<p>My daughter's boyfriend goes to UW and says he wants to "keep his college life separate from his life with her?" Can anyone tell me what this means other than "I want to do things behind your back that I don't want you to know about"? Does it mean "I don't want anyone here to know I have a girlfriend back home?" Does it mean "I don't know the people here well enough to let them into my personal life?" What? I just can't get rid of the paranoia that he's hiding something to her detriment and I don't want her to be hurt or be played for a fool, esp since she's planning to go to UW next year. I just don't get it, but I don't see how it can be good!</p>
<p>Sounds like he is unwilling to completely break up but he is ready to have a life without her. Time for her to move on and realize she has a life without him as well. Better for both of them to be out of the boyfriend/girlfriend status. If they happen to reconnect when they are both at UW it was meant to be. Otherwise consider this his moving on from his HS life. He may be clumsy in how he is doing it but it makes sense for him to enjoy being a freshman and meet new people without the encumberance of an old flame. Tell your D to enjoy her HS senior year without thinking about him- be open to going out with others et al.</p>
<p>It sounds like they should breakup. This kind of phenomenon is pretty common really (i.e. a person goes off to college somewhere without their current significant other and realizes that they want to explore this new world they are in without their current s/o who doesn’t fit anymore).</p>
<p>I would be more concerned if my daughter wanted to go to a school that her boyfriend attends.</p>
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<p>Why? If it’s a school like UW they could literally go through an entire semester without bumping into each other.</p>
<p>If my daughter wanted(not boyfriend related) to go to UW and her boyfriend attends then thats fine. If my daughter wanted to go to UW and her boyfriend went to UM and she changed her mind based on relationship then I have a problem.</p>
<p>Not only is this relationship over, but the boyfriend is keeping his old flame around on the back burner. Truly pitiful behavior on his part and I am sure your daughter will one day be very grateful that she did not end up with a person that would treat her this way.</p>