@Newsy I think every family has their own reaction to the coverage. But at this point, I’m fairly tired of the extra coverage. Seems like most of us are.
In our experience, the school has been VERY on top of everything given the age of our daughter (13/14 yr old) with any relationships with boys. I’m sure things fall through the cracks- some kids are more secretive and don’t trust grown ups. But from what we have experienced, SPS was very involved in my DD life and because of her age we had to sign a lot of extra parental consent forms, had constant emails about her social life or got phone calls. Kid found it all “very intrusive” btw- To be clear- none of it was instigated by us. We talk weekly with our kid, and are fine with her choices. But the school has their own policies and concerns (ie boxes to check- Romeo/Juliet Laws, even with friendships) My point in writing this is to illustrate how maybe things are changing…
I respect the victim for taking control of her life… let’s leave it at that.
@copperboom - so you mean the school calls you to tell you who your dd is hanging out with, how she is spending her down time, etc? Is this particularly in the case of students with boy/girlfriends (romantic). Interesting. And what do you have to sign - do all parents sign this paperwork? What is a Romeo/Juliet law?
A very simplified answer: a clause which allows for a reduction or elimination of criminal penalties where at least one party is under the age of consent, the difference in ages between the 2 parties is close, and the act was consensual. The precise definition varies by state. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Statutory_rape#Romeo_and_Juliet_laws
^ this. They worry about a 2 -3 year age gap or any student under the age of 16 in a serious relationship. My DD is not dating but her closest friends are not 3rd formers which has caused some issues- especially when some of them are boys. And no, SPS has not called every time she has had a date to a dance or gone out with friends. But rather when they see “strong” friendships forming when there are age gaps greater than 2-3 years. ( thus Romeo/Juliet Law) Our take away is that SPS is having to be SUPER diligent because of Labrie case- btw my kid is not a crazy, wild kind- imagine a girly, bookish, math geek- would rather watch a black/white movie or dr who than go on a date!
I hope they are spending equal time counseling the boys. My daughter was one of the youngest in her high school even in 10th grade. She had boys in her advisory that were 6 years older than her. Her advisor (male) spent a significant amount of time talking to the kids about dating and relationships. He specifically warned the boys that girls her age were off-limits because, regardless of how they feel, they cannot legally consent.
Know the rules/laws of your home state and the state your child goes to school in. They do differ from place to place. Make sure your child knows the rules. Actually, boarding schools DO make this clear to students but repeating and reinforcing is always helpful.
Points worth mentioning:
A female can be guilty of statutory rape as well. It’s not just older males who are having relationships with younger students.
In the case of SPS, even before the Labrie incident, students were quite aware of NH's statutory rape laws and the school informed students of such. Some people choose to ignore rules and think they don't apply to them and/or are just bad people.
and to complicate Issues… its not just hetersexual relationships. I’m not sure what is happening on other campuses, but SPS has a healthy mix of LGBTQIA relationships. Laws cover those as well-
My son received a football summer workout schedule. It seems like its intended for upper classmen as it references workouts that have been performed during the school year. It’s pretty intense and contains a number of “advanced” lifts, etc. Is this something everyone that registered for football receives? Is anyone else on this board a football player or parent?
@HMom16, my friend wrote, “I don’t remember DS getting anything like that his first year. Maybe they are trying to step up the program. The boy hasn’t been recruited for football has he? That would obviously be different. DS was given workouts in following years and Varsity arrives early in September to practice.”
Thanks @GoatMama ! I’m not sure what it means to be recruited at SPS but his post-waitlist contacts were all football related. The football coach led the effort to convince him to come after he got off the waitlist and his tour guide was a football player. He’s 6’3" (at 14) and has been playing since 1st grade. His local team hasn’t lost a game in 2 years.
I set up some training sessions with my crossfit coach. He also coaches high school football players and can teach my son the lifting, etc.
Well, it looks like he will be playing Varsity as a freshman, doesn’t it!
One thing: In our experience with a different sport, freshmen who will be playing Varsity as freshmen still arrive with the other freshmen (September 8 this year), not with the returning Varsity students (September 5 this year). However, in our sport, DD as a Varsity recruit was allowed to participate in summer training off-campus with the Varsity team.
@GoatMama My son would be thrilled to play Varsity as a freshman, even if it were just special teams!
I think I will email the football coach regarding pre-season as we are planning a family vacation so it would be good to get clarification. I don’t think the football team does any specific off campus summer training but will ask about that also. Thanks, again!