<p>thank you collegequery. You are right you need 15 posts. I am not opposed to religion and am myself church goer. My child has turned their back on our religion to be “saved” and I am not sure what the difference is between my faith and theirs. I worry that they are trying to get my child to become a minister for their campus group, which would mean why get a degree? I wonder is this normal. Ugh so confused and worried I will do the wrong thing. Maybe I am overreacting and it is not a problem. Hope it is not. They seem happy.</p>
<p>I would definitely go to the baptism. You’ll want to see the group up close. Being a “minister” for their campus group may not mean what you think. It may just be an organizer of sorts and not interfere with their career plans at all. OR, it may be more consuming and threaten your child’s future. The only way to know is to take your child up on their invitation and get to know what it’s all about.
The fact that he/she wants you there is a good sign, I would think.</p>
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<p>This sounds like a cult to me.</p>
<p>I would definitely go to the baptism, though, and try to observe the situation while remaining noncommittal. (Think “smile and nod, smile and nod.”) The worst thing that could happen would for you to be shut out.</p>
<p>I’d still be calling the school chaplain for info too - then attend the baptism.</p>
<p>We’re Christian so I fully understand sharing faith, but I’d want to make sure about any group that is into “getting converts” isn’t a cult.</p>
<p>The call for “re-baptism” is odd to me and sends up a red flag. Churches that don’t recognize the baptisms of other Christian denominations tend to be out of the mainstream in their doctrinal beliefs. Catholic, Lutheran, Methodist, Presbyterian etc. do not re-baptize. It is a once-in-a-iifetime event.</p>
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But Baptists–one of the largest groups in the US, and hardly a cult–do re-baptize, because they don’t recognize infant baptism. There are probably others as well. This is not necessarily a sign of being out of the mainstream at all.</p>
<p>^^^ I agree. The whole thing isn’t cause for alarm. It’s cause for investigation IMO.</p>
<p>I would add that even very mainstream campus groups, like InterVarsity for example, may inspire some kids to get a lot more religious, or even to consider religious careers, or at least some mission work. This could be alarming to families that aren’t very religious, but it’s not the same as joining a cult or being manipulated.</p>
<p>Again, thank you all for your input. It is giving me direction to have other ideas and not feel so lost. I will go to the baptism. I wonder if I should raise my concerns to the “college minister” or keep my mouth shut. How do I get ahold of a chaplain. The school is very large and I don’t know where to start. I wonder if it is okay to find one and ask if they have heard anything out of the ordinary. Is if normal for your child to tell you that he puts God before his earthly family now? So many questions. I hope to hear from the Maine also. Again thank you for all input. I am taking all into consideration.</p>
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That construction is troubling, although the concept is present in many religions. If it means cutting off contact from family if they criticize or question the religion, then it’s a big danger signal. Look on the college’s website for the University Chaplain’s office.</p>
<p>I would not worry about that statement in and of itself. Christianity also requires its followers to put God before everything else.
That however does not mean seclusion or anything of that nature. If your daughter talks about any requirements like limiting contact to other people, some obscene rituals etc., I would worry.
Any chance that group has a listing on the university’s homepage? You might be able to find out more about it.</p>
<p>NJSue, I was going to say the same thing about “re-baptism” raising my warning bells. Most mainline denominations do recognize the initial baptism, provided that it is done in the Trinitarian formula.</p>
<p>But I didn’t know that about the Baptists, so I stand corrected about that. Thank you, Hunt.</p>
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<p>We’re just a run-of-the-mill Catholic family but I would hope that my children grow to value God above even their earthly family. I would want them to put God above everything else.</p>
<p>But to be told that all of a sudden? That concerns me. I knew a guy in college who got caught up in a campus “Christian” cult-like group and one of the first things they do is try to marginalize the family of origin.</p>
<p>It went from “God before your earthly family” to “Your earthly family will hinder your spiritual development” to “Disassociate from your harmful earthly family and only listen to and obey us.”</p>
<p>Please keep us posted as to how things go for your child. Wishing you all the best.</p>
<p>I would not worry about that statement in and of itself. Christianity also requires its followers to put God before everything else.
That however does not mean seclusion or anything of that nature. If your daughter talks about any requirements like limiting contact to other people, some obscene rituals etc., I would worry.
Any chance that group has a listing on the university’s homepage? You might be able to find out more about it.</p>
<p>Just to clarify, as a person who was raised in the American Baptist church, Baptists practice “Believers Baptism”. A person must be old enough to make their own decision about being baptized, therefore infants are not baptized. I was baptized at 16.</p>
<p>More about Baptists: Generally, Baptists believe in “believer’s baptism,” which means that the person needs to be able to make the decision to follow Christ for him/herself. Usually, that baptism is by immersion, although some Baptists use pouring. What some denominations call “baptism” (of infants), many Baptists would call “christenings” because they believe that no one else can make a decision for the infant. They don’t believe in re-baptism; rather, they consider believer’s baptism to be the one and only baptism.</p>
<p>There are many Baptist churches, however, that are “open membership” churches. Those churches’ members believe that someone who is joining the church from another Christian faith tradition, has already been baptized as an infant, and who affirms that baptism should not be baptized unless he/she chooses to do so. In other words, they consider the infant baptism to be as valid a baptism as the new member considers it to be. I know quite a number of Baptist churches that have members who were raised as Methodists, Presbyterians, Episcopalians, even Catholics.</p>
<p>Have you looked up this group on the Internet? To me, it sounds like it may just be a variation of Christianity with which you’re not comfortable. I wouldn’t be excited about my child joining a group that had a different worship style and theological slant than our own church. However, that’s not the same as a cult, and from what you’ve said so far, I don’t hear any cult alarm bells. I like the idea of asking a campus chaplain or two. If campus chaplains (who are usually moderate and interested in interfaith cooperation) are concerned, then at that point you should be too.</p>
<p>I just saw your thread, newconmom. I really would like to speak with you. Please post three more times on this thread (you will have to wait 60 seconds between each post) so that you can send PMs. I will PM you in a second.</p>
<p>I think I will be able to tell you if the group is legitimate or not. I grew up in a “legalistic” church. Although I don’t agree with its theology, it is not a cult. Just because a church is strict doesn’t mean it’s out-of-bounds.</p>
<p>The fact that the church is “non-denominational” and wants your child to be baptized could be a concern. That sounds like the group my son was involved with.</p>
<p>It concerns me how widespread this seems to be.
My daughter brought home some religious tracts when she was in high school from a group that I researched which seemed to be a very restrictive group. She didn’t follow up as she has been a pagan from birth.
( she told me when she was about 4 or 5, that she didnt believe in Santa, but she believed in Mother Earth);)</p>
<p>I havent read everything on this site, but if even part of it is accurate, it is scary.
[The</a> Ross Institute Internet Archives for the Study of Destructive Cults, Controversial Groups and Movements](<a href=“http://www.rickross.com/]The”>http://www.rickross.com/)</p>
<p>To fill everyone in, I contacted my son’s school about the group. The chaplain had already received complaints from several people. She explained that a public school can’t kick religious groups off campus. She did meet with my son’s “discipler” and told him to lay off the intimidation. My son got many, many texts and voice mails from the group on his phone (I had taken it from him by this point, after he was admitted to the hospital). After the chaplain spoke to the guy, he texted, “If you want me to stop contacting you, text back the word yes.” So I did, and have heard nothing more from him.</p>
<p>My son was in the hospital for a full three weeks. He then was discharged and attended a day program for a week and a half. At that point, he went catatonic two times in one day. We took him to the ER and they readmitted him. Two days after that, he was so catatonic that they had to give him injections of a med without his consent. It was hell. For one day, I really wondered if he was going to make it. Later that day, he did “come to,” but he was still in rough shape.</p>
<p>He said that everything looked “abstract” to him. He could not name objects in his room. When I asked him, he would say, “I see shadows, reflections, love, healing, affliction…” He couldn’t even walk well because the floor didn’t appear solid.</p>
<p>I was not happy with the attention (lack of!) he was getting. Five days after he came to, I was contacting doctors, nurses, physician’s assistants, the hospital advocate, etc., etc. I went in my son’s room and asked him to try the naming exercise one more time, so I could try to communicate my concerns with his care team. He struggled for quite a few minutes, then suddenly said, “My perspective is changing! Things are starting to look real again! Wow! That’s a desk, chair, mirror, door…” It was amazing. Later he said it was my love and also my attempt to understand what he was going through that pulled him out.</p>
<p>So he was discharged last week after a 10-day stay. He was doing well until yesterday. He struggles in the groups that meet during the day program. Today, we are trying to figure out what to do.</p>
<p>Obviously, he was already mentally ill when this group got hold of him, but we are certain that they were the trigger to this entire episode. It just makes me sick that we didn’t realize what was going on. He lives at home and we keep a close eye on him, but it wasn’t enough.</p>
<p>Thanks for the update, ML. My heart aches for you and your son. I’m sorry, I don’t have any concrete advice, just best wishes. As you know, it’s still all about the meds, and it takes a lot of time. Hang in there. Wish there were a magic bullet here.
I’m sure you have helped a lot of people with your input to this and other threads. Thank you.</p>
<p>I agree, hang in there.
This is helpful just because anyone can be subseptible, and many people will have a friend or family member who needs support and a clearer perspective.</p>