And sometimes it all works until it doesn’t. As I mentioned above, they thought they had the sleep regression sorted out…and it’s back. He seems to go down at night without much fuss but he gets up really early (like 5:30am). Naps are a battle and he usually wins because really, how long can you let him cry. A “sleep consultant” (really, that’s apparently a thing now), suggested some techniques that seem to me to be Ferber in another form, but what do I know. Apparently my S told his brother that if someone had told him he’d have hired said sleep consultant a year ago he would’ve told that person they were nuts…now he just wants some sleep and to come home after work to a not-exhausted 14 month-old. We’ll see how it goes.
Even with all that it’s been a joy to watch GS develop and grow. He does things he knows will make the grown-ups laugh, loves to play, and is generally just wonderful to be around, unless of course you want him to sleep! He pulled me to him the other day and just puckered up and gave me a kiss. I almost burst into tears.
I think D came thisclose to paying a sleep consultant, except she plain doesn’t have the money. But she kept saying–why is what they’re doing such a big secret? Can’t they just write a book?
Maybe they don’t, because it would basically just be Ferber in another form.
Be that as it may, I sure hope this progress takes hold, because D needs to work, and needs the baby to take naps, go to sleep, stay asleep, when she’s not there.
Picking up an ‘extra’ weekend with DD and GKids. Will see how much GD is progressing with sleep and catching up on other things Taking full advantage of living close, as that won’t go on for much longer, based on SIL’s career…
Ok, guess I can join but not that happily. D15 is expecting a boy March 31. She only has 6 hour of college credit, not in school, has severe depression and other mental issues, and is not married or financially secure. She considered adoption but as of today she has decided that she really feels she can raise the baby. She is finally on meds for depression, has a part time job that will lead to full time after the baby comes (is training as a dog groomer).
The dad wants to do the right thing but honestly doesn’t know how to. His upbringing was awful. He is a welder so has potential to earn a decent living. He is working but I’m not sure how secure the job is. Big problem with him is that he has a DUI hanging over his head. He can’t afford to pay his lawyer. Not sure how all of this is going to play out.
For now D is living with us. We told her this is not a forever thing. We will help but have her brother’s college bills to pay so can’t pay everything and we plan on retiring and moving in 5 to 7 years.
Luckily friends gave her a beautiful convertible sleigh bed crib and are giving her lots of really nice hand me down clothes. We have a responsible person to keep the baby when she works when it is really little and then have a deposit on a very nice day care for after that. I’ll keep the baby if they both work on Saturday. I said to not try to get an apartment or anything until we see how the DUI plays out.
Just want to reassure the far away grandparents with my experience…my D grew up with my parents very close by and saw them at least weekly. Other grandparents , 2-3 times/year. D is 19 now and is much, much closer to the grandparents she saw rarely. They’ve always done a better job of staying involved and plugged in on a deeper emotional level than the nearby set. Proximity isn’t everything and when your grand babies get old enough, texting and FaceTime are wonderful.
I agree with @momofsenior1 — my sibs live in HI and my kids saw them often. H’s sibs live(d) in SF, so my kids didn’t see them nearly as often. They developed close bonds with H’s sibs—several closer than my sibs whom they saw much more often. Proximity is nice but t isn’t everything.
You’ve posted about this situation before. I’m sure you’re upset–and have a perfect right to be. But DO look on the bright side, so far as you are able to do so. I know it’s hard.
While on Face Time with my 15.5 month old granddaughter, she wanted to see our dog; she loves all dogs and chases them at the park. Once the dog was on the screen, she ran to get a ball and tried to give it to him through the phone! She is now learning to tickle and tried to tickle one of her aunts through the phone.
It is so much fun to watch her change, even it by way of Face Time. We go visit for a long weekend the beginning of March; I can not wait. I also get to see my daughter’s 7 month old this weekend. I hate not seeing them more often, but we make the best out of the distance between us.
I do not remember staring at our 4 mo old D’s features- fingers, eyes, nose like I do with GD’s. She’s fascinating. I was probably too sleep deprived to notice or remember anything.
We’re down to the last two weeks of waiting - DD’s due date is 17 days away. I can tell she’s really tired of being pregnant but a little apprehensive of the whole labor and delivery thing (why do people always feel obligated to tell pregnant women their birthing horror stories?)
Oh well - one way or another, our grandson will be here soon!
We’re down to the last 2 days. DD is due on Thursday. Fingers crossed for a non-scary and timely delivery. I’m at the point where I don’t go anywhere without my phone clutched firmly in my hand.
@Mansfield - We were at a concert on DIL’s due date. I sat there with my phone on vibrate, on my lap, and checking for texts after every song. She actually went into labor a few hours after the concert.
@rockymtnhigh2, My D recorded herself singing to GD. When all else fails, I play it and she does stop crying. I also use the front carrier and GD is calm while ‘riding around’ with me.
I am blessed to have D and her family living so close. We love every (well, almost every) minute we get to spend with them. We are part of their weekly lives. It is very easy for D to have us around a lot, but we are very careful to give them family time when SIL is around. He works A LOT, and D (works about 10-12 days/nights each month) is very grateful that we are here for support.
I posted a few weeks ago about GD’s sleep issues. Family has made a lot of progress. D is finally able to leave her in the crib for naps and leave the room. Hopefully she will not get into the habit of lying down with the next one for naps. GD is also accepting being put down awake at night. Huge gains for D in terms of time and feeling less trapped, though I guess a lot of crying to get to this place. All seem to be surviving the transition, though.
Today went with D, S and GD to the Bronx Zoo (SIL was working, so D got her brother and me to come along–didn’t take any persuasion, really!) and we had the best time. GD had some closeup animal encounters and was just so much fun! And getting time to spend with all three of my progeny was priceless!
@Mansfield, hope you don’t have to wait too long! And @garland, glad to hear the sleep training is having its desired effect. Our GS goes to bed at night, in his crib, with no crying but nap time is still a real problem. Even the pediatrician says he’s probably under-slept because he only sleeps 10-11 hours at night, if they’re lucky (7pm-5/6am). He’ll sleep is he’s laying on someone or if he crashed on the couch but if you put him in his crib he can wail for an hour.
My DIL was out of town this past weekend and S brought GS to stay with us. Morning naps found us listening to him cry for 40 minutes before he gave up but in the afternoon it just never happened. My S really would like to get inside that little head to figure out why he quickly figured out that his crib and sound machine (they live in NYC) and no lights means bedtime at night but that even though he’s falling on his face tired during the day, he’ll fight it to the end.
I just got back from a 4 day visit with 7 month old GD. While not the dream visit I had hope, I was glad I was there. My SIL will be out of town for week, so it was a good time to visit and help out a bit; not that my daughter can not take care of the baby alone, just helpful to have an extra set of hands.
By Friday both my daughter and GD had colds and the baby, who usually sleeps 12 hours at night, was up crying a good part of the night for two nights. As she has had two double ear infections since Thanksgiving, my daughter was sure that was what was wrong, so off to the pediatrician we went. Ear were clear, and nothing obvious was wrong, so most likely virus. Sunday night after Benadryl, both mom and baby slept! I left Sunday late afternoon; wish I could have stayed longer, but to change my flight and deal with work would have been a huge hassle. My daughter was so glad to have me the days I was there to help hold the baby.
Tonight I get a frantic call from my daughter; the baby had an allergic reaction to eggs and they were heading to the hospital. My daughter has food allergies, so she was trying the common allergens first in her feeds. They had a late start due to her being sick so much. The baby also has a good bit of eczema, so we knew there was a possibility the baby might have allergies; we were hoping she wouldn’t. They spent a few hours in the ER and are now home. Another sleepless night for my daughter as I know she will be checking on GD often during the night. I have been there before so I know she is worried.
Taking full advantage of living close, as that won’t go on for much longer, based on SIL’s career…