@prospect1 I don’t see where people on this thread are criticizing OPs daughter. What I do see people criticizing is the poster’s belief that she deserves something better because she’s “amazing” ,not because she’s earned it. I commend her for having a full HS experience ,full of experiences and not feeling the need to “work around the clock to get an A in every AP known to Man.” That said , you reap what you sow. My son worked hard, did not do crazy test prep ,or load up on ECs just because they looked good on a college ap. He worked hard, studied a reasonable amount of time , etc. When his test scores initially came back one point lower than what was needed for a larger merit scholarship, his response was not “I don’t want to take anymore tests or it’sso close I should get the scholarship anyway .”
His response was to retest one more time
because it was a mature and responsible decision. He earned it, and he got it. The OP has criticized others for being "given privileges " that they didn’t earn, but he’s asking for the same thing. No one is telling him to spend more on an education than he wants to or is comfortable with. That is his family’s decision. All anyone is saying is actions have consequences and that you need to be willing to accept them , and not complain about it when you get an undesirable outcome.