Just wishing to clarify since the converation has turned a bit. In no way in my initial posts was I criticizing his host for her actions. I believe I was quite factual. Certainly one hopes when their student goes abroad and chooses a family homestay over an apartment that they will come to be a member of the family. It doesn’t always work out this way. But for clarity, I have not criticized her actions in any way and do appreciate what she has done.
I do, however, hold the program to some accountability. My frustration with the program is due to lack of communication. The handbook outlines the program’s safety protocol and states: “Prompt Communication - Whether your student falls ill or there is an incident in a city where you have students studying, you can expect to receive prompt and concise communication from us”. So, yes. I am frustrated that communication failed and I believe I had a reasonable expectation that they would be on top of this and communicate with me. I am fortunate that my son didn’t rely on hearing back from the program and found a local doctor and took control despite being in significant pain. He managed to take the metro from the doctor to the hospital while in significant pain, communicate despite not being fluent, and handle this as an adult. I also am thankful my son did well in the surgery and was able to communicate with me that he was in recovery. But just because he is an adult, and can manage this, does not mean that he should have had to. We had a reasonable expectation that should a health crisis emerge (and i’m pretty sure this qualifies) that the program would support him. Again from their handbook: “In addition to support during an emergency, our staff members at each of our locations also help students with any day-to-day needs, such as finding an English-speaking doctor or assisting them through an illness”. My hope in discussing this with them is that they will perform better next time.
Additional note: I still have not heard from the program.
Feel free to debate whether one has an expectation of a foreign host or program, but I believe my postion on both is now clear. ;0)
I’m confused, as in post 9 you wrote that you were in communication with the program which had a rep on the way to the hospital to be with him during surgery, and that his home stay mom took him to the hospital and was waiting until the rep arrived. Maybe that was not the case?
No, I said that I heard a rep was on the way. Heard this from my son. I have not heard from the program.
Son tried to reach them twice on Friday with no response. He contacted them again on Saturday morning on the way to the hospital. He then heard back. The rep did in fact go to the hospital, but never communicated with me, and didn’t alert me that my son was out of surgery etc. So a conversation with them is warranted. Perhaps the handbook meant that parents could expect prompt communication b/w program and student? I sure read it as parents could expect prompt communication.
Oh dear, I think that might have been a cultural problem as well. The privacy laws in Europe are much stricter than in the US. If an adult is able to communicate, as your son apparently was, I’m not at all sure it is legal for the program to contact you directly regarding his health there. Anyway, glad it all worked out for the best and a speedy recovery to him.
Re: host “parents” - I do agree that this instance falls in the “it would’ve been nice” category, not the “grounds for complaint” category - and I think there has been a generational shift in this regard as well. So many people in our (the parents’) generation had those kind of “lifetime bond” homestay experiences, and I think study abroad programs continue to capitalize on the rather sentimental reputation of these arrangements, when the contemporary reality is more often quite different. My daughter heard a lot of lukewarm stories about Parisian homestays and opted for a student foyer instead, and nothing she has heard from her program peers in homestays has given her a moment’s regret. To be sure, the occasional person still hits the homestay-family jackpot, especially within programs that cultivate their own homestay relationships. But most turf the placements to large local organizations, with hit-or-miss results. (And to be clear, I’m not even counting OP’s homestay as a full-on “miss” - it actually sounds like it’s solidly at the baseline of meeting basic expectations, whereas I have heard stories of situations that are difficult and stressful even under normal day-to-day circumstances.) I would also guess that large metro areas like Paris have a lower percentage of old-school, family-style homestays than more remote or rural settings.
But yes, the program. They have an obligation to set expectations, and they clearly have not met the expectations they unambiguously set. If they had said up-front, “You’re on your own outside of our office hours”… well, I think most students and families would then take additional steps to put a more robust local back-up system of their own into place. This program put this student at risk by creating a false sense of security, and that is a real problem. What if he’d been just one notch sicker and unable to handle things on his own as well as he did? As I said earlier, I would not only be taking this up with the local program, but I would also be having a very candid conversation with the home institution. US colleges and universities evaluate the programs they choose to work with carefully, and it’s important for them to know what their students are experiencing abroad. (And, pressure to improve from the referring institutions probably carries more weight than feedback from individual parents.) I would also make sure to include this experience in an Abroad 101 review at the end of your son’s program. It’s not a matter of bashing the program; it’s helping the next person to be forewarned and forearmed.
I’m so glad this all turned out okay. Kudos to your son for the next-level Adulting under difficult circumstances. (And to you for pulling together your cavalry-coming-over-the-hill expedition to back him up!) I hope he has a wonderful experience from this point forward!!!
As a side note, I hope your son can take you sight seeing. To avoid tiring him you might want to have him show off how well he uses the buses (pack of tickets is €14, each ticket can be used for one hour so you can hop on and off if you know where you’re going). Better than the metro because you’re outside!
So glad you were able to go.
Not cool on the program’s part. Someone clearly dropped the ball.
I think people should read up on what GDPR is before posting.
I am pretty certain OP’s son has listed who is his emergency contact. I know I have that on all of my airline profiles.
This clearly states they were supposed to get in touch with the parents (or guardians), not the student. If there was an issue with privacy then they would have had the student to sign a waiver.
When my D was studying abroad in Europe, and with the same organization in South America, she had a local representative of the study abroad agency who she could contact by text anytime, day or night, for anything from language or cultural questions to medical emergencies. I think there was also a second person if the first one couldn’t be reached. When she got very ill I’m Europe and needed medical care, she never had trouble getting in touch with this person. She also had very clear, detailed instructions for where and how to get medical care in her program handbook. It was never necessary for me to contact the program or them to contact me, and she didn’t need hospitalization, thankfully, so we never had to test the system to that degree. I do agree that OP should contact her son’s program, and his home institution and express her concern that he didn’t get as much support as was warranted in the situation he found himself in. It might benefit future students.
For other parents who have students who will be studying abroad, have your student read carefully through all the information the program provides, particularly on how to handle emergencies, and ask to read through it yourself. When my daughter was ill it came in very handy that we both knew where to find the relevant information.
OP your son handled a miserable situation really well. Hope he recovers quickly and can enjoys the rest of his study abroad experience with good health.
It is not related to GDPR, so again, read up on it.
If a waiver was require in order for the program to contact the parents then it would have stated as such, but clearly it was not in the handbook.
Often host families don’t get paid anything. Also, often American kids who stay with foreign host families may not be as respectful towards them or their idiosyncrasies. I heard of both sides from my kid who did Chinese language studies. I heard of a host family kicking out the American student because they felt they could not get along. Or some kids have a hard time obeying the restrictions or rules.
(pack of tickets is €14, each ticket can be used for one hour so you can hop on and off if you know where you’re going). Better than the metro because you’re outside!