<p>Whatshould, are you male or female? Are you an only child? And can we assume you’re Asian?</p>
<p>This sounds like a kid who I worked with, whose parents didn’t want him to leave home and was going to take an offer at UCSC instead of Northwestern. Fortunately, the kids parents came to their senses.</p>
<p>Is part of the problem is that your parents are concerned about the drinking and party culture?</p>
<p>They might be receptive to you studying at UCSD. It has much less of a party culture than most schools. In fact, people jokingly call it “UC Socially Dead” for this reason. It tends to attract students who are serious about studying. Combined with the fact that it’s not that far away, would your parents possibly accept UCSD as a compromise?</p>
<p>You should go where you want to go, but it seems like you obviously would rather go somewhere else than UCR. Tell your parents that it’s your college and that it should be your decision where you want to go since you said that money isn’t an issue. Just because a school may be decent doesn’t make it the best for you. The environment around the campus and which area you will to live in is a big deal. Btw, not to diss UCR but it’s really incomparable to Johns Hopkins in terms of premed and the other top UC’s in terms of rigor and prestige. I hate to admit it, but prestige does often open the door of opportunity, and since you got into the upper UC’s why do your parents want you to go to UCR? If you want to debate with them it seems the best thing to do is tell them that you worked your butt off for all these years to get into the college you wanted and that it isn’t fair for them to choose one for you. After all, it’s you that is going to be going to that college and not them.</p>
<p>Hopkins, hands down.</p>
<p>I don’t know that you’d see any great difference in med school admissions if you compared people who were accepted to Hopkins, WUSTL, or similar schools and who went to those schools vs. people who were accepted to those schools and who instead went to Riverside, UC Santa Barbara, or Pepperdine.</p>
<p>I could make a strong argument that for a top student (and if you were admitted to Johns Hopkins, you’re definitely a top student) the possibilities for research and work with faculty members is probably more easily achievable at UCR or one of these other schools than it is at Hopkins with a huge cohort of equally talented kids.</p>
<p>I think your chances of pulling a 3.8 or higher average in the pre-med courses is a lot higher at UCR.</p>
<p>I think your opportunities for outside volunteer work in medically-related areas is outstanding at Riverside.</p>
<p>Riverside doesn’t have the cachet of JHU, but it will provide a perfectly reasonable place for a solid pre-med education. </p>
<p>Wouldn’t you rather save the money for med school anyway?</p>
<p>^^</p>
<p>Yes, the key is:</p>
<p><em>accepted to Hopkins</em> and then matriculating at another Top 100 school (in this case #89 I think). But UCR is a placeholder for Arizona, Minnesota, Alabama, Ohio State, Rutgers, etc.</p>
<p>If you can get 3.5 at Hopkins, you can get 3.8-3.9 at UCR. Simple as that. The adcoms will see that as equivalent. If you are that good at UCR, you’ll get your pick of research projects. You’ll get your pick of Professor recs. </p>
<p>People will rise to their level of competence, whether 60% at Hopkins of 98% at UCR. Same.</p>
<p>The danger is that you’ll play down to the level of your competition… that’s something you really need to monitor and keep setting appropriate challenges for yourself… challenges like – setting the curve in each of your classes, taking the hardest classes in your progression, getting to know a new professor well each quarter, etc.</p>
<p>I think Claremont McKenna is the best choice at the moment. It’s close enough to commute though that may get tiring after a while and it’ll take more effort to get involved in clubs. But still, it has surprisingly good premed stats (considering it’s known for social sciences) and it’s small enough to allow for the research opportunities and individual attention that a UC can’t provide. Also the culture is more laid back than Hopkins so I think I’d be happier there. And based on visits I like it.</p>
<p>Maybe I missed something here. Who is paying for this?? This is truly a stressful time for all involved but unless you are footing the bill I would be respectful of your parents help. A good person will succeed not matter the odds.</p>
<p>If that’s the place you like the best, go for it. :)</p>
<p>Well I was trying to look at the positives and my last post was rather optimistic.
But I honestly like Dartmouth. A lot. And I feel like if I go elsewhere, I’ll just be wondering ‘what if I went to Dartmouth’ and regretting. Even if the place I go is good, the opportunity cost is greater and it’ll never be more than second-best.</p>
<p>But my parents are footing the bill, and they absolutely insist that I live at home (making commuting to CMC the best option), so what can/should I do?</p>
<p>Why did they even allow you to apply to Dartmouth?</p>
<p>Why not call Dartmouth Dean of Admissions Maria Laskaris. It won’t be the first time she’s heard your story. Maybe she can have someone from the Dartmouth community reach out to your parents. As a Dartmouth parent I know my son would tell you it’s worth the fight.</p>
<p>No offense, but your parents seem overly protective/controlling. Getting away from them for college will be the best decision you ever make.</p>
<p>So much of college is the out-of-classroom experiences. There is no way you can get that living at home.</p>
<p>Blitz Dartmouth Admissions and say, Help, I want to go to Dartmouth, but I need help convincing my parents.</p>
<p>Some parents have worse separation anxiety than their kids do going off to college and fear losing control and a parade of horribles. So its about trust. Yes, some kids go off to college (whether across country or upstate) and utterly blow it with partying. But that is fewer than you (or your parents) may believe. Most of the freshman partying ends ABRUPTLY after midterms and midterm grades come out. Its like OMG! And the crack down into the books. </p>
<p>Going away to college is a great experience for most kids. Going across country can be stressful, for all involved, but it will work out. </p>
<p>I see you are also admitted (your statement) to UCLA and UCSD and Claremont McKenna. Those are also fabulous schools and would provide you with a wonderful undergraduate experience and preparation for medical school. As between Hopkins and Dartmouth…that is a matter of personal preference and the kind of college experience you want. Hopkins is an urban school in a big city. Dartmouth is very remote and rural and COLD. But both schools are excellent preparation for medical school and have outstanding med school placement.</p>
<p>To me, UCR should not even be in the picture, in the context of your other choices.</p>
<p>Its a bit strange that your parents want to move closer to UCSD and Claremont if you go there. Are they hovering and smothering you? Do they fear with you gone away to college you just might make decisions on your own that they might disagree with…as in major course of study or career decisions? They arent going to college, you are. </p>
<p>You can’t go wrong with any of your choices…but clearly UCR is at the bottom of the pack.</p>
<p>And frankly, with what you suggest about your parents, you really do need to get away and prove yourself to them as a responsible adult, no matter what you end up doing in your life.</p>
<p>Good luck.</p>
<p>OP – I commuted to UCLA for grad school from Pasadena. It was a 30 minute commute at 7am and 10pm when I would come home. There is no reason you cannot go to Claremont and simply stay there all day, visit friends in the dorms, involve yourself in student clubs, study in the library, etc. so that when you go home, you’re home to relax, sleep, and come back the next day.</p>
<p>It doesn’t work though if you need to travel to school after 7am or commute home before around 7:00pm… too much traffic.</p>
<p>Is it worth it for the family to move to Claremont?
They were planning on moving somewhere anyway and it’s a nice place to live.
Plus I’d have a way shorter commute.</p>
<p>what is your commute going to be to Claremont?</p>
<p>Look, lots of adults commute 1:30 each way to work. If you work it right, I’m assuming your commute will be less than 45 minutes to Claremont. If working adults can do it, you can do it! If you leave Claremont at 10pm, you will have missed almost zero of the college experience. What goes on after 10pm is usually a complete waste of time anyway, and usually illegal!</p>
<p>Do <em>NOT</em> plan on doing ANY homework when you get home at night… expect to get home, chill for an hour, and go to sleep.</p>
<p>After a year of commuting, your parents will probably be in a frame of mind to consider letting you dorm at Claremont anyway!</p>
<p>whatshouldido</p>
<p>I think that in your particular situation, you should be clear on what you want and then sit down and talk with your parents. If you want to go to Dartmouth, and the money is there, then sit down with them and discuss the fact that Dartmouth is one of the best schools in the country, the opportunities there are unparalled and because of the D plan, you can probably arrange to come back sophomore or junior year for six months and live at home while you do an internship, get a job etc.</p>
<p>If you feel that you don’t want to go to UCR but understand and appreciate their desire to have you near, then explain that UCR is a much worse school than some of the others you’re gotten into, it will be hard to get into a top medical school and the other students might not be of a comparable caliber. Rather than say you will live at home, I would say that it will be easier to get better grades, avail yourself of all the extracurricular opportunities and perhaps work for a professor if you’re on campus at one of the other schools in California. Then explain that you will come home 2 weekends every month and every vacation and ask that they allow you to try this. </p>
<p>I guess what I’m suggesting is that you try and come up with a reasonable compromise, recognizing and understanding their fears and concerns. I do not think that in your situation you should live at home at all, to be honest, but maybe there’s a way to make them comfortable that you’ll come home often. Claremont McKenna is a fabulous school, you will have access to all of the other colleges in the consortium and it sounds like it’s close enough to home to get home frequently.</p>
<p>Thanks for the suggestions.
They don’t understand the necessity to get out once you reach the magical age of 18. After a lot of thinking, I really don’t either. So I’m coming to terms with the commuting thing, I just don’t like that it’s forced rather than a choice. I’ve visited and lived in various places and in many parts of Europe, Asia, Australia, and Canada, moving out for college is simply not the norm. In my experience it’s a uniquely American obsession (sure some people do it in other countries, but it is rarely seen as a necessity and it’s not nearly as common). So I truly can’t say I understand the need to move out as a principle (of course if one’s college is not drivable, that’s a legitimate reason). I mean, if it were a necessity, wouldn’t all the adults in much of Europe, Asia, Australia, and Canada be dysfunctional and immature after being deprived of this opportunity to ‘grow up’?</p>
<p>I guess I would look at things differently. Even though there is no necessity or magic reason to move out, if you don’t live on campus at certain schools, such as Claremont McKenna, you will be pretty alone as a commuter. I don’t think that you’ll enjoy the school quite as much if you have to get home every night because almost everyone else will stay on campus, develop relationships, go to spontaneous late night parties etc.</p>
<p>However, if that’s the only way they’ll let you attend, I would try to attend Claremont McKenna as a commuter rather than UCR. However, I think you should really try and convince them to let you try to live on campus–you can always move back home, but I believe that you will be much happier living on campus. You seem like a very kind and good-hearted person, but maybe you should also take a little more active approach here–you’re not living in Asia or Europe and most of the best schools in the US are not commuter schools. I would really try and make my parents understand that things are different here and they will see you often if they want.</p>