Villanova essay help

please can someone read my Villanova essay ?

So the prompt asks me to describe a relationship with someone different from me. I started by writing about how I come from Africa and I have befriended someone American, rich, athletic, and who is very sickly (those are the things that are different about us). Is that okay? And does anyone have any tips about how I can make it more about myself and less about the other person?