<p>The who/ whom issue mirrors exactly the usage of he/ him (the m is a hold over from Latin inflection). Most people wouldn’t say “to he,” but rather “to him.” Likewise, it’s “to whom,” not “to who.” </p>
<p>Is grammar (and words in the dictionary) supposed to be prescriptive or descriptive? It depends on whom you ask. What is considered correct also depends on the country, and historical decisions. In the 1800s, some now dead people decided that singular subjects must always take gendered singular pronouns, without considering the future possibility that many of us in the 21st century find the grammatically correct option of “everyone take out his or her pencil” long and stilted. Yes, we can turn it into “all students take out their pencils,” but it’s not quite the same. </p>
<p>We need to bring back sentence diagramming into our nation’s schools.</p>