When H and I were in college, the difference between private and public colleges/universities is not what it is today. Making the adjustment from a small town and being able to finish our degrees on time and in an env’t for success, H and I both benefited from private colleges. Not because our parents knew a lot about colleges, but dad learned from his friend about this college for this major; H was directed to his school because his mom got advice from a HS counselor for his field of study. H’s parents lived under a very tight budget, putting 4 through college, and he had student loans and grants. Parents did not sign for any additional loans because they knew they couldn’t afford to.
Ben Carson has discussed ‘no incentives’ for colleges to contain costs, as the government put in the loan situation - however we all know what has happened to people caught up in that and keeping their student loans around way too long for whatever reasons, including borrowing way too much for what their earning potential was going to be. A caller on Dave Ramsey had $210,000 in student loans and is earning $30,000/year.
Colleges ‘compete’ for students, so they have had to build nicer dorms/suite housing, recreational facilities etc. That all gets paid via student fees or overall tuition.
We also are caught with people living longer, that parents need to have saved well/invested well to fund their care and their living expenses in longer retirement periods. And sometimes they also feel the need to assist the grandparents.
Our society and some parents have ‘entitled’ kid messages. What we lived w/o growing up is a whole lot different than our kids growing up w/o.
There are some college financial situations that have controversy and differing opinions. For example a couple has stayed married and have a household income, that had they been divorced and the child only needs to claim the lesser household income for their aid, they may qualify for Pell Grants that the intact household is not. Yes it costs more for two households to run, but this is an example. Some states have a cut-off on keeping household income under (is CA $70,000 or $75,000?). So families follow the ‘rules’ to not disqualify themselves for college financial aid.
There is a paradigm for colleges/universities that doesn’t always make sense. The same can be said for some of the unusual things in our tax code.
It is hard to say if college was harder for my parents to pay or for us to pay. Dad had his own business, and he really realized he ‘made it’ when I was finishing my sophomore year in college. They paid for 4 for college, while H and I have 2. I know we as parents were very informed about colleges/costs/opportunities. Our kids were better prepared for college - we made the sacrifice for them to be in a college prep Catholic HS. Our kids worked hard on the standardized testing to improve their scholarships. They have been able to go away to the in-state school of their choice, one is at the state flagship.
Glad OP is happy where he is living despite his feelings with the available lower cost college options/ in-state public or flagship for his DD. Sounds like he had mixed feelings of where they were with the older sibling on college selection, and now have even more feelings with this college bound student.
I have no qualms at all for the very low income having the educational opportunities currently available for them. Some were fortunate to have some public magnet programs that helped them get an education commensurate with their abilities.
I do like HSs are having dual enrollment and AP opportunities. Some parents just do not help ‘shape’ their student for the many years under their roof. College is a big transition; some can soften the transition by utilizing CC or utilize a gap year if the student is not ready to go away to college.
I am not for ‘free’ CC for all - the students that didn’t apply themselves in HS will have an opportunity to continue to not apply themselves. Real world has to hit their parents and these students. I also believe free CC will lower the overall student body in CC and drag down other students. Students have to have motivation and some ‘skin’ in the game IMHO. We want CC to continue to have value for all, students and as an academic institution, and not be a glorified HS.