<p>Hey there! Happy New Year from Alaska! May you all have warm hearts and homes for the 2006!</p>
<p>Blessings all around!</p>
<p><em>sprinkles diamond-sparkly snowdust and trails Northern Light streamers through the bar. Even under the apparently missing rug...</em></p>
<p>~Mom of 1</p>
<p>momof1, you make me want to hug a baby seal! :) We rang in New Year's brunch with Mimosas and Rachel Ray's Scramblewiches (scrabbled eggs and pastrami on baguettes with melted cheese on top) and a yummy Caesar salad. SluggyD goes back to college, tomorrow. And, SluggS goes back to high school for the last 5-1/2 months of his high school career. </p>
<p>I get absolutely giddy when I think about not going to...omigod, I'm already starting to forget what it's called...jeez, whatever they call the registration week at the high school, when everyone looks like they're lining up for the firing squad...they have some cutsie name for it. It's three "S's," like Signups, Schedules, and Sex...no, that can't be it, although I saw one of D's classmates making out in a hallway one year. Oh yeah, "SALES." There are many other words that I can think of to describe the experience, all starting with the letter, "S." School Sucks Scrotums (H thought that one up). School Scrapes Scabs (another one of H's). Or, just plain old, "Shi*<em>y Shi</em> Shi*. I don't know who thought it up, but they need to change their motto to, "Give Us Money." Put it in Latin so that no one really understands...Tribuo Nos Viaticus. :D </p>
<p>It's only the second day of the New Year, and I've already sunk to a new low. So much for my New Year's resolution! :)</p>
<p>Sluggbugg--I was just finishing up my New Year's Greetings letter today (never get it done in time for it to be a Merry Xmas letter), and I was wondering, do you write an annual Xmas letter? What's it like? Can I get on the list? Same questions to Curmudgeon and Doddsdad!</p>
<p>And Wow, I had no idea that Sluggy H was so, um, creative . . .</p>
<p><em>chuckles</em></p>
<p>I woke up New Year Day under a table in Sinner's Alley, covered in confetti, & stale champagne, streamers caught between my toes... Now washed off and with a virtuous glint in one eye I am looking for Angel's Alley, you know, the place with the virtual gym....the perfect place for people like me whose brains & bodies have a diconnect....I can IMAGINE lifting weights, pirouetting on my toes, running along a beach in soft white linen, the wind blowing in my hair...sadly, the truth is I am just about out of breath typing this.....oh yeah I want the gym with mirrors that make you look tall and thin.... :)</p>
<p>Welcome, BHappyMom! What an addition you are to our little den of debauchery. (I know you've been here before, but I was probably engrossed in my Pity Party at the time). Angel's Alley indeed! Perfect for me. I do predict it won't have <em>quite</em> the visitor count we get here in SA. But a lot of us will <em>intend</em> to go.</p>
<p>I recommend you offer special promotional rates this week. We'll all show up and make you rich with our good intentions. Sign us up for the full 12-month program. Then you can spend your profits here where the virtual drinks add neither calories to the body nor confusion to the brain.</p>
<p>Thanks jmmom! Great Idea. (rubs hands together in anticipation of immense lucre) and Virtual Liposuction and Plastic Surgery just down the hall...(pins on plastic name tag Dr. Happy...) heh, heh, heh.... :D</p>
<p>Missed the New Years party</p>
<p>We spent the evening with friends watching a movie and eating gourmet popcorn. DS was out with friends, said he stayed up till 5 AM and slept where he was till around 1 PM. Was not aware of the party plan. Hope you all had a good time, whether you remember it or not.</p>
<p>Mstee -- No, we can't top the Christmas letter we get from H's father, written by his cats. It's the most senile thing we've ever read, and each year, he manages to top himself. Real cats wouldn't lower themselves to writing a Christmas letter, except to ask for more Fancy Feast minced turkey, marinated in savory gravy and served in Waterford. :)</p>
<p>BHappyMom -- Sister! You've come to the right place. For two Corona Lights, I'll push you around the jacuzzi in a SpongeBob SquarePants inner tube with cucumber slices on your eyeloids. (That's spa talk for muscular eyelids.) :D</p>
<p>slugg, your kids are doomed with pet freak genes on both sides! :eek: At least the cats eat turkey!</p>
<p>My junior high S cat sits for a couple that never had kids, just cats. </p>
<p>Strange relationship. She gives my S directions as thick as "War and Peace". He is required to refer to what in in the litter box as "fecal matter" and nothing else.</p>
<p>They are so strange that when the talk about cats being neutered in front of the cats they refer to "having their tonsils out." Need to find out what premed programs they attended, then add them to my "do not recommend" list.</p>
<p>But no kitty Holiday newsletter...</p>
<p>A newsletter written by cats! Geez, my family is so boring. What do the kitties say? C'mon, give us a hint--I'm dying of curiousity! We wish you a Merry Fishmass?</p>
<p>M&S Dad, "having their tonsils out." LOL.</p>
<p>m&s dad, OMG!!! The question is not what premed programs they attended, it's what current meds are they on?</p>
<p>Special for m&sdad and slugg: TRUE STORY: I can't figure out why I did not tell this earlier-- oh yeah; probably blocked it!-- My father actually took his beloved dog to UC Davis to get him a vasectomy instead of, er, "having his tonsils out" at the local vet. </p>
<p>My Dad (who I guess really, really relates to slobbering Labradors) couldn't bear the thought of his canine familiar having a "tonsilectomy." :eek:</p>
<p>Evildog & Viriledog, yep! That's my family of...</p>
<p>Or a Gin, anyone?</p>
<p>There is always this option for the sensitive pet and pet owner:</p>
<p><a href="http://www.neuticles.com%5B/url%5D">http://www.neuticles.com</a></p>
<p>When I first heard of this, I thought it HAD to be a joke!</p>
<p>My son's first job at 10, and a kindly relative printed up business cards for him: Cat Sitter, Caring is my Business. It might have been his first business, but it was also his undoing. He lost a cat.</p>
<p>Overseas,</p>
<p>Lost as in "ran away" or "pushing up the daisies/what we have here is an ex-cat"?</p>
<p>Lost but later was found. But you can imagine.....</p>
<p>What I wouldn't give for a Caring Cat Sitter!! I'm thinking of getting a cat door ...anyone have experiences with them? DS was shocked, a hole in the door! AND I know I would find corpses of small rodents littered about, but I have a soft spot for the old hunter...</p>
<p>Um, yeeeeeah. In the first place, I would never name a dog, Buck. Around here, that's just asking for it. Secondly, I'd never be so bored and nut-crazy that I'd invent artificial pet nards! :eek: </p>
<p>I had to go to the sizing chart and the price guide. Oooo, pictures and diagrams! Custom-made jingleberries for Fido will run you $899 a pair/each...I don't get that. Does that mean that you still pay $899 for a single, but it's even more customized? Like, it has racing stripes, or it glows in the dark, or it picks up podcast public radio when the dog walks? All good ideas, by the way. </p>
<p>It is important to note that the Ultraplus neuticle is "...not gel filled or saline filled- but feels almost liquid." What in God's name does that mean?! Feels to whom? The dog? The guy who spends his time investigating these things? Add that to my "do not recommend" list.</p>
<p>That website is a riot, m&sdad! :D <a href="http://www.neuticles.com%5B/url%5D">http://www.neuticles.com</a></p>
<p>I had to pick myself up off the floor! "Allows your pet to retain his self-esteem."</p>
<p>And the merchandise! I know what's going on my Christmas list next year.<br>
The book: "Going, Going Nuts!"
The bathrobe/t-shirt/hat/barbecue apron: "It's like nothing ever changed."</p>