SHAME ON SWAT: The vote on banning frats at Swarthmore reeks of intolerance

Colleges and Universities A-Z Swarthmore College
1

<p>Today and tomorrow, students are voting on whether or not frats should be banned from Swarthmore. I see no reason why only frats should come under this scrutiny. As a parent of a student in a frat, I think it's taught him a lot of excellent lessons--including how to clean a house! But this group is tolerant, fun, hardworking, multicultural, and it makes him happy. It means so much to him that he pays for it himself. I am writing to Swarthmore's Phoenix newspaper about this and I urge anyone else who cares to as well. Here's what I have to say:
Dear Swarthmore Students, </p>

<p>As a Swarthmore parent, I am truly disgusted that there is a referendum on the subject of fraternities. I see no more reason why the student body at large is voting on fraternities than they should on any other club that is based on ethnicity, gender, religion or any other kind of special interest. I hoped that my son would be going to a school where the values of tolerance, equality, and freedom of choice would be respected. Instead, I see closemindedness and stereotyping. My son’s frat is ethnically and racially diverse. It includes straight and gay members. They take issues such as sexual assault and homophobia very seriously. The young men in the frat have training in rape prevention and other safety issues, and they also reach out to the community by helping young people fix their bikes in Chester and doing other projects. Yes, they do silly things during pledge time. But why should those students’ eccentricities be any less tolerated than whatever goes on during the infamous Crunkfest? </p>

<p>My son sent me a photograph of a chalk message that said, “I thought you weren’t supposed to buy your friends.” I was staggered at the blind sense of privilege of the writer of this message. I am well aware that many students worked very hard to get into Swarthmore. But are you not aware that by going to a prestigious, private, exclusive institution such as Swarthmore that EVERY Swattie is “buying their friends”? Or rather, that your parents and other generous benefactors are subsidizing the fantastic opportunities that you enjoy every day? You are given the opportunity not only to connect with some of the brightest students in the world, but to access a list of alumni that many other schools can only dream of. A college education of any type is a gift, not a right. Enjoy your friends—but don’t forget for a moment that it was the older generation that paid for your chance to have them. Yes, a frat costs money. So does the equestrian club. So do many activities. As it so happens, not every student who belongs to a frat is rich. My son earns every penny of his frat expenses with part-time jobs. Other students are subsidized by the national organization. The Frat pays substantial sums for its building and for its activities. As my son told me, “Our house was built by, paid for, and maintained by DU brothers for more than a century. We pay for electricity, facilities, television. We clean everything ourselves. We do all maintenance ourselves. In fact, I think we even pay taxes on the house. The brotherhood owns the house, but we make it available to the campus for parties.” </p>

<p>If you are going to vote out fraternities (and potential sororities), then it is only fair to vote out every organization that excludes any portion of the Swarthmore community. Just a quick check through student clubs listed on Swarthmore’s official website shows me a number of groups that are not open to my son. From their own descriptions, they include the Swarthmore College Korean alliance; Grapevine; the Swarthmore Asian Organization; Multi; Swarthmore Rosh Chodesh; the Society of Black Engineers; the Society of Women Engineers LaSS; and WarMothers—and I’m sure I’m missing a few. Personally, I am very glad that these groups exist, even though I, as a parent, am subsidizing organizations that don’t directly benefit my child. Because what these clubs do is promote diversity of thought and experience. They provide a safe haven for students who have special interests and backgrounds. I only ask the same respect for the students who are interested in Greek life as well. </p>

<p>Students, you are so lucky. You are so blessed. I urge you to do as the famous Swarthmore statement says, “Use well thy freedom”—and let the students who love their special organization keep it. My son told me, “I can’t believe that people are trying to destroy one of the things I love most about this school just when I’m leaving.” Please use your big brains, your imagination, your lovingkindness, and your tolerance, to allow students who think just a little bit differently than you might to be themselves, just as you would want them to show tolerance and kindness to you.</p>

2

<p>Is the vote binding?</p>

3

<p>Schools like Rice and Haverford don’t have any fraternities or sororities. Are they intolerant?</p>

4

<p>No the vote is not binding. Additionally, Greek organizations are not a “regular student group.” They are regulated by the Board of Managers not student council like every other group. They aren’t chartered, they’re special. </p>

<p>Here’s a story of a victim of an attempted assault in the fraternity: One frat brother “took a girl outside” (you get what I’m saying) and two frat brothers shut the door behind her so she couldn’t get back in. I take offense to what you’re saying. She went running in bare feet alone at night to get away. Her safety and comfort isn’t valued as much as your son’s and I’m not quite sure why. Why does your sun get to “have fun” at the expense of her bodily autonomy and integrity as a person? </p>

<p>And this is not an issue of one individual. This is a cultural and structural issue. If they hadn’t owned their own house, that episode wouldn’t have occurred. They couldn’t have controlled the space in a way that they could lock me out so that I could theoretically be assaulted. </p>

<p>The frats do not take episodes of homophobia seriously. See this op-ed: [Op-Ed:</a> More Out Than I?d Hoped | Daily Gazette](<a href=“daily.swarthmore.edu domain has changed”>daily.swarthmore.edu domain has changed)</p>

<p>Why do Greek organizations get to be treated specially? Why do they get to have their own wet space when no other campus group gets one? Why do they have a special administrator who is a liaison to Greek life. If you report a rape to him by frat brother the first thing he says is, “I am first and foremost a DU brother, I am second an alum, I am third a drug and alcohol counselor, and I am fourth an administrator.” That is structural inequity. </p>

<p>I say get rid of the houses and the special administrative liaison and then the frats will be just like every other student group. They want to have a party, they need a party permit just like everyone else. A brother assaulted you, you go through the same channels as you would with any other student. </p>

<p>Finally, your comparison of frat brothers to black students who are a part of the Black Cultural Center is pure bogus. These closed spaces are for marginalized students. Students who face discrimination and structural oppression. Frat brothers do not fit that criteria. They don’t need a safe space. </p>

<p>I know it can feel threatening to have your child’s organization coming under attack but I would really encourage you to look at this issue from the perspective of different people, people of color, queer people, women, survivors of sexual assault. Who is being prioritized in your discussion, and at whose expense?</p>

5

<p>Endicott-</p>

<p>Your post is so ridiculous. I urge you to consider HopeBrinn13’s response, who is more measured. </p>

<p>Have you paid <strong>any</strong> attention to the discussion going on on campus? Like <strong>any</strong>? At all? Because it doesn’t seem like you have, so I keep my responses short.</p>

<p>I organize my responses according to your letter’s organization.</p>

<p>Students ostensibly in favor of a ban offer <em>specific</em> personal experiences that suggest the frats condone a culture of misogyny and gay-hate. No one, I read, discussed goings-on at pledge time. It seems like you just wanted to write a polemic. And you did. Congratulations.</p>

<p>Second, you spend a LONG PARAGRAPH spinning your wheels on a single incident – the doings of at most a few anonymous students. No one cares. </p>

<p>Your logic in the third paragraph sucks. Like it’s just horrible. Students might be interested in banning the frats not only because of their exclusivity, but also because of the culture of misogyny, gay-hate, or racism ostensibly condoned or propagated by the frats. So it seems the frats might be burdening the campus by uniquely facilitating hate, in some way, on campus. Then, “it seems only fair” that we get rid of other groups that impose these negative externalities on the student body. No one has raised this issue. You use an <strong>obvious</strong> logical fallacy just because it’s convenient, and everyone can tell. </p>

<p>Your last paragraph’s appeal to the Swarthmore motto is a total non-sequitur. More logical fallacy BS. </p>

<p>It looks like the Phoenix passed on your letter. Before you post on this issue again, please take a moment to develop some self-awareness and consider how your sex, sexual orientation, socioeconomic characteristics, and race give you privilege, allowing you to live without any concern (or even awareness!) of issues that others, without aspects of your privilege, routinely face. </p>

<p>I mean seriously.</p>

6

<p>^^ Amen. Although my d did not choose Swat in the end and I have no dog in this fight, this is a student vote. They are highly intellectual, diverse, socially-aware young adults, and do not need to listen to this type of rant.</p>

7

<p>fhimas, wow, sounds like you hate frats and sororities!</p>

8

<p>No, I don’t. I seek to describe how some students might perceive the frats based on conversations I indirectly observed. </p>

<p>Personally I don’t care for them, but I don’t think my post indicates that I hate the frats. Rather, it should indicate I have no tolerance for individuals apparently without self awareness, a trait notably most students on both “sides” of the debate seemed to evidence.</p>

9

<p>fhimas. Sorry. I would soften what I wrote to say that you have no tolerance for non-self aware persons.</p>

10

<p>I’ve got plenty to say so I’m splitting it up. </p>

<p>I was pleased to see that the Swarthmore spirit of tolerance prevailed in the recent referendum, and that the majority of Swatties are open-minded enough to let fraternity and sorority the members to be part of an organization that has meaning to them—just as I am pleased that there are so many organization that serve the needs of other groups of students with common interests or backgrounds.
I would like to address a few of the earlier posters. SoCalDad: If Rice and Haverford don’t have sororities or fraternities, that is not a sign of intolerance. If they wanted to take them away when they were hundred-year-old institutions just because some students who DIDN’t belong to them didn’t like the idea of them, THAT could be a sign of intolerance. What if someone wanted to vote that no Christian organization should be allowed on campus because they might have a church on campus? And the historically troubling reasons why sororities stopped 80 years ago is no longer an issue in the current newly-formed sorority.
Now, to Hope Brinn. As I read her post, she tells the story of an attempted assault. That incident, if true, is unfortunate. But it is just one anecdote. And honestly, the whole story sounds a bit odd. I’m not saying it’s not true, just that it sounds illogical as written—maybe too many details are cut out. (At very least, what organization would lock the doors in the middle of a party?) Of course every student’s safety and comfort should be valued. In fact, I found the discussion she had in the other frat discussion on these boards quite telling—she was discussing how Swarthmore had a “rape culture.” I think that the points she made about the ineffectuality of the campus judicial committee and its slowness were very reasonable. An article she linked to there pointed out that it seemed to be ineffectual and bound by arcane rules. It pointed to a 2010 case of a woman who was allegedly date raped in a dorm room. But a dorm room is not a frat, so, anecdotally, it is safe to say that if frats are part of a “rape culture,” then so are dorms. There is no evidence that I have seen that Greek life members are more likely to assault a fellow student than any other student. In fact, I know that my DU son took his anti-sexual assault training VERY seriously. He explained to me that having a safe, empathic, protective male presence can be of great help to a woman who has just been assaulted, and he has often been on duty to make sure that no one “takes a girl” anywhere. And, by the way, the men who are on the attack could be any student, not just a frat member. If anything, the fact that these young men know that they are responsible for what happens at their parties encourages greater vigilance on their part than if no one were in charge. I don’t believe belonging to a frat makes a man any more responsible for the woman who ran from an attempted assault than living in a dorm room makes him responsible for the serial date-rapist. Those were the actions of men who behaved badly. But not all men are immoral or evil. And by the way, do you seriously think you would be safer at Smith or Wellesley, where predators KNOW that the entire institution is made up of just women?</p>

11

<p>It is true that the frats host parties with alcohol, and excessive drinking can bring on bad behavior. Whether or not frats did the work of putting together parties, I believe that the very bright young people of Swarthmore are fully capable of getting completely drunk any time they choose if they are motivated. That is absolutely no excuse for rape. But the onus should be on those who commit evil under the influence of drugs and alcohol. And the place to report a rape is to the police, not the special liaison OR the CJC, especially if they are ineffectual. Rape is a crime and should be treated as such.
As I take your suggestion to look at this issue from the perspective of “people of color, queer people, women, (and) survivors of sexual assault,” I would say the following: 1. I have already addressed the survivors of sexual assault above; 2. A large group of Swat women fought very hard to start a sorority. I respect their right to choose—do you? 3. As far as queer people go, there are a number of DU members who are gay, and two years ago, their president was gay AND black. No doubt the student who wrote the editorial about being insulted for being gay was truthful, but again, it is one anecdote, and is countered by having a number of gay students who feel comfortable enough and accepted enough there to pay the money and do the work of belonging. DU is also extremely racially diverse. If a gay, African American, or Asian student feels more comfortable in a fraternity than in an organization devoted to gay, African American, or Asian students, isn’t denying them that choice just as oppressive as not allowing them to belong to one that caters to students on racial or sexual preference grounds? Are you comfortable denying students of color free choice in their activities just because their ideology—or the ideology you stereotype them to have—doesn’t fit your own? To me, that sounds extremely condescending. As does your fellow “Yes!” colleague Joyce Wu of the school newspaper who started the petition to root out the frats. In the Feb. 21 issue of the Phoenix, it says that although “Wu admits that she has little knowledge about the opposing perspectives and about Greek life in general, she feels that this gives even more reason for a dialogue that includes all sides.” How laughable. It seems to me that Ms Wu should start with a monologue. And the monologue should be, “Why don’t I take it upon myself to learn a fact or two before I start destroying things I know nothing about?”
This could also apply to the next poster, the less-articulate Fhima, who writes, “Students might be interested in banning the frats not only because of their exclusivity, but also because of the culture of misogyny, gay-hate, or racism ostensibly condoned or propagated by the frats. So it seems the frats might be burdening the campus by uniquely facilitating hate, in some way, on campus.”
So, students should vote against frats because they (as the word ostensibly means)“ purportedly, but perhaps not actually” condone gay hate or racism “in some way.” That’s pretty darn wishy washy. It’s pretty clear that even you know that you have no idea what you’re talking about. You don’t want to say the frats actually are racist (because you have no evidence for it) and they have—oh no, they MIGHT have-- some magical hate-spreading powers that can’t actually be described in real words or facts. So in the bliss of your ignorance, you can spread actual hate by trying to abolish an institution that people have worked hard for and love—just because it is possible that they might conform to some kind of harmful stereotype—although you don’t really know if they do or don’t.<br>
And thank you for the invitation to reflect upon my gender and socio-economic status, Fhima. I am a woman who is a lifelong feminist and promoter of gay rights, so I took it on the chin with real oppression so that your generation could have greater equality and freedom. My socioeconomic status is that of a worker. That is, someone who works very hard to stuff a huge percentage of my income into Swarthmore’s pockets so that you all can enrich yourselves intellectually with the, if I am reading the Phoenix correctly, American Masturbatory Theater Company, where, “Though the company has no immediate plans for any actual group genital masturbation. . .should a member of a company begin to masturbate during a meeting, they would not stop that member from doing so – as long as the activity is useful to the exercise and no other member is traumatized by the action,” (Oh, and that’s not at ALL sexually offensive) and read the newspaper’s sex column so I can learn about, and I quote, a woman’s “poignant vag.” (Dictionaries, people!). That’s the kind of thing that nobody raises a fuss about. But the mere existence of multicultural, multi-sexual-orientated Greek societies on our campus is enough to put you on the fainting couch. All I can say is Oy Vey.
And by the way, for someone who hates those aren’t self-aware, I think you are going to find the real world very difficult if you think that the adults who paid the price for YOUR privilege of going to an extremely expensive and exclusive school like Swarthmore need to be taught any lessons on how “privileged” WE are. I would love to be a fly on the wall when you figure that one out.
And Sakacar, why should some students be invited to vote out other student’s activities when they aren’t the ones paying for it? I’m pleased they made a good choice, but it seems inappropriate.</p>

12

<p>Endicott I think this rant comes off as less reasoned and thoughtful than what you were going for. It is unclear why you care so much about an issue which does not effect you or your son- as you said, your son is leaving. It sounds like he, and other students are fully capable of having this debate themselves.</p>

<p>Also, in your friendly posts here you are stooping to some (mild) personal attacks that give a sense you are writing with anger. Maybe take a moment, and direct your admirable passion to a cause where the participants welcome your participation more.</p>

13

<p>I’ve never understood the allure of frats, but I recognize the heritage of existence. Also Frats misbehaving is nothing new, but the time tested way is to individually judge a Frat, and then if it is found lacking the charter should be pulled. The all or nothing vote seems a bit childish. Also when I was in college it was called “Rent a friend”.</p>

14

<p>Endicott is my hero.</p>

15

<p>Endicott- I don’t have much to say for this beyond (objective, in case it’s not obvious) noting that of some of your claims seem to be purposeful mischaracterizations of my claims (eg I “hate” the frats; never wrote this), or putting forth sequences of statements that do not follow usual logical rules. If we don’t willingly restrict ourselves to usual logical rules there is no reason to continue.</p>

16

<p>I encourage you all to keep an eye on the news in the next few days…</p>

17

<p>And it was a back door Endicott…</p>

18

<p><< Students who face discrimination and structural oppression>></p>

<p>What is structural oppression?</p>

19

<p>@sschickens</p>

<p>I guess you haven’t taken the recommended (soon to be required?) education in Feminist Theory?! </p>

<p>“Structural oppression theories posit that women’s oppression and inequality are a result of capitalism, patriarchy, and racism. Socialist feminists agree with Karl Marx and Freidrich Engels that the working class is exploited as a consequence of the capitalist mode of production, but they seek to extend this exploitation not just to class but also to gender.”</p>

20

<p>Thanks, Gator. No, that course wasn’t offered when I was an undergrad:-). I did not know that women’s societal problems were unique to capitalism. I hope you’re joking about such a course possibly being required.</p>