<p>Probably gay and Canadian </p>
<p>@Jan lmao</p>
<p>Doing politics in Yale</p>
<p>Future Bos-Wash Corridor Puke (BWCP). Will start off being Senior Attache to the Assistant Secretary of the Department of Bureaus (Administrative Division), eventually run for Congress, win, never leave office, and grow out their butt. A lifetime of making six figures for shuffling papers around, finding new ways to restrict economic freedom, and deciding how other peoples’ money will be spent, they will convince themselves that they are but humble public servants, working for the common good. Yes, I might have a bias or two here.</p>
<p>Computational science (this is a tough one, as I believe only one university currently offers it).</p>
<p>That guy in “Office Space” who goes through pages of code reprogramming bank software for the then-expected Y2K disaster…plus stares at his desk.</p>
<p>alchemy</p>
<p>Full Metal Alchemist</p>
<p>Chemistry</p>
<p>serving 15 years for having a meth lab</p>
<p>sociology</p>
<p>At least go for something like psychology…</p>
<p>Psychology</p>
<p>^good luck competing for a fast food job with a billion other similar majors</p>
<p>Mechanical Engineering w/USCG 3rd Assistant Engineer License</p>
<p>^Needs a fancy license/major to compensate for lack of social skills</p>
<p>International relations/economics major</p>
<p>Wants to work for the World Bank and solve all of Africa’s problems. Will wind up making them worse.</p>
<p>Financial engineering (put some effort into this one).</p>
<p>What the hell is Financial Engineering? </p>
<p>English Major</p>
<p>Unemployed because the financial models taught before 2008 don’t work after 2008.</p>
<p>Materials Science</p>
<p>Non-existent</p>
<p>Biochem major</p>
<p>Understands nerdy biology pick-up lines and actually thinks that they work.</p>
<p>Media Studies</p>
<p>Unemployed but submits reviews of media on the internet every day.</p>
<p>Bachelor of arts in mythology</p>
<p>Will own and operate a comic book store one day, and slowly morph into a living breathing “Comic Book Guy.”</p>
<p>Hospitality.</p>
<p>Will end up in Nursing.</p>
<p>Biochemical Engineering</p>
<p>Biochemical Engineering: premed but will be denied to medical school because of his low GPA </p>
<p>Nutritional Science</p>
<p>Probably going to work as a Health Education teacher teaching middle school</p>
<p>Mathematical Physics</p>
<p>Sees life with numbers, and makes corney jokes that no one understands. </p>
<p>Hotel Management at Cornell.</p>
<p>hotel front-desk person.</p>
<p>Wildlife Biology</p>