<p>Stop blaming the school system. Sure it might contribute some, but it's the parents' fault that there are so many of these boys failing and doing poorly in highschool. Personal responsibility people!</p>
<p>WillDO, some parents have successful schoolgirls, but not successful schoolboys. Because we are thoughtful parents, we are trying to figure out why. </p>
<p>And then there is the case where some boys do better In college than in highschool. Again, why is that? I know, you'll say, because they are away from their parents! Maybe. And maybe also because they are finally in a school environment that is working for them.</p>
<p>I apologize if I came off hostile. I let my emotions get the best of me. The fact that there are parents here who are looking for solutions to their son's problems are already taking action and responsibility.</p>
<p>I think it's more an issue of maturity, in the sense that girls reach full maturity around 14 while boys don't reach full maturity until 22-24 (at least in the pshysiological sense). So girls get treated like adults around 14-16, while boys don't have to act like men until their 22. I think if boys get less "boys will be boys" they will be more encouraged to achieve to their true potential.</p>
<p>Although I must say I don't see any of that in my school, boys do <em>not</em> care about the homework or school in the GENERAL sense, but that's because they explore their own interests in their own time. I have guy friends who know all there is to know about mechanical engineering and physics, or digital animation, or cars or planes or astrophysics or whatever, but they don't care about anything else. It's about letting people achieve in the arenas where they want to achieve.</p>
<p>Are Asian-American boys experiencing this falling behind as well? The article talks about African Americans, Latino Americans and Caucasian Americans, but omits any news about Asian Americans.</p>
<p>To a previous poster who said fathers encourage boys too much in sports as opposed to academics...the irony of that is that over half of the kids who get into the Ivies from our high school are recruited athletes. The boys who are athletes actually do better all round in college admissions than the ones who aren't (we do well with our top female athletes, too, but there are fewer of them who train to the top levels).</p>
<p>Catherine, what you just said is very true. All the girls that got into the Ivies from HS were all recruited athletes as well as the guys. It takes a lot of dedication, dicipline, and ability to bear pain to do well in sports; these are the same things a student needs to do well in school.</p>
<p>catherine: </p>
<p>There are many dads who have no idea what grades their sons received on their last 10 tests but they sure know how many points their sons scored in their last 10 games. What impression do you think that makes to those sons???</p>
<p>Certainly there are fathers that encourage both sports and smarts. The problem is that many don't -- they leave the "school issues" to "mom" (who checks the homework, knows when tests are, etc.). I also know many parents who insist that "their Johnny" is doing so well in whatever sport that he probably will get a college scholarship.</p>
<p>The ivies are good about insisting that their recruited athletes also be academically strong. My kids go to a prep school so all of its athletes are also academically strong; so I know that brainy athletes do exist.</p>
<p>If you want to see brainy athletes go talk to your school's highschool cross country athletes. I swear, 90% of the kids who run cross country in california are honor roll students.</p>
<p>I don't think Asian American boys are experiencing the fallout so much, simply because I think in Asian American culture there is more of an emphasis on schoolwork inside and outside of the home.</p>
<p>Could it be that mom's need more stress in their lives?</p>
<p>"WASHINGTON (Reuters) - Populations of boys born in stressful times enjoy an advantage their whole lives, living longer, on average, than males born in times of peace and prosperity, U.S. researchers reported on Monday." </p>
<p>JLauer-yes, at our school the athletes who get recruited by Ivies are honor roll students and will do fine at these schools. But based on today's competitve climate, these athletes with 1400 (w/o writing) boards and B+/A- averages would not be going to Princeton w/o the athletic hook (we know since the schools repeatedly take these kids over the 1500 plus, NMSF kids). Anyway - they will all do well.
When it comes to schoolwork, both my high school kids do their own. I do not know what their homework assignments are. I do not go over them and I didn't write my daughter's college essays. I don't do it for my son, either. I agree that when kids are failing or have learning disabilities parents need to step in, but what is wrong with a 16 year old being responsible? Plus I work- I already went to school. If boys as a group are failing, don't blame mom (we are already raising kids and working- don't tell me I have to do homework, too!).
My D is very happy to be going to NYU. Perhaps if I had helped write her high school papers she would be going to an Ivy. But it wouldn't have made her "smarter" if I'd done the work, or added to her success in the future - of which I have no doubt. Now of course my son, who is doomed by his sex to fail.....</p>
<p>My english teacher in 10th grade once told me I was the worst human being ever, a real piece of trash, because I told a girl she was a "cute chick." I was also recovering from a massive burn injury when this happened. No matter what I did the entire year, she always gave me a C- for my essays. Now that I'm older and working as an english tutor, I decided to look back at my old papers that she graded; they were definitely B papers at the least. Really messed up. Any of you other parents ever experience this sort of feminazi teacher with your sons before?</p>
<p>While I have not read this thread in its entirety I would like to offer the following link for consideration:
<a href="http://www.usatoday.com/news/education/2005-10-19-male-college-cover_x.htm%5B/url%5D">http://www.usatoday.com/news/education/2005-10-19-male-college-cover_x.htm</a>
This is a USAtoday article first published October of 05 noting the gap in College attendance. "There are more men than women ages 18-24 in the USA 15 million vs. 14.2 million, according to a Census Bureau estimate last year. But nationally, the male/female ratio on campus today is 43/57.." </p>
<p>While again it is a very general publication it does diminish the fact that young men are falling behind in High School success and College admission. These statistics are not excuses but facts. Such a trend will have an effect on our social structure. Consider the long term implications. Whether you have a son or daughter it is not a good thing.</p>
<p>I know this thread has cooled off, but it continues to fascinate me as I read through it.</p>
<p>I've read from the beginning toward the middle and from the end backwards, but haven't gotten through every single post, so I don't know if I'm about to duplicate what someone else has said: have the dual effects of television and increasing number of fatherless homes in our country been considered? Yes, these variables would affect females as well, but 1) there has been a concerted and organized effort to "rescue" girls in the past few decades, and it seems to be fairly well documented that boys are less resilient and more likely to act out emotionally when a parent leaves the family or under any other stressful or difficult transitions. I wonder whether longitudinal studies might show that boys, in fact, might not do as well overall in daycare situations as their female counterparts.</p>
<p>It's also documented that mothers hold their baby boys and make eye contact less with them than their daughters. Add television and what, about 85% of mothers in the workforce into that mix and I wonder how much the general population of young boys is read aloud to at home, fostering an interest in learning and an ability to sit attentively in class.</p>
<p>Why are we surprised?</p>
<p>WillDo--I have also seen this behavior in the workplace! </p>
<p>I recall seeing an interview on CSpan just yesterday concerning college education and the political correctness heavily in place at prestigious east coast schools contrasted to Stanford. The case was cited of two young men cited and brought before school authorities for having laughed inappropriately. Look at the actions of the Colgate president and the frats.
The gist of it all is the political movement for gender and economic "equality".</p>
<p>The whole politically correct movement and its foolish repurcussions was accurately foretold in the movie--Politically Correct University PCU--one of my favorites. Please rent it and you will have some hearty laughs.</p>
<p>Make sure you parents research the administration of the universities and colleges if you find political correctness to be foolish.</p>
<p>I think we'll be looking in the South and Midwest and let the coasts have the fun of dealing with it all.</p>
<p>Dizzymom - yes, single parent homes/lack of male role models was discussed in length in the original Newsweek article, TV to a lesser extent.</p>
<p>A big hole in the Newsweeks statistics is that it never says what the absolute numbers of males vs females in college is - if there are more boys than girls in that age cohort, then a lower % of boys in college could mean closer to equal numbers (I don't think that this is true, but i wish it had been made more clear).</p>
<p>cangel, there's more males than females in every young age cohort. The typical ratio at birth is about 103-105 boys for every 100 girls. But females have lower mortality rates and by roughly age 30-35 females begin outnumber males. At significantly older ages, females far outnumber males.</p>
<p>I'm a student, but I've read this thread from the beginning and figured I'd share my perspective.</p>
<p>Honestly, I can't help taking offense at the suggestion that girls are "obedient" and overachieve only because they are able to "sit quietly" and "do whatever they're told"--which is somehow equated to a lack of creativity or true intelligence.</p>
<p>I'm a quiet girl, but only in the sense that I don't speak unless I have something worth saying. I take notes in class partly because it helps me catalogue information that I'll need for essays, partly because the physical act of writing keeps me awake and paying attention (a masculine trait--oh no!). I don't care for memorization and rarely study for tests; I'm the girl who gets a 100% on the essay portion of a history test, but loses points because she can't remember Hitler's birthplace.
At 5, she was intellectually precocious and socially retrograde. I'd say the social didn't fully catch up until 11th grade. But keep her back a year and she would have been bored out of her skull. Almost literally.
That's me--almost literally. ;) I learned to read when I was three, and started school at five (I'm a November baby). When I was eight I asked for Barbies for my birthday, granted, but also for a miniature anatomy model (with removable organs!) and a microscope. I taught myself to create websites in HTML and CSS when I was twelve--I wrote my own code, and condescended people who used FrontPage (I must've been insufferable). In middle school my teachers praised my creativity, then reprimanded me for not following instructions.</p>
<p>I'm sure I can't be the only one.</p>
<p>I guess I just don't understand why taking notes and paying attention in class are construed to represent a conformist mind and a meek, submissive character. I can't speak for other students, but for me it's always been a question of respect. (That's respect for teachers as individuals, not as authority figures. If I can't respect a teacher as a person I have been known to turn into a "disciplinary problem"--the sarcastic smart-alecky kind. But I digress.) My teachers, for the most part, are sensible people with interesting things to say, and sitting still and listening to them--raising my hand if I've something to say--just seems like common courtesy, which to me has nothing to do with obedience for the sake of being "good" (something I am vehemently opposed to). If that makes me a mindless automatron, um, I guess I'm fine with that.</p>
<p>Okay, I'll step off my soapbox and address some of the earlier posts... sorry if my quotes are wrongly attributed; this thread is too long for me to track down all the instances of who said what.
[quote]
And, they still have recess! Yes, it's a 15 minute time period about 10:00 am where they can just walk around, grab a bite to eat, let off some steam. It is great and growing boys need that.
[/quote]
Is this unusual? I thought all schools had some form of recess, but I guess not. Mine has the following schedule:</p>
<p>08:15-08:25 - Homeroom
08:30-09:30 - Period 1
09:35-10:35 - Period 2
10:35-10:55 - Morning break
10:55-12:00 - Period 3
12:00-12:35 - Lunch
12:35-13:40 - Period 4
13:45-14:50 - Period 5
*14:55-15:45 - Period 6<a href="only%20for%20juniors%20and%20seniors">/i</a></p>
<p>11th/12th graders also have an assortment of "free periods" (up to 3 in one day, but usually 0-2). It's a sensible system, I think.</p>
<p>Re: girly books. I go to an international, secular private school and don't know what the norm is elsewhere, but the books I've read in class the past few years aren't particularly "girly". Just to check that I wasn't overlooking anything, I wrote out the ones I could remember, chronologically from 7th grade onwards:</p>
<p>To Kill a Mockingbird
Macbeth
Lord of the Flies
Twelfth Night
The House on Mango Street
Of Mice and Men
My Antonia
Henry IV, Part I
Oedipus Rex
Inherit the Wind
Hamlet
One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest
Chronicle of a Death Foretold
A Doll's House
The Sailor Who Fell From Grace with the Sea
Medea
Poetry by Robert Frost</p>
<p>Mango Street is the only one I'd call truly feminine (a series of vignettes told from the POV of a young girl growing up in a poor, primarily Hispanic neighborhood).
When he was 4, my older S announced that when he was older, he wanted to marry the then-love-of-his-life. He would be a teacher, he said, and when he got home, he would help his wife with the chores. His dad and I had a good laugh, but I was really proud of him.
That is absolutely adorable. :)</p>
<p>Sorry about the long, aimless post... I guess I'm mostly appalled at some of the stories in this thread. My school seems to be doing a pretty good job of catering to both boys and girls, and I had no idea that it was such a problem. It's thought-provoking.</p>
<p>FWIW, I have an even split of male (chemistry, English, math) and female (biology, French, history) teachers. My journalism class is team-taught by a male and a female teacher. The teacher who assigned the most ludicrous "artsy" projects--"Act out a scene from Play X"; "Make a poster representing Character Y's emotions throughout Book Z"--was my 10th grade English teacher....a man. (My grades took a nosedive that year, as did my ability to write [I'm still recovering from that one].) </p>
<p>And all of this proves...what? Nothing much, I'm afraid.</p>
<p>/sorry about the long, aimlessly rambling post... just a student's perspective.</p>
<p>A whole new perspective on the why boys are falling behind issue:</p>