<p>I think you've hit on something profound here with this idea of "what do they want from us?" In my opinion, it is the very obsession with this idea of "what do they want me to do" that leads to the downfall of many applicants.</p>
<p>I'm overgeneralizing here, but imagine two different types of applicants:</p>
<p>One set of applicants, who really want to attend Stanford, are overly concerned with what Stanford is looking for and cater a lot of what they do (their activities or their essays, for example) to what they believe Stanford is looking for and neglect the fact that Stanford really just wants to see who you are and what you're into. </p>
<p>Now, imagine the set of applicants who haven't been doing things simply to get into Stanford. These kids have instead done interesting things that they've actually cared about (asking themselves "What will I get out of this experience/Is this something that I will like doing? instead of asking themselves, "How will colleges view my involvement in this activity/Is this something that colleges will like to see me doing?"). When this group crafts their essays, they show who they honestly are and don't really think about what specifically Stanford is looking for.</p>
<p>When you look at these two (again, admittedly very overgeneralized) types of applicants, which would you rather have as a classmate? I would say the second set. Why? Because these kids genuinely care about something. When these kids get into college, they're simply more likely to continue with these activities that they've become passionate about. These kids are more likely to add something to the Stanford community than the kids who did what they thought colleges wanted them to. Simply put, once the first group of kids gets into Stanford, what is there to keep them motivated? For the second group of kids, they have that passion motivating them, and this passion won't disappear simply because of a college acceptance.</p>
<p>And so this (did I mention that this is an exaggerated and overgeneralized? ...because it is...) example could help explain the situation you described: someone who is unconcerned with getting into Stanford gets in and thinks "wow, I wasn't expecting this, I only applied there so my parents would stop bothering me..." while someone who has been wanting it their entire life gets rejected and is left wondering "what more did I need to do?"</p>
<p>So is there hope for that first (yeah, yeah, you know by now: it's an unrealistic, overgeneralized example) group? Yes. Yes, there is hope. It's OK to want to go to Stanford. By no means am I saying that wanting to go to Stanford automatically makes you a reject -- I've talked to plenty of my classmates who claim they've wanted to go to Stanford for as long as they can remember. </p>
<p>So what does Stanford want? I think the take-home message is this: DON'T be overly concerned with what Stanford is looking for. Take this as much as life advice as college admissions advice: Do things that you like and do things that you find fulfilling. If you do these activities and truly, really care about them, you will be able to easily write about them passionately in your essays and easily come up with examples that show your passion. And as an excellent byproduct, you'll be satisfied with what you've accomplished, even if you don't get into Stanford.</p>