D has received decisions from all of her schools. She is seriously considering 4 of the schools and I think is feeling nervous about making her final decision. Due to distance and scheduling, we will not be able to attend any ‘Accepted Student’ special events at any of the schools. We visited all 4 of these schools last year on her spring break, but it was kind of a whirlwind trip (‘if it’s Tuesday this must be Clemson’ sort of thing) and we didn’t have time to really get in depth at any of them.
Her spring break is in March, and we are considering visiting the schools again. If we do that, what sort of things do we need to do and see for her to gain useful information in order to make her decision? I don’t think that she would be comfortable doing an overnight visit and I don’t think we’ll really have time for that.
First be sure the schools in question are in session when you visit.
Then call the admission office and ask what is available-- perhaps she can shadow a student for a day (without the overnight component), sit in on classes etc.
In my experience the difference between an admitted student day and a standard tour is the the emphasis on your child’s chosen major. The rest of the tour is similar though most have provided lunch in a dining hall. You can set up much of that on your own. You can arrange a meeting with someone in the college or major on your own and pay for your own lunch. You can also set up an appointment with the financial aid office if you need to. The advantage to going alone is the one on one attention you are getting. A disadvantage is you don’t often get the perks provided by the admitted students visit ie. free parking and sometimes free lunch. The typical college spring break takes place in early to mid March while most HS spring breaks are in late March/early April. Be warned however, that it will be VERY busy. Spring break is a popular time to visit for everyone so you’ll need to make your plans now.
A “due diligence” visit is very different from a prospective student visit. None of my kids attended an accepted student event, and those events seem to be geared to selling the school to students not for getting the real scoop.
A much better way is to try to organize an overnight visit and attend classes the next day. My D1 even scheduled a coffee with a professor of great interest to her. Some admissions departments will help. Sometimes your HS will give you contacts of alums who attend a given school. Sometimes you can contact an organization like Hillel or Newman or some other organization of interest to find a host.
It’s very personal and your D should be asking herself what’s really important to her. This is a great time for her to learn about herself and since she’s already been admitted, she should get comfortable with the idea that there is nothing to lose and everything to gain by doing an overnight. She will reject 3 of the 4 schools, and she should be able to make that decision with as much knowledge as she can get.
Consider working with her HS to have a few extra days off to spend more time on the visits. Or they in the same geographical area? Would it be better to make two trips?
If that is not possible, and perhaps even if it is, can she take the four and make an educated guess at top two and spend more time at those two?
We found admitted students days helpful, though not always in the ways that the schools intended. As @lvvcsf noted, the info on how majors work was sometimes very interesting, and seeing the other possible future classmates was also instructive. Four is a lot of re-visits though- I think @Sportsman88’s idea of narrowing it down is a good one.
If you think about it, it would be a surprise if she wasn’t nervous about making a final decision. The emphasis put on getting in to college, and finding the ‘right’ college has been intense, and for many high schoolers is really the single biggest decision - and most public and defining- that they will have made for themselves.
What about taking the heat down a few notches and just eliminating one? Let that settle for a few days then see if she can eliminate one more. Now she’s choosing between two- go visit those, using the suggestions above (sit in on a class, try to find students that there is some link with (HS alums, friends of friends, etc, overnights if they are on offer in the spring, etc.),
By the way, if she isn’t comfortable with the idea of doing an overnight at one or two colleges that she is seriously thinking of living at for the next 4 years (with you staying at a hotel nearby), and the colleges are far enough away from home that travel is an issue you might think about how she’s going to cope when she goes off in August/September ‘for good’. Of course, she will be 6 months older, and so perhaps ‘readier’ but you might want to look at that now. Every autumn there are more than a few students who come back to CC saying that they didn’t realize how hard it was to be so far from home, and more again in January saying the same, especially now that the excitement and newness has worn off. And that’s not counting the ones who are having actual problems at their college.
My thoughts as well. I suspect there is something deeper going on under the hood here. Rather then brushing it aside and expecting things to work out in September, it’s worth facing up to this now and giving serious consideration to whether a different college closer to home might be a better fit.
I, personally, wouldn’t worry overly if she doesn’t want to do an overnight. Only one of my kids was even offered an overnight and he preferred to stay off campus when we visited. I was a little concerned because the school was 900 miles from home and I wondered if he would have trouble being away from home if/when he enrolled. He did end up going to school there and had no transition problems at all. I think for the visit is would just have been awkward to sleep in someone else’s room (on the floor?),etc. - very different than sleeping away from home when it’s your “own” space.
It would be great, however, if she could do a day visit with a current student who could take her to class and lunch, etc. I also endorse trying to meet a faculty member in her area of interest, if possible.
Lastly, if all the important factors are fairly equal and the decision of which school to attend is coming down to comfort (dare I say fit), you may find it helpful to visit things that are “off the beaten path.” Observe the student body at lunch, passing from class to class, in the bookstore, etc. Walk through the buildings where tours don’t go, sit on a bench and sip coffee while people watching.
Good luck and enjoy this time with your daughter! As stressful as those final weeks before commitment were with my own kids, those last visits, when my future collegians really started to know their own minds, will always be precious memories I wouldn’t trade for anything.
I tend to agree that reluctance to sleep on the floor of a stranger’s room is not predictive of ability to adapt freshman year. My kids have done overnights, and didn’t love them because the whole going to sleep on the floor/futon of someone you’ve met for a couple of hours etc can be very awkward. Much different from the excitement of making a new life in college as a freshman. I tend to think the overnight can play an outsized role in turning students off and on to a school.
Visiting after acceptance is very different than before application. In the latter, the school has the power of acceptance or rejection. In the former, the student has the power, and looks at the school not as a supplicant, but with an eye, “Can I really see myself here for 4 years?” They tend to take a closer look at the student body and the “vibe” of the school, rather than just seeing buildings, dorms and cafeterias. Also, there is a lot of growth between application time and acceptance time, and it’s not the same kid doing the visiting. The school my D loved on her first visit ending up being on the bottom of the list after acceptance.
If you can swing it I think a return visit looking at things from the “accepted” glasses as @Chedva said can make a huge difference. I would see if you can arrange a meeting with a department head in her major. I appreciated the more indepth look at how the major worked and the more blunt information they tend to give rather than the glossy info presented at the prospective student visit. I am wary of the current students that the universities bring in for panel discussion on the accepted student days. They always seem to be the superstars and as a parent I would much rather hear about the experience of the average kid. “People watching” in invaluable.
I think that @collegemom3717 is on target with her advice on with trying to narrow down the number of return visits. But, we too are making 4 visits to accepted schools (2 were first time visits and 2 are return visits). It has been helpful with the two we have done so far. One school definitely came off the list and the other has moved from 6th or 7th place to 1st.
In hindsight, wish we would not have encourage D16 to apply to so many schools. Options are good except when there are too many good options from which to choose. D16 says the stress of choosing is worse than the stress of deciding where to apply and waiting to hear a decision combined.
Can she find out from her gc if there are any students from her hs attending those schools? If yes, she should contact them to get their perspectives. They are more likely to give her the real lowdown vs a tour guide or admissions officer who may have more scripted answers