Hello I’m currently a college freshman. My first year I knew I wasn’t ready to leave home so I committed to a branch campus of a bigger university about 30 min from my home… I hate it there. There was nothing to do, I only had clssses 3 days a week, and I had no friends… my highschool friends all went away for college so I only got to see them when they came home on weekends… now I’m transferring to temple university which is a really big school 4 hours from my home. It’s a whole different ball game. I’m excited because I know it’s a really good school with lots of opportunities… but I’m also terrified… I love being home with my family and the thought of being so far away is making me really sad… I won’t have my car so I’m not going to be able to come home when I want… pretty much only on breaks and maybe a few other times if I take the train home… I’m just really anxious and I don’t know how to feel… I keep questioning whether or not this is the right choice… at first I was going to go to the main campus of the branch I’m at now because it’s only and hour and a half away, but it’s not that great of school… I’ve already put my deposit in for temple but I really want to back out but I know I shouldn’t let the thought of leaving home hold me back but it’s hard not to… i know we all have to leave home eventually but I feel like I’m still not ready
I don’t know what kind of a person you are but it seems like you want to better yourself and your future and you know what your next steps should be. Think of it this way, you’re going to need to go away for a bit for a better future, and your family will be so proud when you graduate and return home, right?
It is a lot easier to make friends if you stay on campus for the weekend, so that is a plus that you can’t go home easily any time. I suspect one reason you didn’t make friends last year is because you could just leave, and did. Go and put your heart into it for a year, and see how it is. You’ve got this.
How you’re feeling right now is completely normal, and most college students I’ve talked to have felt the same way. So don’t let these feelings hold you back. Know they are normal, and that this experience is worth trying. The good thing is that if you go to Temple and it doesn’t work out, you can simply transfer to a school close to home again - and that’s fine. But if it works out, wow! And regardless, you’ll have tried something really big, which is wonderful, in and of itself.
When you get to Temple, really throw yourself into the place. When people walk to lunch, go with them. If they hang out in the dorm, be there. Keep your dorm room door open when you’re there, to be sociable. Join clubs and activities and do more than just show up.
I knew I wasn’t ready to leave home so I committed to a branch campus of a bigger university about 30 min from my home… I hate it there
love being home with my family and the thought of being so far away is making me really sad.
I say go…you were close to home but you hated it there. To really get involved and make friends, you have to stay on campus on the weekends.
Also:
College is a transitional time to ease you into being an independent adult.
Do not your parents have face time?
It’s time to fly the nest. The nest is still going to be there when you need it. You made an adult decision, and you shouldn’t second guess yourself. “What if?” works the other way too. What if you go to Temple and meet people and mature, and have a great time and feel fulfilled? If it doesn’t work out, home isn’t far away. You aren’t prohibited by laws, or cars, or anything from seeing your family when you need to.
But I will caution you that it’s in your best interest to stay on campus as much as you can in the first couple of months because that’s how you meet people and get into your routine. Studies have shown that the students who commute to home on the weekends have the least satisfying experiences and make fewer friends. It’s harder to do well if you aren’t settled and committing to your decision.
I definitely agree with the post above, although it can be extremely uncomfortable and unsettling to be away from home, you’re going to have to do it one way or the other. Take it from someone who has been home practically their whole college career (due to financial reasons) although I love the campus I am at and I am grateful that I am not obligated to pay bills, I always wonder what it would have been like had I went away for school. I never truly got the college experience of staying on campus and moving away from home and in some ways I wish I did get to experience that. I know you say you’re not ready but it won’t be as horrible as you may think it is and you’ll get the opportunity to meet new people and at least say you did it. Best of luck!
I might be transferring to temple in the fall too! I’m pretty much in the same boat as you, freshman with few friends, anxiety, etc. If you ever wanna hang out let me know 