<p>We’re telling our kids that we’ll pay the cost of our state flagship (UIUC) for whatever major they choose. For the major DD1 is likely to choose, that’s currently about $26,500 for tuition, fees, room and board (not including personal expenses, books, travel, etc.), and likely to go up over the next few years. I think that gives her a lot of options. Our state flagship is quite expensive relative to some, and a decent merit award at many private colleges will bring her down to that amount. We chose this approach because we can afford this amount, we know our kids can get a good education at UIUC and if they want something else, they can do a cost benefit analysis and decide if it’s worth it to them.</p>
<p>I so appreciate everyone’s answers to this post. </p>
<p>Graduating debt-free - what an accomplishment. Something to work towards. </p>
<p>In this whole college path experience, there are so many unknown elements. And there’s only so much estimating one can do… eventually there will be something concrete, like a financial aid letter, to clarify the image of the future, but until then… it’s part guessing game, part thoughtful musing, part planning, and even part three-card-monty!</p>
<p>Hearing how other families - those like mine and those different from mine - helps me find my own parameters and possibilities. </p>
<p>I’d love to hear more! </p>
<p>Thanks to everyone!</p>
<p>I knew from an early age that my parents were giving me no money for college, and since I was the youngest of a large family, I didn’t qualify for need based aid. I worked summers and through my last 2 years of high school to save enough money to pay for my first year college expenses that my scholarships didn’t cover. (I had very few EC’s!) My mistake was in not taking out a loan that year, as Reagan got into office then and changed the subsidized loan rules, making me ineligible. Sophomore year I had to live at home and commute due to lack of funds. Then I started the co-op program and was able to pay for my last 2 years, finally becoming independent and eligible for a loan my 5th year. It was a long haul and I decided I would not do the same to my kids. My kids are fortunate to have grandparents (on their father’s side) who are able and willing to help with their college expenses.</p>
<p>//that’s currently about $26,500 for tuition, fees, room and board//</p>
<p>Yikes. That’s in-state? Hoo boy.</p>
<p>Depends on the kid. For my older son, we took the cost of a private university - about $51,000 a year - and multiplied it by four. He’s worked hard enough to be a HYPS contender; he deserves it. As I’ve said to him: If you can get into Stanford the least I can do is pay for it.</p>
<p>We love our younger son just as much but he is not quite as interested in academics. So we’ll see where we are in a few years. For him as of now there’s also a simple formula. Zero times four equals zero. But that might be changing. We actually got an email from him at camp today saying he’s almost done with the book he brought, could we sent him another? That’s a first, so if the trend continues, we’ll use the first formula for him too.</p>
<p>edit…</p>
<p>I think it is a little hard not to be results-oriented when doing the computation-- I want do X, now can I? Two families in identical financial situations could have very different views about what should be the family’s role in financing college. And even if they have similar views about what they should or would like to do, they will have different answers about what makes sense. Heck, these differences aren’t only between families but within families.</p>
<p>So, start with a couple questions. Do you see yourself helping with college or paying for college? Helping might mean letting the kid live at home while he pays his own tuition, fees, books. It might mean a gift not necessarily intended to cover costs or meet need. It might mean loans.<br>
If you want to pay for college, what does that mean to you-- in-state at a public university, enough for a highly-regarded public OOS, full freight at dream school? Do you expect your child cover some even if you could pay for all? </p>
<p>Try to be sure both (all) parents are on the same sheet philosophically. Or at least on a path that takes them to the same vicinity.</p>
<p>Then budget. What is set aside? Are you willing to contribute more than what is set aide? What other financial goals do you have? Where will the money come from each year? How will you retire? Where are the gaps? How do you feel about borrowing? (I don’t like the idea of me borrowing for kids’ college-- they get the benefit and have a lifetime of earnings ahead-- but borrowing might make more sense than liquidating certain assets.) A financial planner might help.</p>
<p>I think some people would call my approach backwards. But I think you need context for the numbers. </p>
<p>I have to acknowledge that I write this from the perspective of someone pretty comfortably in the middle class. </p>
<p>About the EFC. I was pleasantly surprised the first time I used the College Board calculator-- it was about what we expected to pay FOR FOUR YEARS! Ha ha. The good thing is that it got me thinking about what it would really cost to do what I wanted and what I actually could do.</p>
<p>my parents number is Zero
i will pay for everything…including the apps</p>
<p>Most people would not make our choices. Shrug.</p>
<p>We married relatively late, had moderate incomes in a high expense area for many years, and had virtually zilch saved. You either save or you borrow…we understand that.</p>
<p>D got some merit aid, worked a few hours/week through college, and got some non-merit aid as well…not tons, but it made a dent. She took loans, thus giving her some skin in the game, but not an excessive amount. Not having saved, we took PLUS loans in an amount that would make some people stagger. </p>
<p>With the financial aid, D’s college cost only about 10 percent or so more than a UC would have, assuming she didn’t get a UC Regent’s scholarship or some such…which may have been in reach had she applied to a UC, karma.</p>
<p>Her attitude and potential were such that we would put ourselves through some pain to afford the college she went to. With economy heading south, lol, we got it…I really could do without that fourth year of loans but in any event, her college performance vindicated our decision and we’d do it again. It comes down to: which would I rather have, a very healthy car payment or D’s undergrad degree? And if D’s eventual inheritance is slightly diminished, I think she’d rather have the degree up front. </p>
<p>I don’t lose any sleep over any of it. Am a lot more concerned with keeping afloat over the next couple of years, next to which the educational loan payments are relatively trivial.</p>
<p>I should add, we have only one child, so that made it easier. Also, the potential of this one was such that it made it an easy decision. I know of other high school students behind whom I would not have been willing to plunk down such a substantial investment quite so readily were they ours.</p>
<p>I think if you are a parent taking out (or co-signing) loans for your child you have to be willing to ask yourself a few questions and give yourself honest answers:</p>
<ol>
<li> How am I going to feel about this loan if s/he flunks out?</li>
<li> How am I going to feel about this loan if s/he drops out?</li>
<li> How am I going to feel about this loan if s/he scrapes by and can’t get a job or into grad school when s/he finishes college?</li>
</ol>
<p>You can’t plan for every path taken, but these are some obvious things that can happen. All these things would be upsetting even without the debt, but with the debt – wow.</p>
<p>College provides other things beside jobs. I am absolutely convinced that Barnard has played a big role in shaping the direction, context, and texture of my D’s life. Yes, she is having some difficulties finding a job that will support her working in NYC; so are many others. However, this situation will ultimately change. The person she has become probably will not. And I am so pleased for her and pleased to see the woman she is.</p>
<p>So, even without the reinforcement of the job or law school acceptance (she wanted a gap year) that would validate our decisions, I am quite satisfied with the choices I have made.</p>
<p>The jury is out on my S. He is earning equal grades as his sister did at an even more demanding college, but he seems a bit lost as to direction. However, I think his situation would be worse at a large public university. He just has growing up to do and two more years to do it. He switched his major from Music to Classics, something he would not be able to do at the publics in our state because only one has a Classics Department and it’s not one that has a good music department.</p>
<p>Absolutely, college provides things besides jobs. In fact, you could probably argue that if your child’s only goal is employment that college (particularly a 4-year residential one) is not a very efficient way to go about it.</p>
<p>But in our family, we expect our kids to have a viable career path when they finish. That isn’t to say that the career path won’t change or that graduate school might not be the next logical step, just that there has to be a path. For instance, if one of our kids wanted to be a counselor or social worker or had the grades to go to law school, I’d have no problem with the degree in psychology. But I’ve seen too many kids – including an old boyfriend of mine (and I mean old in the sense of both former and aged!) – who ended up with a psychology degree and floundered career-wise with no plan. That doesn’t mean that there is no intrinsic value is a psychology degree, just that you have to think about how you are going to support yourself.</p>
<p>Well, in an ideal world, I agree with you. It doesn’t always work out that way, demand as we might.</p>
<p>I followed the opposite route – no career goals at all. Just loved to read books. Fell into an English major, did extremely well, fell into graduate school because I didn’t want to stop reading.</p>
<p>Am now a tenured English professor. Never part of my plan.</p>
<p>My H has a degree in business. Got recruited to a dead end job while in college and stayed there over twenty years and is only really finding himself now. </p>
<p>His business degree was fairly useless as anything besides a weak credential. He learned nothing of lasting value.</p>
<p>But this is not really on topic for this thread.</p>
<p>Absolutely, we want college to lead to some career. It just doesn’t always work that way. I would still support the endeavor.</p>
<p>I ran the FAFSA calculators at [FinAid</a>! Financial Aid, College Scholarships and Student Loans](<a href=“http://www.finaid.org%5DFinAid”>http://www.finaid.org) when Happykid was in 9th grade, and again when she was in 10th grade, and again this year. I also ran the ones at [::</a> College Planning Made Easy | Inside Source for College Admissions Requirements](<a href=“http://www.collegeboard.com%5D::”>http://www.collegeboard.com) this year so I could compare the results. The figure for our family is roughly 1/3 of our AGI.</p>
<p>Right now, I tell the kid and the dad that we can “afford” community college. It will mean that not a cent goes into my IRA, and that all of my income (part-time job) will go into tuition/fees there. I’m actively looking for a full-time job (or at least a better paid part-time job), but who knows when/where I’ll get one. We are essentially a one-income family, and are helping to support grandma in another state. Money will be very tight, and our retirement funds will continue to suffer.</p>
<p>Until I get a better job, or grandma dies (or moves in with us), parent loans are out of the question. There is no place in the budget for that loan re-payment to come from. I absolutely do not want my kid to be in this same position when her possible kids go to college and so am concentrating my financial efforts on funding the retirement.</p>
<p>Assuming that community college works out, the State U will be almost affordable for the last two years. It is commuting distance, and while none of us really want Happykid to have to commute it would be possible. Our EFC is almost exactly the in-state COA. If we continue out-of-pocket the cost of the community college, plus whatever loans Happykid qualifies for, plus whatever her part-time job will pay for, maybe we will get close enough that a small parent loan will be do-able.</p>
<p>That’s the plan for now. We will see how it works.</p>
<p>Wishing you all the best as you deal with your own financial choices!</p>
<p>Cut back to the early 1990s: I was sitting with a financial planner, working out projections for the cost of 4 years of undergraduate education at a private school starting in 2009. “You really expect the yearly cost of an undergraduate education to significantly outpace inflation?” he asked. He was totally skeptical. He thought it was more important that I figure out how to retire before age 65. But I love my work, and it’s good thing, too…</p>
<p>Since I sat with that financial planner, some things that I scarcely could have dreamed of, years past, actually happened. First, the Ivy Leagues committed to become or remain accessible to people who aren’t necessarily from extremely privileged backgrounds. Did any of you ever expect that? Not me. Second, our D turned out to be talented and incredibly hard working. She had some great teachers, too, in the local public schools, people who encouraged her ambition AND helped her apply for scholarships. Result: D got accepted, with good offers from many schools, and will be attending her ‘dream school.’ </p>
<p>How did we come up with our “number.” We began saving and planning for college expenses before having children. We have just the one child. The biggest educational expense we paid, second only to what we’ll be paying for her college, was for the superb child care she got when she was very little. Since then, it’s been public and charter school. Occasional travel, since none of our family lives nearby. Frugal: Love my 13 year old car! Hope to still have it when DD starts grad school! If not, walking or the bus for me!</p>
<p>Both my H and myself went through college and grad school without parental financial contributions and without much debt, private and state schools. Pell grants and the like. If our financial situation greatly changes, or if the financial aid falls apart, we would probably take out <em>some</em> loans to help our D get through undergraduate and/or graduate or professional school. The proviso: that she has a plan and is working towards it, and that the work itself is rewarding for her, as well as likely to yield long-range benefits. </p>
<p>I teach at a large state school. A great school. Has a terrific honors college. Sure, I’d be happy if DD had chosen such a school. OTOH, what could be more worth paying for, than a really great education, since she has shown, repeatedly, that she’s motivated, capable, eager to go out into the world and continue working hard? Could she and the people she meets change the world for the better?</p>
<p>Even with generous aid, we’re not off the hook. We’ll continue to take additional work, on top of full-time jobs. We’ll pray and pray not to get laid off. DD should continue to show (as ever) that she is working hard, developing plans, rising to the opportunities. With all this, education won’t be a cost we’ll cut back on.</p>
<p>We did not talk about it, just paying balance whatever is left after Merit scholarships, which we consider D’s contribution. Her Merit $$ cover tuition.</p>
<p>So many wonderful ways of going about it. I really salute every parent here. And all the hard working kids, too.</p>
<p>My kids sure did their bit by qualifying for need-blind, covers the entire cost of attending colleges. Doesn’t mean we didn’t pay a sizable chunk, but we did get more aid than we would have had they not qualified for schools in this category.</p>
<p>When I first started running college numbers and investment scenarios in the early 90s, I calculated that we would be able to pay without using debt for public college educations for two kids. That gave me lots of comfort.</p>
<p>We hit some lucky breaks (hello, giant bull market run, continued employment and good health!!) and providing our kids with a private college education without debt on their part seemed like it was feasible (although we’ve had to swallow hard after the stock market tumble since 2008–the stock market giveth and it taketh away). </p>
<p>So we didn’t have a number in mind–just told our kids to go for it.</p>
<p>We told our kids we’d make it happen, so long as they made it happen from their end. We knew they would be expensive to educate. They also knew from the get-go (i.e., middle school) they’d have skin in the game as well – Staffords ($19k over four years), summer and term-time jobs and scholarships. That was the tradeoff for an “eat what you kill” philosophy, as my kids put it. </p>
<p>I ran EFC numbers when S1 was in middle school – we were borderline for any FA with one in school. We assumed we’d be full pay and anything else that came in would be gravy. DH and I were absolutely agreed that we would cobble together whatever it took. We both did the pay-your-own-way gig in college and were not going to have our kids repeat that experience.</p>
<p>We don’t have as much in the bank as we’d like – I was out on unpaid medical leave for five years and am back on a PT basis within the past year. Everything I make goes straight to the EFC Fund. OTOH, 90% of the college money we did save has been in money market instruments for years and years, so while we didn’t make tons, we didn’t lose anything, either. We refinanced our house six years ago to a 15-year fixed in order to increase our equity with the thought that we’d hit our HELOC as needed for tuition. While the housing market collapsed, we are still in good shape. </p>
<p>S1 paid over half his COA this year between scholarships, work and a $3500 Stafford. Over the next three years he’ll pay about 40%. Don’t know what kind of merit $$ may be in the picture for S2. We should qualify for some FA while both kids are in college, and hope that those two years are the only times we have to hit the equity line.</p>
<p>I am thankful for living frugally, having excellent medical and life insurance that have removed some of the financial worries, a spouse with an extremely secure job, and children who have stepped up to the plate every step of the way.</p>
<p>Firsttimemom–you asked how others came up with their “number” but how we arrived at that and how you would arrive at that given your statement about not having any savings or retirement plans–should be totally different. </p>
<p>You are an incredibly generous parent to be considering how to assist your child in continuing his or her education, but for you the best thing may be to offer to help them find a low cost education, or offer to provide free room and board if they live at home during college. Your financial resources sound like they are very minimal, and so to expect you to pay for college before you even have a rainy day savings account for yourself seems to me to be unrealistic.</p>