“The only thing worse than being talked about is not being talked about.” - Oscar Wilde
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I’m not sure I understand your point.
In my opinion she had every right to roll her eyes, shake her head in disapproval, look disgusted or disappointed or uncomfortable. That is not getting physical but is also not laughing off a comment that was received as hurtful and inappropriate.
When discussing this with friends, there are a lot of “ifs” being brought up. IF CR knew about her condition the comments take on another dimension. IF WS had not been as impulsive and had used words to express his displeasure and bring awareness to the struggles of living with medical conditions and the need to show more empathy. IF there’s past bad blood between the Smiths and CR was he poking the bear? If, if, if… it would be such a different story. And we the public will never know the full story, nor do we need to.
I’m in the camp that CR’s comment must be taken in context of his knowledge of her condition or lack thereof. That extends to anyone in the Academy who may have known what he planned to say. Did he rehearse or was he instructed to ad lib some shout outs/roasts to random audience members? If he didn’t know, why hasn’t he spoken up and apologized for being uninformed?
I wasn’t watching the Oscars live so was aware of “the slap” before I saw the footage. I’m another of the uninformed who did not know of JP-S’s Alopecia and would have interpreted his comment as a bit awkward shoutout to a strong woman a la GI Jane or a legitimate reference to an upcoming sequel. Until I saw her reaction and then my thought would have gone to a poor taste comment about a woman’s appearance.
I wish I’d followed her story a bit because I’ve seen photos and marveled at her beauty and confidence with her style choices. I still marvel at that but even more so now knowing the reason behind it.
I felt pretty neutral about WS before this moment. I’ve liked some of his work but definitely not all. When their kids became public figures years back I read some things that made me question WS & JP-S parenting choices but hey, what do I know about the lifestyles of the rich and famous and how accurate were the published accounts anyway?
I don’t understand how anyone can defend WS’s physical assault on CR. I don’t understand why the Academy allowed him to receive his award and make that self-aggrandizing speech. I can only guess they were in shock. The standing ovation was a sad moment. Maybe also because everyone was still processing?
Anyone choosing a public career and life needs to be somewhat thick skinned and able to ignore a certain amount of ribbing, but there needs to be a line. I hope somehow this will lead to more awareness of taking care with one’s words. But I’m afraid it’s going to normalize physical reactions to (perceived?) verbal assaults. And that frightens me for all of us as I’m the first to admit I’ve spoken carelessly at times… but the moment I realized I’d caused harm I apologized!
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I don’t fault the producers of the show. This is live TV. Can you imagine the spectacle of maybe dragging an, up until that point, widely loved black man off camera? He’d already hit this guy on stage; they don’t know what he’d do next if they tried to take him away. What if there was a scene and they couldn’t go back on air? It’s easy to say now what they should’ve done, but that was a LIVE, volatile situation.
I’m guessing they will let him keep the Oscar and won’t let him become a member of the Academy (or take that away if he already is, but I don’t think he is). They won’t let him present next year or ever.
About the standing ovation … I think people were in shock and lemmings and went along with the crowd. I bet a bunch of people regret standing. And, again, it’s easy for a Jim Carrey who wasn’t there to cast aspersions now. In the moment, it was shocking and unprecedented. And, yeah, at first I thought it was a joke.
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My point is that someone said some in the thread are criticizing Jada for her reaction to the joke - no one has done that here.
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Also, I may be wrong because I didn’t watch it live - didn’t this occur later in the show - like 10:30 EST? So one, wouldn’t have affected the ratings (up or down) and two, by the time a team gets pulled together (during a live show!) to make a decision, maybe they think just right out the last portion of the show than cause MORE ruckus?
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@Youdon_tsay and @abasket
Good points about it being later in the show. Since I wasn’t watching live I completely forgot this was nearing the end of the show. That could definitely have played into both the Academy and audiences reactions and lack of reactions.
I actually said, " less of a rush to judgment on how JP-S should have taken the “joke”.
Please also see my other post if you’re not sure what I mean by that:
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I have always despised “humor” that is founded in making fun of physical attributes. I remember way back in the day when Joan Rivers was on a campaign to milk every laugh she could by making fun of Elizabeth Taylor’s weight gain. I could not believe the cruelty and that people found this satisfying. She could actually be quite clever and entertaining when not going after people. Don Rickles was another who I just could not find funny at all. It just seems like classic bully behavior. “Oh, come ON! It’s just a joke!” as they skewer and humiliate. “Man, you are thin skinned! You’re famous so you have to take whatever they dish out!”
There are so many funny comedians that manage to do great sets without once making fun of someone’s body or general appearance. Making fun of someone’s weight or hair or lack of hair or big ears, etc. seems like a very cheap laugh and evidence of a lack of creativity.
The more I read about this, the more I am coming to believe CR was not doing a Joan Rivers here. But in following this thread and a lot on Twitter and other internet sites, there are a whole lot of people who think that there should be no boundaries whatsoever, no low too low, as long as one calls themselves a comedian, and that any push back on that kind of humor is a call for “no jokes at all.” Such black and white thinking.
This will all blow over soon and I doubt Will Smith will suffer consequences of any significant nature. I also do worry for the safety of stand up comedians as a result of this complete lack of action on the part of the Academy Awards producers at the time it happened.
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Word on the street
The claim is that the joke was not in rehearsal, that the writers wrote the joke on the fly. And Chris Rock didn’t see the joke until he read it off the teleprompter.
If true, what the heck was Will Smith doing? It makes no sense whatsoever. His reaction makes absolutely no sense.
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He is
So true! I do get that some people are very thin-skinned but some jokes are rude. I find that kind of humor unsophisticated and I feel like it caters to the lowest common denominator. But, like I’ve said before Will could’ve taken the high road and handled this differently. He did not have to stoop down to Chris’s level.
Will Smith committed a crime. Chris Rock didn’t.
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Assuming those are Academy writers, I could see the CYA scrambling going on right now. And perhaps its PR machine is preventing CR from speaking out about it? Or his PR machine? (musing away over here)
ETA: If that is true, the Academy should own up and apologize to CR for putting him in that position. I suppose there could be legal implications for involuntarily causing his assault. Hmm
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True. I just meant that Chris Rock’s joke was a low blow, but Will could’ve taken the high road
Will Smith could have stayed in his seat! It was clear enough from his wife’s reaction (and surely they knew eyes and cameras would be on them when Jada’s name was mentioned) that she was unhappy and didn’t appreciate the joke. That’s the kind of thing you do when you don’t appreciate something a comedian says- groan, roll your eyes, shake your head, etc.) They could have said more after the show if they still had a beef with what Chris Rock said. Will Smith’s reaction (overreaction)was absurd.
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So absurd that I totally understand why so many people thought this was a skit at first.
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I certainly thought so at first!
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It was a low blow IF Chris Rock knew about her condition (which he says he did not). Otherwise, it was a comment on how she rocked the “look” and actually a compliment.
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I honestly thought he was complimenting her. The way he started with a smile and an endearing comment. And that she looked good with a shaved head she could do the movie.
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“Oh, it’s no big deal. GI Jane was a strong, awesome, beautiful woman!”
GI Jane had a healthy head of hair and her decision to shave her head was HER DECISION.
Alopecia is a devastating condition. You aren’t asking for it. You aren’t making a statement of strength. You are INFLICTED WITH IT.
In my mid 30’s I experienced an episode of telogen effluvium. This is an episode of diffuse, sudden hair loss. I had long, lush, thick, beautiful hair. In fact, when I was younger and the style was straight Cher Hair, I really hated my hair, because it was so thick and uncontrollable. By the time I was in high school, it had calmed down and I was often called a “Brunette Farrah Fawcett.” Seeing my hair fall out in handfuls was absolutely terrifying. Call me vain, I don’t care, but I know 99% of women would have felt the same.
I’m betting that men go through tough times when they lose their hair-in fact, I’m sure of it. But big difference: NO ONE stares at a bald man, whispering to their companions “Oh My God, that man has no hair!” It’s normal, it’s expected, it’s common, and in recent years, seen as kind of sexy.
No one calls bald women sexy. So don’t try to normalize or minimize this. It’s absolutely devastating for women.
When Jada Smith first began to experience alopecia, she was devastated as well.
“I’ve been having issues with hair loss,” Pinkett Smith, 46, said in her latest “Red Table Talk” webisode which focused on “body confessions.”
“It was terrifying when it first started. I was in the shower one day and then just handfuls of hair just in my hands … It was one of those times in my life that I was literally shaking with fear.”
She continued, “My hair has been a big part of me. Taking care of my hair has been a beautiful ritual.”
She may well have made peace with this. But I have no doubt if she could have her luscious hair back, she would grab it, embrace it, and sob with the joy of it.
Don’t minimize the hurt she must have felt at being made fun of for it in front of 16 million people-no matter that she says she doesn’t care what people say-I guarantee you she felt the burn, whether or not CR realized the impact of his words or not.
There is no human mandate to make “jokes” about peoples’ suffering.
This has NOTHING to do with Will Smith. He is guilty of assault, no excuses, no justification whatsoever.
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