This Is Us. Anyone watching?

The cabin thing has been confusing all along to me. From Pittsburgh, there would be places within an hour or so. But, they all seem to be getting there from multiple locations with no problem. And people seem to be n LA and Philadelphia now . Where IS this cabin location?

My assumption is near Bradford, PA.

I guess thatā€™s possible but that is 3 hours from Pittsburgh, 5 1/2 hours from Philadelphia. I grew up in Pittsburgh. More typical places to have a place were 1 to 1 1/2 away. Laurel Highlands, Conneaut, Pymatuming, etc. Deep Creek pushing it at 2 hours away. But who knows what the Pearsonā€™s were up to!

I think that itā€™s been established that the parallel universe in which the Pearsons live has Pennsylvania the size of Rhode Island. :rofl::rofl:

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Cliche on the surface. But what other option was there? Kevin is a mess so he isnā€™t an option. Randall is a drama queen. And he pushed for clinical trials, treatments, etc that he wanted for Rebecca. Didnā€™t ask what she wanted. To me you pick someone who will advocate for what you want not what they want. Randall isnā€™t that person.

If I have to pick a Pearson to be in charge of my end of life decisions, I would pick Beth. Could be used as a reason to pick Randall but I think he would override/fight Beth too hard.

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Well, Kate has her own issues. I would not underestimate who may step up, including Kevin or Randall.

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My mom has dementia and, at this point, could have a similar conversation.

I, too, would have picked Beth.

The flashback with Miguel leaving set up why Rebecca chose Kate: in her time of distress, kevin panicked, Randall tried to fix everything, but Kate was able to just be still and be with her.

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No doubt Kate has issues. I just think on balance she is the best choice given the 3 options.

In terms of who may step up, Randall and Kevin arenā€™t off the hook. At least I wouldnā€™t expect them to be. Picking Kate just means that assuming Miquel is not around Kate makes any final decisions as to Rebeccaā€™s care. Randall and Kevin will still be involved. Still can help with doctorā€™s visits, care, etc. Given Kevin is building the cabin where he and Rebecca will apparently both live (or at least spend significant amounts of time ā€“ why else would you ask about where third-party caregivers will live?), I expect that Kevin will be more involved in day to day care than will Kate living on the other side of the country. Even with the Pearson time machines at the ready. :slight_smile: Someone had to be picked because its how those things work. You canā€™t make it majority vote.

In terms of the cliche itself, most of my friends within the past 25 years or so have dealt with aging parents (some of us are still doing so today). And in the cases of families with at least one son and one daughter and in which I know who is in Kateā€™s position, I would say 70-80% of the time its a daughter. Same is true with elderly parents moving in with a child. Much more common its a daughter (even when a son is an option).

And this from a son (who has a sister ā€“ who is and always during her existence has been the parental favoriteā€“and 2 brothers (one of whom as the oldest was at one point the favorite)) who has healthcare/financial/trust power (now just over my dad but before her death my mom as well). My sister and I pretty much handle everything but its more a function of distance than anything else. Parents built a house less than 5 mins from sister. And hour from me but multiple hours from brothers. I havenā€™t made (and do not intend to make) any decisions unilaterally. Though legally I can.

Surprising to see others say that the daughter is the natural choice. Clearly you donā€™t have a Precious Child Son in your family. My brother is the least emotionally equipped to make these decisions, but heā€™s first born and the only boy so he wears the crown.

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I donā€™t think most people are emotionally equipped to deal with this, whether son or daughter. It is tough. And many parents are living longer and longer. Giving one child the major decision making may or may not be the right decision, depending on the particular family.

Will be a shock if they are setting up Miguel dying before Rebecca.
And responding to someone who doubted her love back when M. told her he was movingā€¦just prior to that she had stepped closer to him, looking up very earnestly at him and the conversation seemed to be ā€œgoing thereā€, both having admitted that they picked on each otherā€™s dates, and then boom! I do think she realized she loved him and was devastated.

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If I am remembering correctly, Kevinā€™s son was 10-12 years old in the flash forward, and Rebeccaā€™s hair was all gray. I would like to believe this is at least another 10 years down the road, IF we can assume that was Rebecca in the bed, and that is was Kevinā€™s son that said, dad went out for food.

As Kevin and Randall are usually at odds, it makes sense for Rebecca to have chosen Kate if Miguel was no longer around.

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Are most spouses emotionally equipped to deal with this? Is Miquel? Should spouses have that authority for each other?

Donā€™t expect that Kate will be the only one involved in making the decisions. I expect she will talk with Randall and Kevin (at one point, they were not talking with each other, right?). Expect all three of them would discuss with Miquel if he is still in the picture. And they would talk with doctors, specialists, counselors, etc.

Should the Big 3 all been given decision making authority? Would all 3 need to agree? Majority? Many health decisions are not binary so what if they all have different views/approaches? Donā€™t expect hospitals/doctors to want to get involved in any of that.

I would want my husband to be the person to make decisions for me, as long as heā€™s able. if anything, to hold off my children from having to take over too much as long as possible. Hopefully, in This Is Us, the designated sibling (Kate) communicates with the other siblings, but that does not always happen. Rebecca gave no explanation as to why she picked Kate if Miguel were not around, no direction that she loved them all and hoped they would work together if It came to that, etc. But, itā€™s a TV show!

I think many people are not emotionally equipped/prepared at the onset but rise to the occasion.

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I was dying (bad pun?) to watch tonight so I could see what all these posts were about!!!

Re: picking Kate. I have two daughters and one son. Not sure who Iā€™d ā€œpickā€. Bu their sex would have nothing to do with my choice. Itā€™s their decision making abilities and handling of emotions.

Re: the scene at the table. I thought all sibs looked genuinely moved. Those were not fake tears in their eyes. Iā€™m sure that was a final season moment.

Re: Kate and Toby. I suppose I see both points. But Iā€™m just so over Kate treating Toby like dirt I canā€™t see her side so well. Why canā€™t his caring be appreciated?

Re: when Kevin told Toby to take the hat off. MIC DROP. That may be when Toby officially jumps the Pierson family shark.

I also laughed at Randallā€™s comment ā€œthe black Piersonā€™s are here!!!ā€ Lol, crack up moment. Along with Beth taking his phone.

Re: the senator calling Randall - is this a sign of something political to come???

Re: Rebecca and her mom. Her mom sure seemed young in those flashbacks. Not retirement age! But clearly something severs the relationship more because we had the scene of Rebecca calling her mom on the pay phone when the car broke down and they stayed in the hotel and she was basically telling her mom off!!!

So much to unpack this episode!!!

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Did anyone else expect Malik to be at the cabin to surprise Deja? (Deja mentioned that he wasnā€™t answering any of her texts.)

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I thought Malikā€™s lack of response to Deja, was because he was honoring Randallā€™s wishes.

Re: Rebeccaā€™s decision to select Kate, it is such a pivotal, life changing moment for Kate.
Imagine a time when Rebecca may need hospice care, and those three need to make some hard decisions.
Randall, wants to fix everything, he is fragile at times, it could weigh on him, EVEN if he wanted HOSPICE care, and Kevin didnā€™t. There goes their relationship, which doesnā€™t need any more stresses.

Kate is the rock for Kevin, clearly he is even not mature enough to even consider building space for caregivers. Again, under such stress he could snap.

The push/ pull of mother daughter, as displayed in the humorous moment when young Rebecca finds out her mother is moving.
Mother/ daughter relationship may be strained, but who stayed with Rebecca after Jackā€™s death, who empathizes with her during her sad time after Miquelā€™s announcement.

Yes, itā€™s Kate, and the writerā€™s developed that moment at the table perfectly.

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^^^^Thatā€™s pretty spot on.

Yeah that Malik texting situation seemed like a moment that will develop in the future. But if it was because of Randall, I would think Deja would have expressed bitterness to Randall - ā€œwell heā€™s not texting cause Of what you saidā€ - but instead she seems confused. Time will tell!

I donā€™t think Deja knows what Randall said to Malik. It was the conversation that Randall and Malik privately had on the front steps. Randall guilted Malik and asked him to back off if he really wanted what is best for Deja.

I donā€™t recall Malik relaying the conversation to Deja.

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Youā€™re right. Forgot about the stoop talk.