Stepfather's responsibility

<p>I am remarried and earn about half of what my husband does. His income (and investments) put us in a position where I do not expect to receive an affordable EFC. Don't get me wrong, I appreciate his earnings and savings and the security this gives me, but my husband is not going to be contributing a penny to my daughter's education. This will fall to me and my ex.</p>

<p>So, two questions:
First, does anybody know the FAFSA logic for holding a step-parent responsible in the EFC calculations rather than a biological parent? It seems nuts to me.</p>

<p>Second, has anybody ever been in a situation like this and called colleges to explain that the paper wealth in a marriage is a lot more than what is in the mom's actual pocketbook? If it helps, my husband and I do have a detailed prenuptial agreement specifying that my husband is not responsible for my D's college expenses.</p>

<p>Input welcome!</p>

<p>The logic isn't that the stepparent is responsible for the college tuition. The logic is that the step-parent's funds are used to support the family, so more of the parent's money should then be available to put the student through college. If there is no stepparent, FAFSA has to consider that the single parent's income is necessary for all living expenses (housing, food, utilities, etc.) A remarried person has additional funds available for those expenses.</p>

<p>That's why I don't think that contacting the colleges will do anything, but it doesn't hurt to try.</p>

<p>Agree with Chedva. Imagine a situation where mom's second husband (the stepfather) is incredibly wealthy, lovely home and all, but mom doesn't work at all and spends her day redecorating the lovely home...the neighbors would think it was sort of unfair for kid to get free ride because mom has no income.</p>

<p>Here's another situation...divorced mom lives in lovely home with an incredibly wealthy guy to whom she is not married. That would lower the mom's EFC a bunch, right? Yikes! Do I see a marriage penalty here? To me it seems that the contractual obligation to educate the children is between the natural mom and dad, not mom/dad and step. After all, my husband put three of his own through college, and while I can see that I should pay more for college because I don't have head-of-household status, it does seem unreasonable to me to make step-parents responsible for educating kids who aren't theirs while the natural parent is out of the picture FAFSA-wise.</p>

<p>The FAFSA only considers the income and assets of the family of the custodial parent. This includes any stepparents. The calculation is for an expected FAMILY contribution (EFC), and the assumption is that any income and assets of the step parent are contributing to the custodial family where the student resides.</p>

<p>Well, theoretically, the rich boyfriend could kick the mom out of his lovely home tommorow, but it's a bit harder when they're married. Grandparents can also be supporting the mom and her kid but that's also pretty much invisible for financial aid purposes. You can always show the financial aid office evidence that your husband does not, and legally does not have to, pay living expenses for you or your daughter.</p>

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You can always show the financial aid office evidence that your husband does not, and legally does not have to, pay living expenses for you or your daughter.

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<p>However, most schools, especially schools that give out large amounts of their own insitutional aid will not take this into consideration. Most colleges will give FA based on income and assets of the parents (and stepparents if one of the natural parents have married). They do not consider pre-nups and court orders stating that ex-spouse only has to pay $"X".</p>

<p>When a person remarries, the college looks at to what extent the natural parent has "benefitted" from the marriage. As others have stated there is an expectation that the new spouse is contributing to the household expenses (putting a roof over one's head, food, utilities and other bills, etc) meaning that a part of the money the parent once paid by themselves is now reduced because there is a shared expense.</p>

<p>for example Dartmouth states:</p>

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<p>Divorced or Separated Parents
Legal agreements notwithstanding, we believe parents remain morally responsible for their children’s education. We consider a student’s application incomplete until we receive all the required forms from both parents.
We realize that there are many complex and sensitive situations involved, and we try to be as helpful as we can in assisting students who are often caught in the middle. For example, if the custodial parent has been remarried for many years and includes the applicant as a dependent on tax returns, we may be able to determine the financial need without expecting a contribution from the non-custodial parent.</p>

<p><a href="http://www.dartmouth.edu/apply/pdfs/0607_Financial_Aid_Handbook.pdf%5B/url%5D"&gt;http://www.dartmouth.edu/apply/pdfs/0607_Financial_Aid_Handbook.pdf&lt;/a&gt;&lt;/p>

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<p>We are in this situation too. Stepparent has voluntarily offered a contribution.</p>

<p>Hi. I am a stepparent and will be in this situation soon. It is not that I am unwilling to help. I am, but to have it affect aid is unreasonable. In our case, my husband - the father - has two children. One will go to college in a little over a year. The mother has decided to work a variable income, part time ‘job’. That in and of itself is unfair. The mother has a college degree, has worked in the past, but has decided to ‘adopt’ this lifestyle where she make my husban pay maximum support, plus some and does not work. Now that I’m in the picture she came after us for more money. She tried to use the same justification that the financial aiders do – that he can pay more because I have lightened the load. Fortunately the courts do not agree with her. It is funny though that financial aid determiners can get away with it.</p>

<p>This is a choice you are making. You are choosing to marry a person who has children that will soon be attending college. In the college’s eyes, your husband is “benefitting” from you having an income and he is not carrying the load by himself. </p>

<p>The parents are the first payers of their children’s education. When you marry someone else’s parent, your income is counted in the equation whether it is for federal aid or institutional aid. Where do you think that the institutional aid comes from- other people’s parents. So essentially you are saying that someone else’s parents should pay to send your stepchildren to school.</p>

<p>If you feel that you and/or your husband should not pay for him to attend a school that gives out institutional aid, then your step children should be looking at schools that only require the FAFSA. This way they will only look at the income and assets of their custodial parent. </p>

<p>Another option is having your stepchildren look for schools where they can get merit money without having to give financial information from non-custodial parents. Another option is that you can always wait until his children have graduated college then get married (however, keep in mind that if they attend law school or med school, those schools will still require information regarding your income and assets).</p>

<p>In many cases you can choose the custodial parent for the FAFSA form.</p>

<p>The custodial parent is the one the student lives with more. You can not just choose which one to report.</p>

<p>*it does seem unreasonable to me to make step-parents responsible for educating kids who aren’t theirs while the natural parent is out of the picture FAFSA-wise. *</p>

<p>If you’re looking at FAFSA-only schools, then this conversation may be for naught. Most FAFSA-only schools don’t give much more aid then just gov’t aid…often not much. If you’re looking at the schools that “meet need” they often require both parents and all step-parents’ info.</p>

<p>*but my husband is not going to be contributing a penny to my daughter’s education. This will fall to me and my ex.</p>

<p>So, two questions:
First, does anybody know the FAFSA logic for holding a step-parent responsible in the EFC calculations rather than a biological parent? It seems nuts to me.*</p>

<p>since it sounds like your ex is going to contribute, then unless your second H makes a lot more than your first, what’s the big deal? And if your second H makes a lot more, then you probably can devote more of YOUR income to pay for your child’s education. </p>

<p>those who remarry and their new spouses make a lot of money have a LOT more flexibility with what they can do with their own smaller incomes unless each spouse keeps finances separate and pays 50/50 towards all household expenses. But, if your H is paying most of the housing and other household expenses, then in effect, he’s helping you pay for college.</p>

<p>I agree with Chedva 100%:</p>

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<p>I am speaking as a remarried woman. My husband has no responsibility to pay for my children’s education, but his income does make more of mine available to pay tuition.</p>

<p>The college uses the FAFSA and other tools to determine what the bottom line is, which takes a custodial stepparent’s income into consideration. HOWEVER, when the custodial parent is divorced, then the divorce agreement dictates who is obligated to pay what. THAT is the only place that obligation is determined - the agreements and the court system.</p>

<p>“First, does anybody know the FAFSA logic for holding a step-parent responsible in the EFC calculations rather than a biological parent? It seems nuts to me.”</p>

<p>Note, December 31, 2007 is the date of the OP’s post as are Chevda’s.</p>

<p>However, the question was raised again a couple of days ago, by a new poster, hence the responses.</p>

<p>You could divorce this husband for college aid purposes, but be sure to factor in things like health insurance premiums, difference in income tax situation with dependents, and whatnot. It might be a wash.</p>

<p>Personally, unless the new spouse was generous and crazy wealthy, it is often better to delay re-marriage until children are well into the senior year of college.</p>

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I could be wrong, but doesn’t FAFSA consider 100% of the step-parent’s income? If so, it could be a lot more than just “freeing up” the other parent’s smaller income.</p>

<p>For example, if the birth parent makes $10K and the step-parent makes $250K, the birth parent’s entire income would be available for college, but their EFC will be much larger than the birth parent’s $10K. This kid will be full-pay everywhere.</p>

<p>That’s true…probably no way to get around that either. Maybe since they consider that families should use past, present, and future income to pay for college, they also feel that the future is indefinite!</p>