What to do when wealthy parents wont help with school

Before I start, I want to thank everyone for contributing to this forum, you guys are amazing. Now a little back round. My parents got divorced years ago and my mother was able to take my dad`s life savings, he is already 56 and is getting very close to retiring. My sophomore year of high school he told me that he would put as much as he could towards my college but it wouldn’t be a lot. I completely changed my life plans, graduated high school in three years, and started at Northern Virginia Community College.

This is my last semester at NVCC, I will be attending JMU or GMU in the fall and will be studding economics and statistics. Any advice on JMU vs GMU for econ and stats would be fantastic as well. While we have been able to manage the payments for community college, that won’t be doable for the more expensive tuition in the fall. My dad won’t be able to help with tuition form here on out, makes over 190,000 a year, and as far as I`ve found it doesn’t leave me qualified for much help.

Ideas that my friends and I have been able to conjure include:
-Attempting to emancipate.
-Moving into a homeless shelter, with that paperwork I wouldn’t have to submit my parent’s income on the FAFSA application.
-Dropping out of this last semester, moving in with my grandparents (in Massachusetts), and attempting to have them become my legal guardians.
-My dad served in a Berlin from 79 to 87, while it was “occupied territory”, someone suggested he may have some version of the GI Bill that he could pass onto me.
-My dad has been in the air force or FAA for the past 30 plus years.

I really appreciate the help(:

How old are you?

Emancipation is a legal concept, and if you’re already a legal adult it’s not an available option.

Same thing for having your grandparents become your legal guardians - if you’re already a legal adult, they can’t be named as guardians (unless you’re incapacitated in some manner, and I don’t mean in a financial sense).

GI Bill education benefits from the time your father was in Berlin are not transferrable and in any event if not used by now they would have expired.

mcmike that is tough. you have my sympathy. It looks like you will not be offered aid. I am wondering if there is any merit aid that you could find…do you have an office at the CC that helps people transfer? they might know…
i agree with Belknapp, there are no real legal options around your dad’s income. can mom help?

I’m sorry to hear that your mom took all your dad’s savings. Did he get the house or nothing? That’s unusual.

But your dad is not destitute, he has a good income at $190,000 and a good 10 more years he could wait until retirement (not everyone retires at 62).

Also if he has been in the service that long he should get a pension too, right?

So how much could your dad give you for college a year? You can borrow $7,500 a year.

You might have to go to a cheaper school to finish your degree. How much are the schools you mentioned for tuition and an apartment? If you could pay for tuition out of summer earnings and your loan, could your dad pay for an apartment and food for you?

Why can’t your dad help out with tuition payments, if he makes $190,000+/year? What about your mother?

What’s the difference in cost between the two schools? What’s the price difference between the community college and what you need for college? Can dad swing what he’s paying now and you make up the difference in loans (or getting a job?) You still have summer to make a dent in tuition payments. Where’s mom in this scenario?

Im 19 years old so i guess that rules out emancipation and my grandparents. My mom hasn’t been in my life for a number of years and even if she was she managed to go threw everything she got in the divorce and she did get everything. Both schools are state schools that i would qualify for in state tuition for, so there are no cheaper options. Trust me Ive looked. They would both be between 40,000-50,000 for the second two years. My cc does have a transfer office, that ive visited on numerous occasions, but because of his income they arnt able to do anything.

I wish he was able to help more, but he has made it very clear that wouldn`t be possible. Regardless of my opinion of that, me continuing to bring it up has resulted in a tremendous amount of tension.

He said this would be the last semester he would be able to help with. Regardless of how fair that is to me it doesnt change anything. I just want to finish school and move on. I am starting to really freak out as it begins to look that that may be really difficult to pull off.

I have minimal savings, and with a job paying $8/hr wont begin to cover that tuition.

Can you commute to either school? You can probably cover tuition and fees with loans, savings(hopefully you have some) and a part-time job during the school year/working full-time during the summer. VCU in Richmond does offer some merit for students transferring from VA community colleges, do GMU and JMU do the same? Do you have a high enough GPA to earn any merit?

Im about 90 min from both Harrisonburg and that part of Fairfax both with TON of traffic. They are the two closest four year schools, I dont consider commuting an option. My GPA is a 3.4-3.5 and while there is some merit based help its almost all for income incoming freshman.

Can you get a job that helps with tuition? An associate’s degree should open some doors, no?

I am working but i wont have the associates until June and my schedule is all over the place making it really hard to more then 20 hours a week.

I can understand the tension that continuing to bring this up can cause. What would your dad or your grandparents say if you moved into a homeless shelter? Would there be any shame in that course of action that could him to take some financial responsibility, moral responsibility since legally he can kick you out? I get the impression that your dad would not care either way if you moved out of the house, and into a homeless shelter. Some deadbeat parents would even be proud of their kid for moving to a homeless shelter, temporarily, to qualify for several thousand in college costs.

I don’t mean to pick on your father, he is also a human being who was clearly scarred by the divorce situation. I can understand him being reluctant to making a commitment to provide aid if he has no savings, but with that kind of income, and with a background that suggests a healthy retirement, his decision seems shameful to me. As does your mothers.

Does the school have a social worker / counselor who can help you sort out these issues? It is far easier for me than it would be for you, to suggest that you physically abandon him now, forever, since he seems comfortable not meeting your needs.

Best of luck to you.

Can you take gap years and work until you are age 24 and independent for college financial aid purposes? Will VCU or GMU give you better financial aid when you are independent for college financial aid purposes (check their net price calculators)?

It looks like NVCC and GMU are close by. If you are living with your parents now, will they let you continue living there while attending GMU?

I think your best bet is to use your associate’s degree to get a job near a 4-year college. You won’t qualify for a federal Pell grant because of your dad’s income, but you can get the $6500/year federal student loan. That would cover your tuition at James Madison University or George Mason University. You’ll likely have to work and attend school part-time unless you can find a school that gives aid to transfers. Good luck.

If your dad have been in the air force for the last 30 years he should have a GI bill he can pass on to you if he didn’t use it already. You and your dad should cal the VA to look into it.

http://www.benefits.va.gov/gibill/post911_transfer.asp

How about an online school? There are a number of accredited public colleges/universities with online tuition costs in the $6000 - $10000 range (per year), even for out-of-state students. These costs should be feasible with a student loan and perhaps some work earnings if you can live with your dad or grandparents free of charge.

I agree.

Did your father remarry? And is that part of the reason he can’t help you with college?

(I hope he’s still paying for your health insurance.)

Im not even 19 and a half yet, I REALLY dont want to wait until im 24 and finish when im 26. Ive seen so many people take even a semester off and it never goes well, not to mention such an extended period of time. Im about 30 min from NVCC and in the opposite direction of GMU. In addition to the DC/Fairfax traffic it comes out to about a 90 minute commute.

As far as a social worker or counselor is concerned I have no great reason to move out and i am the oldest of four and that could put the others at risk.

No my father hasn’t remarried, he hasn’t even began to date despite it being nearly 6 years sense the divorce.