<p>I apologize in advance if this seems like a silly question. We have visited all of the schools my son applied to, at least once, if not twice in some cases. My question is now that we have received the packages from all of the schools, should we re-visit the schools on Accepted Students Days, even if attending would require massive borrowing? I am most concerned, because my son applied to schools he really liked, and what if School X is the right choice for him, even if it's not financially prudent, shall we say?</p>
<p>Or should we just re-visit the financial safeties and those with fair packages only?</p>
<p>Would love to hear your thoughts. We just would hate to close the doors prematurely. And many of these Accepted Student Days conflict with one another, so going to one means not going to another.</p>
<p>Since you have already visited, I see no reason to borrow to revisit. Your S applied to schools he liked, that’s great. Review the FA packages and determine which of those schools are financially doable, the others should immediately come off the table. Choose from only those schools where the finances are manageable. If you can swing a revisit to the top 1-2 choices, great, but if not, don’t worry about it. Many kids decide without revisiting.</p>
<p>A school that is not financially prudent, is NOT the right school for anyone. Finances are part of the fit. Good luck.</p>
<p>If it were my kid, I’d really want to focus on visiting the schools that are within reach financially. It might be hard to fall in love with the practical Toyota Corolla when one has been test driving a flashy sports car. If he goes to visit the affordable schools and is still not finding the right “fit” then you can consider visiting the other schools. It doesn’t have to be on “Accepted Students Days”. In fact, there is a serious case to be made for not visiting on those particular days.</p>
<p>As for taking on significant student debt, I just read a review of the I-Pad, where the author loved, loved, loved the product but said he couldn’t afford to buy it because he has to pay back student loans. It is hard for our 17 and 18 year olds to wrap their minds around the compromises that they might have to make later on because they chose the more expensive school now.</p>
<p>I think you need to decide first if the school is one that you can pay for. It would be worse to visit on accepted student day, fall in love with the place, and then decide it’s unaffordable.</p>
<p>I agree…why torture the kid with a dream school that he will not be able to attend? Often a second visit to a realistic choice, particularly during Accepted Student Day, will bring additional attractions to light that weren’t part of the initial visits. My D warmed up to her safety school remarkably between the first and third visits!</p>
<p>Thanks everyone. I’m definitely feeling that way, too. There’s just that inkling of, maybe the better fit is found at x school. And honestly they are not better schools at all, just had great comfort vibes, if that makes sense. </p>
<p>I’d like to cancel this weekend’s A/S Day, to visit the one that makes the most sense, and hope/pray he says, ‘Yes, this is it!’ But, if that doesn’t happen, we’ve given up the opportunity to re-visit during those ‘roll out the red carpet days’, which may not be the right days to go back? </p>
<p>In the end, we’re still left with the decision between good private school with fair aid package, and inexpensive [wink] state school with no aid at all. For that we are definitely balancing the overall quality and worth of the education vs the extra loans required. We’re definitely leaning towards the private, given it has many plusses both with his major and opportunities.
Thanks again for your great advice.</p>
<p>Massive borrowing is a bad idea. If you can visit the places that are financially reasonable without going into debt that’s fine. The fact is, most kids can be perfectly happy at more than one school. If you can’t afford to visit, he can still explore the schools in greater depth via phone calls, exploring the web site, etc.</p>
<p>mamabear and sk8termom, that’s so true about the torture… We were in the middle of going back and forth with one school about a merit scholarship and were extremely hopeful based upon our conversations with the school. We went to the Accepted Student Days, talked to professors, discussed attending some classes in 2 weeks, etc. and then the other shoe dropped. I received an email two days later telling us that they could not offer the scholarship that they had hoped. Now my son wants that school and is even telling people…sigh. So, the next visits will have to really wow him, I hope. The FA at the other school has not ruled out adding more FA to his package, but my husband thinks that perhaps only a gesture will be made, still keeping it as one of the most expensive schools.</p>
<p>As you have competing offers in hand, you may have some leverage. If a less economically viable school indeed is a higher choice, approach them sincerely and tell them the numbers you’re dealing with. Stress to them how excited your son is and what he can bring to campus. If they want your son badly enough, they’ll dig deeper. GL</p>
<p>Thanks for the advice. We are going to bypass visiting the schools with the packages that do not fit our budget, and visit the others first. We have already been to them, so if we need more info or feel the need to return, we will call them. We are also waiting for one more school’s final decision on financial aid, that could really stir the pot if it is close. Thanks again, everyone.</p>
<p>Do you think there is something special that you would learn about these schools by visiting a 3rd time? I am sorry to hear that the top choice cannot offer the merit $$- that stinks. If you can handle the EFC, then let it stay in the running. If not, then let your s know ASAP so he doesn’t continue to pine away for it. Its a disappointment, but he will get past it and will love wherever he lands.</p>
<p>Seems to me, and this is a gut observation, that the issue of revisiting and revisiting multiple schools after admission is a relatively new phenomenon. I am a big believer in not causing more problems than we solve. If you can get schools to reconsider their FA package that makes them affordable, great. If not, don’t add to the stress-- take the ones that are not doable off the table. Your s will be sad but will understand. Good luck.</p>
<p>I agree. However, my ds got a rejection email from his top choice and a waitlist from another school WHILE he was visiting a school where he was accepted. He’s afraid his negative emotions about these denials may have colored his feelings about the school he was visiting at the time, so he is considering a revisit there. I think this is perfectly understandable.</p>
<p>The school he may revisit is within reach financially, though. He does not plan to visit the ones that are unaffordable.</p>
<p>Sorry to hear that LGreen. That really would be upsetting for anyone. Even the weather makes a difference…if you visit a school on a glorious fall day, it’s so different than a yucky, gray, rainy spring day…I’m glad this weekend’s forecast looks good! When we returned to one of the favored schools last week, we did not yet know about the financial piece, and honestly are still waiting to hear. It was an incredibly beautiful day to visit a school, on the ocean! I wanted to go there!</p>
<p>So this weekend it’s urban visits…spring urban can be pretty dirty, as the streets have yet to be cleaned in the city, but I’m hoping the campus will be spruced up at least. The street trash and litter in Worcester around Clark can be really gross…and since you often have to park and walk, you really notice things like that.<br>
Wish us luck!!</p>
<p>My son was accepted to two private schools that we decided were not affordable. He did not visit either of them…why get interested if it’s not doable? I can’t think of any reason at all why one would want to do this, unless you really do think you could possibly afford it.</p>
<p>You might want to launch an appeal if the doability is a close shave. There is a recent thread on appealing financial aid awards in the parent forum.</p>
<p>BTW, the “if they really want your kid they will pony up” thing is not true in many cases, especially for need-only schools.</p>
<p>I guess we just wondered if ‘doable’ changed if we felt that the fit was better, would ‘worth’ [and more loans] make sense. With our older son we were incredibly blessed by the fact that his first choice, also offered the best package. This time around it’s been much different, being in the B student college group. </p>
<p>As it is now, we’re focusing on the manageable, with an outside hope that one school might change their offer, in case my son is underwhelmed by his other accepted student day schools this weekend! Either way, he can make it work at any of the more affordable ones, we were just very surprised at how little was offered at the mid-tier schools for students like him. C’est La Vie!! :)</p>