<p>I will say that gratitude was expressed for either Mother’s Day or my birthday, both of which are in May, so it’ll take some time! :)</p>
<p>My D is actually good because her dad is an actor/director/playwright (not famous of course Lol! ) so he is pretty good with her at auditions. I do pay a little more attention to details and I thing that’s why I’m slightly ocd when it comes to preparation. If I couldn’t go my D would definitely be in good hands but I would be just a complete wreck wondering if she was ok and if she had and did everything she needed to. :)</p>
<p>I just re-read this thread and have tears in my eyes. The anticipation of all of these auditions is just so overwhelming. We are so ready to get this show on the road. Two auditions before Christmas, then Chicago Unifieds and a couple more at the end of February. I am just antsy. My D is calm – totally focused on her HS Musical, God bless her. Thanks to last year’s parents for all of the insights! We will pay it forward.</p>
<p>You got this @Divamamacita !</p>
<p>I think the kids handle things so much better than their parents. They are so occupied with shows and senior year and all we wind up focusing on is auditions. I’m with MTMC, you got this!!</p>
<p>Thanks, guys! I feel like I know you both since I have been following you since last year!</p>
<p>Yep, you’re strapped into the roller coaster and ready for the ride to begin!!</p>
<p>I was in your position two years ago. Here is the advice I got from my daughter’s audition coach: as a parent your job is to be a sherpa and schlep all their supplies around, and most of all to be quiet. What she meant was that you should not be badgering the folks at the school how wonderful your child is, and how many things your child has done, or dominating any group discussions with stories about how many roles you chile has had or ask question after question and so on. Or speak loudly about where “we” had already auditioned and how “we” thought we did great at such and such (I love the “we” idea about auditions, last I checked no parents actually sing or dance or act at these). And believe me I saw that out there. Most schools have information sessions while kids are auditioning, and in those I asked general questions about things like campus safety, schloarships, etc. But in general I did what my daughter, wife, and coach said: I kept my mouth shut and listened. </p>
<p>One memory will live with me for a while. At one school there was a lunch with students in the program, and one set of parents doninated the conversation. No one, including their daughter nor any other kids or parents, could get a word in edgewise. So their daughter turned to mine, and said loud enough for all to hear: “I wish my parents could be more like your father”. </p>
<p>So enjoy the process; it’s a great time to bond with your child (dads, trust me, you want to go on at least a couple of these). Be supportive, make sure your child has all their supplies, and be ready to simply listen not only to those at the school, but most importantly to your child after you leave. Some kids will want to discuss the whole day, some will be very quiet and not want to share for a while. Give them whatever space they need. </p>
<p>LOL at the “we” comment @jeffandann, I think I caught myself doing that a couple times even though I always tried to say “she”. Agree with your other comments - I was there to carry stuff, make sure she was on time to the school, attend info sessions especially if they conflicted with her audition time, and suport her however she needed. It was great to be with her so much. </p>
<p>My husband and I took turns. We stayed out of information sessions and tried, wherever possible, not to be right outside the door of the audition rooms. Our role was mostly buying tea and soup and finding addresses – and of course driving and paying for hotels. I LOVED being there, though, and meeting the other parents and watching the people and getting to share in this very exciting phase of my S’s life.</p>
<p>“Watch your pronouns” was one of the best pieces of advice I got during this journey. I still cringe when people say, “We applied…”</p>
<p>A few years ago my daughter had a big, big lead in a show. We had to get on line early to get a good seat, and all the parents online of course ended up chatting. One mother was unbelievable. She completely dominated the conversation in a loud and booming voice talking about her daughter and all her accomplishments. We were polite and responded with nods and smiles, and asked her socially appropriate questions like where she was from, etc. but she never asked us one question about us, or even asked who our child was. The other parents close by were rolling their eyes. Ever since then, my husband and I use her child’s name as a code word for annoying parents, which I’m sure is not what that mom hoped her child would be known for…</p>
<p>I’m so excited for all of you that are embarking on this journey!!! My D’s time won’t come until next year. Wishing all the best for you and your children! Can’t wait to hear the success stories that come at the end of all of this!</p>
<p>@Calliene I sat next to one of those at an audition last year. They did ask me one question though - “where else is your D applying?” Um NOYDB? And I have to confess that the constant preening made me blurt out my own brag - we had just found out the day before this audition that D had passed the UMich prescreen - and so I think that’s how I responded to “where else…” and then I was absolutely stunned when their response was “What’s a prescreen?”. As the parent group was moved around throughout the day - I avoided sitting with them again. And I’m terrible at the “we” pronoun. Constantly correcting myself.</p>
<p>OMIGOSH, @kategrizz! I too came across parents last season who didn’t know what a prescreen was. Flabbergasted!</p>
<p>I’m terrible at the pronoun as well…and quite frankly it was total joint effort to get him where he is so I really don’t have a problem with it… I never say “we are a freshman at Otterbein” , just in case anyone thought I’ve totally lost it LOL</p>
<p>I strongly maintain there is a place for “we”, esp in the BFA process. D is the artist - she is the one performing and I wouldn’t “we” that, but that college journey was “us” - researching, applications, scheduling, traveling, evaluating… we did that as a family - and I will never feel that I can’t use a “we” when talking about it. Not everyone gets it (I have had more than one person poo poo) but it’s true. I love D more than life itself, but if she had not had help I don’t know what the result would have been. She had two friends last year with parents who did not support the idea of a BFA (although they had allowed their kids to attend a performing arts HS- go figure) They tried, and they struggled. In the end, neither were accepted into any of the BFA programs they applied to. Of course there are many variables, but not having family support certainly didn’t help.</p>
<p>I just really try to remember not to say “we auditioned” since I never set foot in an audition room! But yes, the process was very “we”.</p>
<p>I tried to avoid the audition-day “we” statements unless it related to traveling to or from auditions or the process leading to the audition (clearly a “we” activity as others have pointed out). On audition day, if the school offered a parent program, I attended. I enjoyed comparing schools based on rehearsal and performance space, proximity of the dorms to the studios, cafeteria offerings, etc. If the auditions were not on campus, I learned to seek out a coffee house! I was cornered at an early audition by a very nervous, talkative mom who shared with me her D’s entire experience as a performer (and I kid you not, she started with kindergarten). I couldn’t politely extract myself but the experience made me so tense, I did not want to repeat it! After that, I stuck around until I got the lay of the land, made a plan to reunite with my S and went exploring. It preserved my calm.</p>
<p>I found an iPad and earphones were great thing for me to have. If situations got uncomfortable (which often they did in the waiting areas - lots of parents talking too much about their child’s successes, trying to one up or intimidate others around them, etc…) I could busy myself with work, read a book, listen to music - even watch a show (we downloaded Downton Abbey which was a great stress reliever to watch together at night after auditions were done for the day!) But take something you can busy yourself with if you would prefer not to engage in lengthy conversations with other parents or participants. Find an out of the way spot to sit and keep busy. I will say I also met many lovely people. And one of the benefits of having done a couple of different summer programs was that daughter ran into a friend or two at every audition we attended. So we weren’t completely anti-social. But we did try to stay away from any controversy and have as calm of an audition day as possible.</p>
<p>“We” went to 2 auditions on site and Chicago Unifieds and all the parents I met were wonderful. I was actually hoping to run into some of the other type of parents since I find it entertaining, but no such luck. 
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