Taking Time off For Health Reasons

<p>We are in contact with the class dean; thank you, and thanks to all for the well wishes.</p>

<p>Adding my thoughts that I hope your daughter recovers quickly.</p>

<p>Ditto to all the practical advice - contact Dean, figure out policies etc. And after all of that is done…Be mom, with all the nurturing, emotional chicken soup, pillows and blankets on the couch that the position entails. I’m assuming your DD is 19-21, she has a long long long life ahead of her. The academics, the pressures and the expectations can all be set aside, whether she graduates at 22 or 25 - who cares. Breath and let the healing happen and worry about the rest later.</p>

<p>PG…</p>

<p>Prayers for your D for a full recovery. </p>

<p>.</p>

<p>(((Hugs))), pizza.</p>

<p>I took a year off from campus due to major medical issues. I ended up doing online courses and working on getting my gpa up during that time.</p>

<p>Echoing the thoughts, prayers and best wishes for as speedy and uneventful a recovery as possible, PG. So sorry to hear that your family is going throug this.</p>

<p>Pizzagirl, sorry your daughter is dealing with this. I am sure that for privacy reasons you do not want to divulge more, but I think that responses may depend on whether this is a chronic, ongoing situation, or something acute that will be over once treated.</p>

<p>One of my kids has taken two medical leaves in 4 years, one mid-semester and one before the semester. Naturally, when she left mid-semester she lost all work done.</p>

<p>Both leaves ended up being great experiences, once she had recovered fully enough. I will PM you.</p>

<p>Sax, it is good to have tuition refund insurance. Also, if a kid has a chronic condition, and first seems well enough to return, then has a relapse, that is the nature of some fluctuating conditions and I would get MD’s involved, and even a lawyer, if the school did not understand that. Although colleges at this point need only make “reasonable” accommodations, many are very good with these situations. Taking a leave before the semester starts seems to earn good will, since it doesn’t cause the school and administrative disruptions or money. (Some schools require you to reapply if you miss more than two weeks of classes, so leaving midsemester could mean reapplying!)</p>

<p>Taking a medical leave versus a personal leave may have some benefits ultimately, in terms of deans, disabilities offices and other administrators being more aware and informed about the student’s situation. For instance, in securing accommodations such as a single room or reduced course load. Just a thought.</p>

<p>Socially, coming back can be tough in some ways, as is the extra semester or more spent at the school after her own class graduates, but many people take leaves of various kinds and it may eventually provide a chance to meet new people, and to be a leader.</p>

<p>Hugs to you and your daughter. S1 has just finished a year off for medical reasons – he was dx with ADD and transient depression (as in, a result of the ADD spiral) and I must say it has been a very positive experience. It has given him the chance to regroup and restore. Try to be supportive, all the time, of the extended timeline it creates. There really isn’t any hurry to graduate, and school will wait; it is immensely easier to get better when you aren’t managing school as well. (S2 has a chronic, serious physical illness, so we know about health!) Good health is priceless and often an overlooked part of the academic equation. When people would ask if he’s graduated “yet” --I love the judgement that implies-- I just smile and say “Not yet. He’s a work in progress”.</p>

<p>I agree with Deitz in post 23. </p>

<p>Take good care of the whole family, and listen to the advice of the medical folks handling the health issue. They will be a guide as well.</p>

<p>I join those wishing your daughter the best. This is a detour in her life journey.</p>

<p>pizzagirl, what does your D want to do? A friend’s D was diagnosed with a serious illness right after law school graduation. The only thing that made her burst into tears was when one doctor suggested that she not take the bar exam this summer. Another doctor (who had survived the same illness) assured her that she could study for and take the bar during treatment. She completed the bar a couple of weeks ago and is awaiting results. </p>

<p>All this is to say that while keeping an eye out for rest, nutrition, etc., let your D be as active as she wants to be.</p>

<p>Hugs and support, pizzagirl. This is not an easy road, the whole freshman year. </p>

<p>D’s best friend withdrew from all her Spring classes and went home. She’s been seeing a therapist. She’s going back to school this fall. </p>

<p>In the scheme of things, taking some time off is the best road. I hope she can find a way to fill her time because she’ll probably feel better if she’s engaged and learning.</p>

<p>Most important thing is, she’s alive and okay. And has a caring mom.</p>

<p>My kids biggest concern was that she was falling behind her peers. This made her feel like a failure. She could not accept that it was okay not to be on the same time clock as her friends.</p>

<p>That was five years ago. It took the passage of time for her to realize that she gets to set her own rules. That there is not only one path and one time table towards success.</p>

<p>Wishing you and your daughter well, pizzagirl. Sending healing thoughts her way. I have a good friend who left in the middle of her sophomore year, took another year off, and graduated just a year later than originally planned.</p>

<p>Pizzagirl, I’m wishing you and your daughter the very best of everything.</p>

<p>My D was at a private school in Pennsylvania when she became ill, had surgery with complications, and wasn’t medically cleared to return to school in the fall semester. She did, however, take a couple of classes at our local college. Found she liked it there, made good contacts and could do a better job of preparing for her chosen field and decided to stay. She never returned to the first school. It worked out for her because she did amazing internships that wouldn’t have been possible otherwise, but to be honest with you, I don’t think it was a particularly good choice. She was worried about the classmates who had moved on without her and she was worried about not being really ready for the rigor of living away while going to school from a health perspective. </p>

<p>It was a very difficult and painful time for us and, much as I hate to admit this, it was personally devastating to me because I felt that I had failed her when she chose not to return to a residential college.</p>

<p>I’m so very sorry to hear that your daughter is having health problems. I will hold both of you in my prayers.</p>