@Luckyjade2024 Good for you! You’ve made your decision for your own reasons and you don’t need to defend them. My D is at school as an advisor this week for incoming freshman. She feels REALLY badly about how different this year is and how much the freshman are missing out on. They are doing their best to make it a good experience for the freshman though within all the restriction they have. Today I struck up a conversation on the parent board with a parent of a freshman in her dorm. The parent said the girl was absolutely loving it, thought the advisors were awesome and was thrilled with her decision to be there. It was great to pass on to my daughter that though the experience might seem “lesser” to her, it’s all the freshman know, and they are happy to be there.
My D has a wonderful relationship with my husband and I but she literally could not wait to get back to school. She commented this summer in the middle of a class she was taking that she literally felt like she was having a breakdown. Dealing with the stress of her hard course load, without friends around to distract her and who can relate to her, was very difficult. She needs interaction with her peers and zoom just doesn’t cut it sometimes. So if it means she has to wear a mask and sit outside to get some peer interaction, so be it!
@homerdog
That’s true to an extent but many other countries are dealing with resurgence after reopening and Israel for example attributes some of their resurgence to opening schools.
I think students are getting a dangerous message with this whole “Can’t put life on hold forever.” Life is not on hold. Life is still happening. It may not be happening the way you like, it might be vastly different from what you imagined, but it is happening. Every moment you get to breathe and think- life is happening. Their plans are on hold- that is all and we all know plans change every day.
And for those students and adults willing to put plans on pause, who. are modifying, and adjusting expectations so as many people as possible can keep having life? Thank you.
Duke will now test 10,000 per week including faculty and staff. Not sure if that’s everyone? I guess we will find out if once a week testing is enough. I don’t know how quickly their tests come back but there could still be positive cases walking around since I’m assuming no one has to wait in quarantine for each result.
Kids from poor families make that transition all the time. How many low income people do you know who foot the bill for an apartment for their 18 year olds in a college town far, far away so they can go play at being an adult?
I discussed financial constraints in a prior post on this topic. Obviously, those exist. But for those who can afford it and want to, there are benefits to living independently while college age. It isn’t necessarily " playing adult", and I do not judge those who do it, or those who need to remain home for financial or health reasons.
For very low income families, many colleges are permitting students to remain on campus regardless, due to a hardship exception.
@1NJParent - I can answer for my freshmen son, it is not being home and taking classes from the dining room again., he has eaten most of his meals the past week outside on the quad , he has been there a week, is it what his sister had when she went to college 6 years ago, hell no, is it better than staying home , hell yes.
I think it’s hard for many parents, myself included, to imagine the college experience being worthwhile because most of what we hear about from schools are the failures thus far, the behavior of the rule breakers, and seemingly draconian restrictions. I’d like to hear more information from posters like @NJdad07090 and @Luckyjade2024 once he spends some time on campus, as well as the poster from Duke.
Some positive experiences would help balance the perspective. But I will say for myself, my concerns about long term effects from viral infection pushes me towards the “keep my child home for the year” camp.
Honestly, there ARE positive experiences out there, but people don’t post them on this thread. I’ve received PMs from other CC members sharing their DC’s experiences going back to college, and encouraging me as my D20 heads off, but after over 700 pages of repeated negativity, they don’t feel comfortable posting here. The minute anyone tries to express any positive news or hopeful position, they are shut down with a flood of posts picking it apart. Just look at the responses to @Luckyjade2024 's comment about Tufts handing out blankets, and his/her hope concerning their plan. Disagreement is healthy, but the tone here can be quite dismissive and a bit condescending. There is little attempt at dialogue anymore. Posters continually say how much they are “rooting for the schools that are opening,” but then dismiss any positive news as temporary, an exception, or mere “wishful thinking.” It’s a bit comical.
I’m not saying people should stop posting their views. There is clearly a core group of posters on this thread that enjoy getting together and sharing their pessimism. Daily. Over and over again, with little to no new information. Redundancy at its best. Nothing wrong with that. After all, there is plenty out there to help support that view. But no one should be surprised that it alienates anyone with a different position, who might also have support for their views. I’m amazed at the few posters on this thread that keep trying to assert different perspectives. They must be exhausted.
So, if you’re expecting to hear positive experiences here, I wouldn’t hold your breath. I certainly won’t post my D’s experience at her LAC this semester, even if it’s wonderful and a great success. Many of us feel, “Why even bother?”
I’m with @Luckyjade2024 and @ProfSD , this thread has taken a very dark, pessimistic turn.
We helped our son move into his apartment yesterday. He understands what he’s up against better than most students. His intention is to make the best of a completely crappy situation. No matter what, he’ll stay at school to volunteer in the community when not attending class or studying.
I’m bowing out. Whatever your students decide, however their school year is formatted, I hope they work hard and succeed to the best of their ability.
Good points ProfSD. I appreciate everyone is coming from their own experiences and perspectives, tolerance for risk, financial situation, and several other important parameters. And an abundance of caution can’t be discounted. But a definite glass half full mentality.
And I take back what I said about the Parent who said he/she was not being rude by posting a point by point rebuttal of the Student’s view but instead just questioning the student’s view. And indeed the student should understand college is all about learning to be questioned and not consider the rebuttal post rude. (Hah, like there is much diversity of thought at many higher institutions, but I digress).
I went back and glanced over the post and NO, there was no invitation to debate or presenting an opposing view point that invited discussion. It was a point by point rebuttal – and even if the rebuttal points could be considered as having merit, it was not offered in a respectful way that engendered discussion.
Tulane sent out 2nd week testing results. Class started today but freshmen moved in starting on the 10th. RAs and orientation leaders moved in before that.
"Dear Tulane Community:
Since July 27, Campus Health has administered 12,051 screening tests for returning students, faculty and staff from which 47 positive cases have been identified, representing a positivity rate of 0.39 percent.*
In addition to the Tulane testing program, we have confirmed 35 additional positive results from tests that were conducted by outside healthcare providers for members of the Tulane community, based on their symptoms or known contacts. In total, we have identified 82 positive cases. Of these cases, 13 are no longer required to isolate/quarantine, 69** cases remain active and under isolation/quarantine. The immediate contacts of all those who tested positive have been notified. All known active cases and identified contacts are in quarantine or isolation — 92% of Tulane quarantine/isolation space is still available."
More positive news, for now. They had initially said they would test 5% of the community per day, but today said that all undergrads will be tested every week.
Both my D20 and S20 are starting on-campus experiences (at separate colleges) with mostly on-line classes, living in dorms. They have very different personalities and outlooks, but they are both united in wanting to go. Mainly two reasons: 1) they feel staying home and missing out on meeting their fellow students, and at least seeing and walking the campus, would be a mistake; and 2) as described, even with all the restrictions, being on campus would be better than sitting in their childhood bedroom, which they’ve already been doing since March.
We’ll see, I guess, how much it really is worth it, and how long it lasts.
I’m a little surprised at how many of their peers are choosing to move into apartments as freshmen, either near their respective (all-remote) campuses, or locally. I guess they too want to get out of their childhood bedrooms; but taking on the “adulting” part of shopping/preparing food and cleaning doesn’t seem worth it to me, unlike living in dorms where you have food service. I’m sort of the opposite of @1NJParent that way.
This thread has taken on a somewhat negative tone, as some have noted, so I thought I should chime in with a more positive report. I agreed with much of what @Luckyjade2024 said, although my son is now a sophomore, and his situation is a little different. Denison completed a staged move-in of all students last weekend and is now halfway through the first week of classes. In some ways, Denison’s plan is less restrictive than some others, in that they have invited everyone back and are not limiting students to single rooms (everyone at Denison is in on-campus housing), but they do have a very robust set of rules and a testing protocol that will see a slice of the campus community tested each week, in addition to testing for anyone who is symptomatic or has been around someone who is symptomatic. Students must answer a wellness questionnaire each day - they did the same thing for the two weeks before arriving on campus - and show a wellness badge on their phone to gain access to most campus buildings. The class model is hybrid, but as things turned out, all of my son’s classes are remote for the moment. He is an adaptable kid and is just happy to be back with his friends and teammates. His teachers are doing a good job with the remote classes, and he finds he actually likes it. He and his roommates are eating mostly in the dining halls. The dining halls are socially-distanced and by reservation only, but he says it’s not an issue as most kids are choosing to do take-out and eat in the tents the school has set up on the lawn. (No picnic blankets at Denison, but lots of chairs.) Students are mostly abiding by the rules regarding masks, etc., and the school has made it clear they are serious about enforcement, including asking students to leave if they do not comply. Like many other LACs, Denison is relatively remote, located in a small town about an hour outside of Columbus, and that and the fact it is a residential college, make things somewhat more manageable, but the school has also put a great deal of effort into its planning. So far, so good. No fall sports, but athletic practice starts next week.
The phrase “can’t put your life on hold forever” where I am means people aren’t changing their lives much at all. And that concerns me. There are a number of people (myself included) who have and continue to mostly put their lives on hold. It irritates me the ones who aren’t. Where I am students are leaving now to go to their state universities. I’m in a hotspot, so students from my area will go to other parts of the state and possibly contribute to new hotspots in those places.
And on the topic of k-12 schools, they don’t start here for a few weeks. And the first 2 weeks at least will be all-virtual (the only public school system in my area not to commit to the first 9 weeks online). 40% of parents have signed up for the virtual-only for the first semester option. So there are covid metrics which must be met for the system to go f2f, and when it happens it won’t be the hybrid model. It will be only certain grades (and not just pre-k to gr. 5). Some believe the metrics are too liberal (I agree – there should be no f2f if the positivity rate is above 5%, but my system has decided it’s okay to go up to 10%. My state is lousy at testing. The desks will be only 3’ apart, and there will 1/seat (excepting household members can sit together) on the buses, unless there isn’t room. PPE and disinfecting materials? Who knows? And there are many school buildings of differing ages, so who knows how well the HVAC systems will work towards covid mitigation?
If only we had effective treatments that could be used before hospitalization, and if only we knew more about the long-term effects. But all the “we must have kids in school!” contingent here cares about is the low death rate. And that kids’ need to be in school is more important than the community’s health. Ugh!
Great news about Denison.
And Oaktown78 your children’s plans sounds positive empowering for them. And I am on team LuckyJade. Wishing you the best as you grow in adulthood into a positive person.
I prefer this thread to be the source of information and impassioned analyses related to colleges and COVID-19, rather than a cheering section. For those of you who don’t know, I’m not a disinterested party. I have a son currently attending college. I’m also intensely private and independent. My son is perhaps even more so (he wouldn’t be on a site like this). With my encouragement, he makes all the major decisions regarding colleges (and his life) since he started applying for colleges when he was HS senior. I’m always there to provide advises (some unsolicited), lots of them at the beginning and a lot fewer now. He made his final decision on college selection (one of the best, not only in academics but also in its caring for its students), and he also made his decision on whether or not to dorm in the fall (he decided not to) before his college announced its fall plan. I try to be a sounding board, an objective analyst/critic of his reasoning, and offer perspectives he may or may not have fully considered. Once he made his decisions, I fully supported all of them. If he had made different decisions, I would have supported them, too.
I understand the situation of every student, and every family, is different, and there’re valid reasons for different decisions. I’m here only to offer different perspectives, not to criticize those decisions. I did, and I will, criticize a college’s decision or its plan, however, since it does affect lots of people: its students, staff, faculty, the community it’s in, and beyond.
Here’s a piece of good news that no one can pick apart: after dropping my son off at college in PA, I returned to MA where everyone coming in from any state not on the good list (I think there are 6 exempt states right now) is required to quarantine for 14 days or get a negative Covid test. My results came back in a little over 48 hours and I was negative. Yippee. I’m out of quarantine.
I realize this is not how quarantine works in @“Cardinal Fang” ’s world, but I live in Charlie Baker’s world and those are his rules.
As an aside it has gotten much easier to get a Covid test here in MA. I tried to see If I could schedule one awhile back and couldn’t without symptoms or known contact with an affected person. But on Monday I called my doctor’s office and said I needed one because of travel and they said their next opening was in an hour. There is a drive through testing site in their parking lot. Very quick and easy.
Now back to our regularly scheduled programming about how no college should be opening, and those that try are all going to fail soon.
Don’t think my son would want the blanket but it’s a good idea maybe to just have one in their backpack if not Tufts. I am sure the schools sell them.
One of the biggest things we saw with both our kids was just individual growth from semester to semester to the point we hardly recognized them. It was the independence and confidence of “heh, I got this”. It was fixing their “own” mistakes. Maybe going shopping for food /clothes for the first time. It was being on their own and parents not telling them what to do.
Major suggestions to those that have kids going off. When they panic call… Listen. Just listen. Guide them to find an answer to their problem but “don’t” fix the problem for them… So important…
