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In the flash forwards to the cabin, Kevin’s kids are tweens. His kids are only slightly younger than Jack, so that had to be before the (step)parents all get together to see him perform. So Kate was alive after the cabin scene. Unless I’m confusing timelines and the tween kids are NOT from when Rebecca dies. I’ve kind of lost hope of keeping track of the different flash forwards. I just assume it will all make sense in the end.
Which is what I would expect. Kevin presumably calls everyone. But as someone else noted, you don’t show (in the previews) Kevin calling everyone.
May be the case that Kate doesn’t get there is time. Travel arrangements from California are different than what they would be for Randall from Philly.
At one point, I remember reading stories that Metz was losing weight. Maybe, given her current weight, those were never true. But if they were true, I wonder if the writers didn’t want to include pre-weight loss Kate in the flash forwards if when we got to those times, Kate would weigh less. But again, maybe the stories about the actress’s planned weight loss were not correct.
I think that Kevin’s kids are 1-2 years younger than Jack, Jr. His son (in the flash forward tells Randall that Kevin went out to get food) is not 1-2 years younger in the cabin at the time Rebecca dies than Jack Jr is in the concert scene (Kevin’s son is more than 1-2 years younger than young Jack in those scenes). So to me, the concert is some time after the Rebecca dying scenes.
You are correct
She’s coming from LAX, not Inner Mongolia, so there are plenty of flights. And remember, Toby is already there. Kate is likely just off screen somewhere.
The reality is that children don’t always get there in time. My husband’s 2 siblings just wanted to know when it was over with their mother. My husband and I were the only family with her at the end. Not sure that’s all that unusual, especially when long distances are involved. We drove 8 hours to get there in time. My wonderful 91 year old MIL died about 3 hours after we arrived . She had been in a memory care unit for her last years. She hung on much longer than she would have ever wanted. The 6 year thing with Rebecca hit me. MIL clearly started declining at 85, but lived another 6 years. A sad, slow decline. Rebecca’s decline is all too familiar to many of us.
Can someone explain this reference from teen Kate in last night’s episode: “Your kids. Two winners, one dud. Kind of like Hanson.”
From a 2022 perspective, Isaac and Zac are duds. Or at least need to learn when to keep quiet. But since their heyday predates me, which one was the dud in the late-90’s?
But Kate’s kids are as well and they weren’t there. Why wouldn’t Kevin and Sophie just bring them? Not a big deal, just thought it was odd.
First, Kate is most definitely alive. She is seen still married to Phillip in the future. Jack is not an adult at the time of the deathbed scenes.
Also, I think the Big 3 along with Madison and her family stayed longer at the cabin. It may be that Toby was there but took the kids home. Kate may have wanted to be able to focus on her mom and the family. Randall’s kids had also left. It also may be the issue of not wanting to add additional kids of the correct ages to the cast for something so quick.
I, too, would want my kids to know that if I was that far gone, they can put me in a home with lots of visits. My cousin cared for her mother at home for several years when she was completely bedbound and immobile. She had promised her dad on his deathbed that he would never put her in a home. But it was so incredibly difficult for her. I don’t think it was a financial thing, but perhaps that was part of it.
I wondered about the Hanson reference as well. No idea who the dud was. Maybe the oldest one?
There was a band called Hanson which I believe had 3 brothers. Not sure who was the dud or why.
I had read something like “the cute Hansons got ugly and the ugly Hanson got cuter”. I think it was the oldest that was least popular - Issac?
No, I know who Hanson are - MMMBop. Isaac, Taylor, and Zac. I just don’t know which is the dud.
Is it weird that “Kevin went out to get food for dinner”?? Like was it necessary for him to be gone? Or was that a line from when we didn’t know for sure who these children belonged to?
OK, that makes sense.
Not related directly to the show or the Hansons:
I love reading everyone’s comments. It does seem like they’ve done a good job portraying someone with Alzheimer’s. I too have made it clear to my family that I should go to a facility if I ever become a burden…the part that I hadn’t thought about is, as someone loses their memory, the panic they can feel with the unfamiliar. Rebecca was completely unnerved when the nurse came in to help. It made me remember taking an aunt’s BFF in the mid-stages of memory loss to lunch with my aunt. While I’d known her since birth, I didn’t see the BFF often as I had left our hometown at 18 and didn’t always see her when I came home. I had picked her up and the 3 of us went to lunch. The aunt I’m very close with went to the restroom and the BFF looked up, became very panicked, grabbed my arm and asked, “How am I going to get home?” She was clearly frightened. I, of course assured her I would drive her home after lunch. My point is that it would be very hard to place your loved one in skilled living if you saw them becoming panicked with anything unfamiliar or even something more recently familiar (like Rebecca’s nurse who, I’m assuming, had been caring for her for awhile). Knowing you were subjecting your mom to a new place, new routines, new caregivers, etc. would make me hesitant even if that was the mom’s stated preference in an earlier time.
One of my favorite parts of the episode was the contrast of Rebecca caring for the kids when they were little and then them caring for her, particularly when Kate pushed her brothers into really seeing/touching their mom.
These episodes keep getting harder and harder.
My mom told me for years and years that she was never going to a nursing home. She told me I could take care of her better than any nurse. I told her no way, I am not equipped for that.
When I impulsively brought her to live with me and care for her, I thought she’d live a year, if that. We just started year 10.
If you haven’t yet made it 10000% clear to your kids that you do not want them giving up their lives to care for you, tell them now, and often. Put it in writing. Tell lots of other relatives. It’s horrible, as the child, to feel guilted into this situation.
I thought it was interesting when Kate made Randall and Kevin interact with their mom. As my mom’s Alzheimer’s has progressed, family members have definitely withdrawn from her. It’s really sad. The Randall and Kevin exchange stating, “She’s not our mom anymore” rang true. By the time Rebecca dies, they should have already been grieving her loss for years.
I actually found the scene with Kate pushing her brothers to brush Rebecca’s hair and put lotion on her hands a little strange. They have their own relationship with their mother . Kate to me was not automatically the best choice to make final decisions, but it is probably fairly common to pick a daughter.
The hair brushing and hand lotioning did me in.
I initially thought, to tie in with an earlier scene, that they were going to paint her nails. Now that would have been over the top.
I noted in my mind that that was also interesting because as a teen Kate seemed to avoid her mother’s touch. She was a pretty angst-filled teen.
The Big 3 did have their own relationship with Rebecca. But Randall and Kevin were focused on who she no longer was; Kate was focused on who she was at that point.
I agree that daughters are more often picked than sons for the role of making care decisions. Though not always. My parents picked me rather than their only daughter.
But for Rebecca, I think Kate was the right call. Randall would have taken Rebecca to Philly and no doubt enrolled her in various treatment and therapy programs. Torturing her in her remaining days because he just had to make things right (he struggles with the idea that its ok sometimes if things aren’t right). And you can’t pick Kevin if you are not picking Randall because they are rivals. And Kevin’s life at the time was something of a mess. Kate didn’t bring the personality conflicts into play as much and made it more likely they would come together to make a decision.
I think she also picked Kate for Kate. Kate at that point felt she was something of a screw up and had little confidence. Rebecca trusting in Kate provided Kate confidence which hopefully carried through to the rest of her life.