<p>There seems to be a new trend in the college search and selection process in our little corner of New York State. I've now heard of three cases in which parents have proposed to buy their son or daughter a car right after their 16th birthday in exchange for a commitment from the student to promise to only look at colleges within commuting distance. In one case the student was told he had to agree to go to the local community college. In the others there was a little more latitude given, as long as the college was no more than one hour away from home.</p>
<p>I've been a little bit surprised at the positive reaction this news has generated among many parents; a lot of "Gee, I wish I'd thought of that!" comments and so on.</p>
<p>Is this sort of thing happening in other parts of the country? Or is this a local tick, sort of like the way natives in these parts say "I seen" instead of "I saw." It frankly sounds like bribery to me, and bribery that may well limit their children's futures. On the other hand, I recognize the financial savings the parents will be realizing over a 4-5 year period. What do you think?</p>
<p>I don’t get why? Is it to keep children closer so they can live at home and save on room/board at college? Or to keep them closer because parents don’t want to miss them if they go far away? </p>
<p>I think it isn’t playing fair to ask a 16 year old to limit their future. I think the shiny new car in the immediate future would pull at them and then 2 years later that car will have some scratches and dings and the child realizes it wasn’t worth it…</p>
<p>I wouldn’t make that kind of deal with my child.</p>
<p>Jamiecakes – In the case of the three families I know, one wants their daughter close to home because they want to delay as long as possible the “break-up” of the family, while another wants to save money. Don’t know the reasoning of the third. I would also note that none of these families come from poor or lower middle class backgrounds. All of the parents are college grads and their household incomes (all with two working parents) are between $100,000 and $200,000.</p>
<p>I would never get my teen a car, unless there were some really important reason to do so. In fact, I did not get my teen a car, because educaiton is more important to me.</p>
<p>I bought my son a car, but we live in Houston and there’s no reasonable college choice in the city (not considering UofH or Rice$$$). However, I think it’s funny that my parents made that deal with ME over 25 years ago. I don’t think it’s anything NEW!</p>
<p>This has always been a deal. Not necessarily for the 16th birthday. Friends of ours gave their D a choice of commuting and a car or boarding at the college. She chose the car. I don’t see a problem with such a deal. Cars at college are risky with some kids.</p>
<p>I seem to recall offering my daughters a car when they turned 16 if they’d keep their rooms clean for a month or somesuch, but at the time they were in preschool. The entire idea sounds unenforceable, anyway.</p>
<p>Reminds me of a high school friend who, musing on the difference between our public flagship and a nearby selective private school, said that either one could go to PrivateU, or one could go to PublicU AND buy a fancy sports car at the end of four years. That particular tradeoff possibility hasn’t changed at all for a full-pay family. The friend went to the private, I went to the public: I seem to be missing a Ferrari.</p>
<p>There is a possibility that my next son will be one of those kids who gets a car if he boards. A school he really likes is limited in dorms and encourages those who commute to do so, and they offer a “commuter’s discount” off of the tuition. That amount would be a nice amount towards car costs.</p>
<p>H promised our girls new cars at graduation if they were successful at obtaining a certain % of schoalrships.(I thought he was nuts!!!;)) Both of them hit their mark. We are now hunting for a new car that is safe and very good in the snow for D2. Any suggestions??? No geographic limitations placed by us but both will be within a 6 hour drive from home.</p>
<p>Seems safer to me to have the kid live in the dorm and no car freshman year. Already I am getting gray hair over her driving! More importantly, I her to go where she thinks she will be happy, wherever she can get in (provided it’s within our price range).</p>
<p>The only way I could possibly relate a car to college choice is based on finances. If she goes to Expensive Private or OOS U, we can only afford a used car. If she chooses instate, or Expensive U with Nice Aid Package, then a new car is a possibility. If price were no object, she would get the car regardless.</p>
<p>As I posted earlier, one area college offers a tuition discount of about $6K a year for commuting. I know kids who have good part time jobs or other opportunities where a car is important in order to get there in a timely matter. </p>
<p>I love Subarus. They have all wheel drive all of the time.</p>
<p>From the description it’s bribery of a 16 y/o who may well not be in the frame of mind to make a sound ‘decision’ to forego college opportunities for the immediate gratification of having a car. I think it’s a counter-productive practice and the two decision points, having a car, and selecting a college, should be segregated.</p>
<p>Unless it’s absolutely necessary I don’t think it’s generally a practical idea for 16 y/o to be given a car (as opposed to being allowed to share in the use of a family car). If nothing else, that car may end up sitting still taking up space in the garage or driveway, depreciating and deteriorating for some years while the kid is at a college where it’s not allowed, impractical, or too costly to have there.</p>
<p>We did pick up a third (used) car when oldest started driving. She drove it for 2 years, now the second kid will drive for 2 years (they will have to share it this summer), then the third will be driving it in a few more years. No one will have the car at college.</p>
<p>Oh, and it is a Subaru, we have owned them for 20 years, but that did not stop her from skidding off a snowy road and into a tree!</p>
<p>I do think that 16 is too young to make this kind of agreement. Why not wait until the student is a senior in high school? I don’t understand this rush to get teens on the road the minute they turn 16 unless circumstances demand it. Between insuring a teenage male and the stats on teenage drivers, no thank you. Plus, you may not need to offer the car.</p>
<p>When my niece was 16, she was determined to go out of state and they offered the car as a bribe to stay instate. It turned out that their instate honors program had a terrific program in her major and she was very happy to go there. Her folks tried to wiggle out of buying her the car but then she got a full ride plus stipend. We were all relentless about it until they gave in and bought her the car!</p>
<p>Hudsonvalley,
I’ve never heard of this before. It sounds like maybe the parents aren’t ready for the kids to leave home. The income level of the parents doesn’t surprise me. I know of one family in this income level who told their kid that they could not pay tuition at the local college (tuition about $8000 and no room/board because she would live at home) and that she would have to go to community college. This kid does have a car, but I don’t think it was part of the decision making process.</p>
<p>Our neighbor recently offered her kid a similiar deal. She is a helicoptor mom of the highest order. </p>
<p>Her S1 went two and half hours away to flagship state u. He got a car when he was 16. He is soph. now and she has yet to go more than two weeks without seeing him. She has never gotten over his leaving home.</p>
<p>Her S2 will be a freshman next Fall at the local state u. (maybe 10 miles away). He wants to live in the dorms for at least one year. He got a fairly late model car when he turned sixteen but she has now (according to her DH unless he was kidding) offered to replace that with a new car if he will stay home and commute. So far the kid has not given in.</p>
<p>Sorry to go off topic, but my husband is a helicopter pilot and everytime I hear this term I think of him in his flight suit, flying around the ceiling of our house watching S while S makes the classic teen “leave me alone!” face. Or my husband in his helicopter, hovering over S on his walk to school yelling things down like, “DID YOU REMEMBER YOUR LUNCH?” It makes me laugh everytime.</p>
<p>Frankly, I’m surprised that his woman’s S2 is going to college so close to home. At least it’s good practice for setting up boundaries.</p>
<p>“There seems to be a new trend in the college search and selection process in our little corner of New York State. I’ve now heard of three cases in which parents have proposed to buy their son or daughter a car right after their 16th birthday in exchange for a commitment from the student to promise to only look at colleges within commuting distance.”</p>
<p>That has long occurred in my city including such exchanges being offered by college professor parents to their own kids. Truth is that if one plans to live where I live, going to the hometown public will give you more contacts for jobs than would Harvard. Mine is a city in which people get ahead through personal contacts – preferably people whose grandparents were born and raised here. I learned this the hard way after moving here…</p>