Interesting exchange of perspectives and many good points.
IMO It’s a slippery slope to hold it against people who get covid, as many people are infected even if being careful and as pointed out, peoples’ definition of careful varies.
It’s a particularly good point about those who are frequently exposed like those working in healthcare, teaching, grocery stores, etc. Of course if someone has symptoms and doesn’t rapid test/mask before a big event is not being careful.
I’m sorry for all of those who have had to cancel or miss out on big events.
I would not skip a wedding because of another wedding. I am feeling very bad right now for this girl based on your description. Holding a grudge and blaming her is very sad in my opinion. Anyone of those people could have had Covid and the same thing can happen.
I feel very bad for the bride and groom but I absolutely don’t believe in blaming one person for an invisible virus.
I feel very badly for the bride and groom and their families. It’s what I worry about with my D’s wedding too; how do you handle some or all of the wedding party coming down with COVID? How would I handle it if they all got the flu or a stomach bug? Difficult situations all around. . I’m really hoping there are some better vaccines in the near future.
My daughter says she doesn’t blame the girl but the bride isn’t there yet. Honestly, csn you blame her, though? An event already delayed and planned for a long time. I really don’t know how I would have reacted but I sure understand her reaction.
Just in the last week, I know so many people who have been careful (getting vaccinated x2 and boosted, wearing masks in indoor crowds, etc) who’ve been infected with Covid. One of them got it from her college aged daughter who gave a ride to a friend who had a personal emergency and later tested positive. Two days later the daughter had symptoms and tested positive and a few days later her entire family was positive.
I get that the bride and groom are upset but it’s totally unfair to blame the bridesmaid. Anyone who is planning a wedding anytime over the next year (or the past two years) had better be prepared for this to happen. Omicron is crazy contagious and it’s wrong to blame people who’ve gotten vaccinated for picking it up anyway. It could just as easily been anyone else in the bridal party.
To answer your question, if the bride and groom continue to hold a grudge against this bridesmaid then yes, I blame them. I’m certain that bride hasn’t been 100% perfect for the past two years and it’s entirely possible she herself may have passed the virus on to others who have had events cancelled as a result. Not one of the people in their wedding party or families have been hermetically sealed for the month prior to the wedding.
Agree. You can’t hermetically seal yourself. It’s been tried and doesn’t work. I know people who mask, been vaxxed, avoid everybody and guess what? Covid. Some twice. Fact is I don’t know anybody who has been hospitalized lately (delta was a different game). It’s time to live your life. No blame games. If you want a big wedding and want to control everybody then have a zoom wedding and live in your bubble.
It’s very sad for the couple but they knew the risks. What if everybody’s symptoms started late on the night of the wedding or the day after. Guess who everyone would “blame”? The bride, for hosting a superspreader event. I’m guessing she would not be happy with that outcome. All she’s doing now is risking a good friendship.
It’s an INVISIBLE virus. Anyone can be exposed at any time. Anyone can pass it on , including the vaxxed and boosted. Maybe it was someone who was asymptomatic who started this spread. She did nothing wrong!!!
I don’t blame the couple for being upset but I do blame them for trying to pin the “blame” on someone.
Fact is, there are about 30,000+ people currently hospitalized with Covid, and about 3000 in ICU. So your anecdotal observation doesn’t quite tell the whole story. While these numbers are better than they have been, there is still plenty of risk. Same for your anecdotal observation about the effectiveness of precautionary measures. They aren’t perfect, but they do improve the odds.
As for the wedding situation, I don’t think we know enough about the circumstances reach much of a conclusion one way or another, nor is it really any of our business. It is a good example, though, of the disruption Covid can cause even when no one ends up in the hospital or dead. Not sure ignoring all the risks makes all that much sense given the minimal effort required to be a bit careful. Believe it or not, one can fully “live their life” while still being somewhat careful.
12-52K annual deaths from flu. Nobody hid. Not anecdotal observation. 140,000 – 710,000 hospitalizations and 12,000 – 52,000 deaths annually between 2010 and 2020.
I don’t care what anybody does in their own lives. But the blame game needs to stop.
Obviously the bride was well aware that her best friend was attending the wedding. She couldn’t possibly tell her not to attend (hypocritical) so to put blame on her seems unfair. There’s no guarantees during Covid.
My niece got married a few weeks ago. Small wedding, 100% outside. Still had about 8 cases afterwards, including her and a bridesmaid (her sister who was vaxxed boosted and had Covid prior) and the grooms parents who were vaxxed and boosted and very careful prior to wedding.
For comparison, 180,000 people in the US have died of COVID-19 in the almost half-year since the beginning of 2022. This is about 3.5 times the number who die in a bad flu year.
We are still consistently seeing 2/3rds to 3/4ths of those in the hospital and in ICU not being fully vaccinated or fully vaccinated and boosted/2x boosted. So the majority of those hospitalized and in ICU have made a conscious choice. Now that children under 5 years old down to 6 months are about to start getting vaccinated this week, almost everyone would have had the opportunity for some form of protection. Covid looks to be an accepted fact of life for those living in my area (only seeing a small amount of masks in crowded places and amongst elderly at this point).
Those are terrible numbers, no matter the context. But how many of those deaths were by those who chose not to get fully vaccinated or fully vaccinated and boosted/2x boosted?
That’s why 3 Sets of the kids I know have self quarantined for several weeks prior to their big days. Very very Lucky that they are remote workers. First festivities were less than 24 hrs before the wedding. The bachelorette/bachelor party were moths before. These were six figure weddings and no one was risking it. One set did get Covid the next week but honeymoon wasn’t for 3 months so not a huge issue.
Not sure how this matters in the context of the conversation above. Regardless, the impact of Covid goes beyond the deaths and hospitalizations, as the fallout at this wedding demonstrates.
Covid “looks to be an accepted fact of life for those living in my area” as well, but many are still masking in crowded indoor spaces. Not just the elderly, but also others who may come into contact with the elderly or more vulnerable populations, as well as workers, and those who see little downside with wearing a mask to protect themselves and as a courtesy to others. Contrary to the representations of other posters here, these people aren’t “hIding,” nor are they “living in a bubble.” Their quality of life doesn’t seem to be suffering much at all.
Those who do not take simple, cost effective measures to stop the spread of Covid are more likely to spread it. That’s not the “blame game.” It’s science.
Approximately 17% of eligible people in the US are unvaccinated, and they have a 6 times death rate of COVID-19 in April 2022 compared to those with at least a primary vaccination series. This suggests that unvaccinated people make up about 59% of the approximately 180,000 deaths for the first half of 2022, or about 106,000, leaving about 74,000 deaths among vaccinated people. However, actual numbers may be different due to age demographic differences in vaccination rates, or if the risk ratio between unvaccinated and vaccinated differed over time.
I am all for people making the safest most comfortable choice for themselves, whatever that choice is. But I can say for certain that there are areas of the US that are completely “pre-pandemic” in appearance. My wife and I picked up my Father’s Day meal from my favorite restaurant to go and the indoor facility was filled with around 200 people in a pretty small space with no masks on from our view. I saw the celebration in Atlanta from winning the World Series last fall and the celebration from UGA winning the National Championship and things looked pre-pandemic.
The only places that I have been recently that I have seen any regular mask wearing is at the Atlanta Airport (I would say about around 50/50 or slightly more when traveling about 6 weeks ago) and when walking in to the waiting room of my family’s primary care physician. I have also visited an area recently that still has quite a bit of people masking (Washington DC) so I know that there are areas that are taking more precautions than I see in my suburban enclave. Although your words around protecting others is kind, Covid just does not inspire the same fear as 2 years ago for a growing portion of the populace.
I think your number is pretty accurate from what I have seen… I recently read that over 70% of all of the fully vaccinated deaths since the Omicron variant hit the US were in our most vaccinated population (over 65 years of age).
I’ve been reading up on the protocol for under 5 vaccinations. I’m curious…
It seems that we learned one got a stronger immune response if the two doses were spaced farther apart. Yet, the recommendation for the under 5 is still 21 days for second dose of Pfizer and 28 days for second dose of Moderna.
One of the original arguments for keeping the dosage schedule for the adults was to get immunity to as many as possible as quickly as possible. Later we learned the immunity was more robust with further spacing.
Wouldn’t it be better to have greater immunity after the second shot - which seemed to hang around longer with longer spacings. Another 4 - 6 weeks for the second dose for the under 5 crowd sure wouldn’t make a difference in general public health. But it appears it would make a positive difference for the individual.
It’s okay to change the narrative…and follow the science
. I’m really hoping there are some better vaccines in the near future. 
