Hey, I’ve never posted in this section of CC so here goes, I guess.
My roommate and I requested each other after meeting on Facebook and for the most part we get along wonderfully. There’s one small spot that is kind of sore the both of us though, I guess…
My roommate ended up renting the microfridge, with the idea that I’d pay her back for half (we agreed to this ahead of time). I told her I’d bring a TV, which I did, and she promised to buy Apple TV for our room (sort of a way to use Netflix, Hulu, iTunes, etc. through the TV). Only when we got to school did she mention “Oh yeah, I didn’t get Apple TV because I ended up blowing all my grad money on other stuff haha!”
I have actually since not paid her back (mainly something that slipped my mind/I didn’t have the money on hand) but she has mentioned multiple times that she intends to use the $100 that I owe her for the fridge to buy alcohol/go out to dinner with her boyfriend. As in, the money that I owe to her father (who bought the microfridge) will go straight to her for leisure money. She also receives an allowance of $2000 a month from the same father. I know that it really shouldn’t matter because I owe her the money regardless of how much she has, but it’s very hard to muster up my own personal money to give straight to her to blow when I know she already has so much (and I don’t).
So, regardless of me being a little bit bitter…I obviously owe her the money, and I have it ready to go but I am wondering if it would be okay for me to buy the Apple TV instead of repaying her? It costs $100, which is what I owe her. She had promised to buy it for our room and then didn’t (and didn’t warn me before school). This way I know the money won’t go straight to booze/dates, and at least it’s something we can both use. I know it’s kind of a shady move, but she DID promise to buy the Apple TV so I think she kind of owes that to me as well as I owe her the $100.
Is it wrong for me to buy the Apple TV in place of giving her $100 cash? Thanks for any advice, I know I’m not really in the right here but I don’t think she totally is either.
I was asking mainly for public opinion, obviously I’m on the fence here and I’m aware that right and wrong varies by person, hence trying to survey to see what other people thought. I knew it was kind of iffy, no need to try and shame me when I clearly mentioned I was unsure about this and just wanted to see what others thought. From what I’m gathering, I should just give her the $100 like I originally felt I should’ve. Thanks.
I’m not against drinking or having a boyfriend, I just think it would be different if she were to use the money to buy textbooks, art supplies (for her major), train/bus tickets home, etc.
No, it is not wrong. But, here’s the deal. One of the most satisfying things you will learn in college is communication. Sit down with her, tell her you’re a bit perturbed that she didn’t follow through on her end of the deal and that you came up with the perfect solution…the fact that you confront her might end the whole issue. I’ve found in life that people who think they can take advantage of you back down the minute you show your cards…I’d start there, what’s the worst that can happen? Which is a question you should always ask yourself btw. She might insist that you just pay her, have the $$ ready. She’ll know where you stand either way.
Not sure why I didn’t think of that myself, probably too caught up in this little passive-aggressive game which is usually not my personality at all. That’s really good advice, thanks so much!
@requin LOL. She’s crazy smart and on a full-tuition scholarship, but I have no idea if she’d still be getting that allowance if she wasn’t on that scholarship. Her laptop wasn’t working around class registration this semester and had to check her financial aid on my laptop because she had a hold on her account, and I saw her EFC of $125k. Her parents are divorced and both are remarried, which probably contributes to how high that is, but still they do pretty well and with her on full-tuition scholarship I’m sure it’s more than affordable to slip her some money (though she does usually have to call and ask for more by the last week of the month…) She’s not snobby at all about it though, I’d probably never have known that she came from so much money had I not seen her financial aid page/known that she has that big of an allowance.
She promised to buy Apple TV and didn’t. You probably should have raised this issue completely separate from the refrigerator.
Even though your post indicates you know it’s wrong, you’ve got this idea that because your roommate has more money than you that you don’t have to pay her back. This is just wrong, and it doesn’t matter that her father paid for the refrigerator unless your dealings were with him on the front-end.
Normally I would say that you should just explain that you haven’t paid her yet because of the promise to buy the Apple TV, and that you think that’s where the $100 should go. But your repeatedly expressed concern that she might enjoy herself with the money you repay her kind of bothers me and suggests that you might be looking at this whole thing through a really warped prism.
If you should decide to make an issue of the Apple TV, I would urge you not to bring up her allowance, that her dad paid for the fridge, or the fact that you are worried she might enjoy herself with the money you repay. It really doesn’t matter if her allowance is $2,000 per day; each roommate should pay his or her share.
Can I ask why you are renting a micro fridge for $200 when you can buy a new one for less than that? Home Depot has them for $159 with free shipping. Even if you just gave it away at the end of the year you’d still come out ahead.
Yeah, I realize I was being kind of weird about this issue, hence my asking for opinions. I would never address her allowance or anything to her, I thought it was relevant in the case of Apple TV. We’re back at school now and I just gave her the $100 flat out.
We rented it because I won’t likely need one in future years, and my family didn’t want to deal with transporting it back and forth. I hadn’t considered free shipping, but it’s well into the year now so I’ll live with that wasted $40 lol.