<p>Well, I think “we” is probably okay through college auditions. But, after that it’s not “we” anymore and sometimes this is harder for the parents than the kids. Stage-moming ends with adulthood. It’s not always a pretty process. </p>
<p>Separation is developmentally appropriate for the teenager and though I am always ready to help with something the kid truly can’t accomplish solo, my primary message is “You can handle this. Let me know if you need me to help in any way but I think you’ve got this.” My kid’s accomplishments and failures are his alone. In fact, even the transportation piece is his to manage unless it requires car travel. Still no license but planes and trains and hotels and the like are all things he can and most often will handle without me or my spouse putting our oars in. I bring all my crazy obsessive energies here and try to keep them out of his orbit. Your mileage may vary considerably. </p>
<p>I thought I’d read a lot and brought a couple of books, but I found I was too scattered and stressed to read, and busy trying to not show my stress to my son. I had only positive experiences with other parents, particularly the very long boring day at Juilliard. Met lots of cool people there that made the waiting easier. I heard some bragging and name dropping from time to time, but I tend to tune that out since it honestly just shows insecurity on the parents’ part. I did see a few really stressed parents carrying their kids’ stuff, trailing behind their very stressed daughters (mostly daughters), each yelling at the other. I felt for them. It’s a really stressful process, no denying it. </p>
<p>Mostly what I did those days? I texted my friends a lot, ate good food, did a lot of people watching, and tried to keep my mind off the whole process so I could be positive for my son and sane for myself. </p>