid. It is important to recognize that all kids and families have different needs, different desires, different values, different emphases. And that’s okay!
It does not invalidate one family’s choice if another family makes a different choice!
For me, the return on investment is that my kid will have a wonderful four years of intellectual exploration and stimulation. That’s what I always wanted for him. How much he earns afterwards is not important to me; I hope he will be happily fulfilled in whatever career he chooses for himself and in his life overall, and that the time he spent in college honing his thinking and writing and exploring ideas will help him to live a more intellectually satisfying life.
But that does not mean that other families should all think like my family members do!
Not everyone will define ROI in terms of financial gain, which is fine. And for those that do, a child’s individual personality and ambition may shape their future earnings even more than the college attended.
Ultimately, if you listen to your child and consider how to help your child attain a college education that matches their wishes and needs and personality, there are many excellent choices and no single “right” choice.