<p>I am a college professor interested in knowing what parents look for with regard to academics, social life or campus life for their daughters. Also, is this different from what you think is important for sons? Thanks.</p>
<p>Well I'm not a parent but I could tell you what my parents look for (I'm a daughter!). They look for a safe area surrounding the campus (this was a problem at Columbia and a teensy bit of a problem at UChicago), minimal Greek life, and non-random roommate matching.</p>
<p>Dorm security is important, IMO. The security desk and checkin procedure in every Columbia dorm was a huge factor in eliminating most worries about big-city dangers. Lighting around campus, emergency call boxes, and reasonably safe-looking walking routes are important, too, I'd say.</p>
<p>These factors are very dependent on the parents and their outlook/experience. Small town parents confronted by an urban environment are likely to be much more nervous than those from a similar location to the college.</p>
<p>I'm also a daughter, but I know well what my parents look for:</p>
<p>They want the school's academics to be rigorous, but not so hard that I don't enjoy the college "experience." They want me to be able to make friends, but not so much that I can't study or perform well. They also want me to be safe, so security as a factor is important.</p>
<p>To answer your question: yes, I think some parents look for different aspects of college based on whether they have a daughter or son. For sons, I think the most stressed aspects are social life and sports. I think for daughters, parents tend to stress academic rigor, although this is definitely not always the case.</p>
<p>I can honestly say this is the first time it has occurred to me that maybe I should have looked at things for my daughter I wouldn't look at for my son, or vice versa, except for things reflecting their (not-entirely-un-gender-related) separate academic and EC interests (i.e., English departments and radio stations are less important to son, science programs and history less important to daughter; daughter affirmatively wanted a school with a strong core curriculum and son would view that as a mild negative; daughter much more attentive to what people are wearing). My daughter was at least willing to think about more isolated campuses; my son won't think about something that isn't in or reasonably close to a decent-sized city.</p>
<p>jimbob: Columbia vs. Chicago, I think your parents had (have?) it wrong. Both schools are fine, but if you are going to worry about security coming and going around campus, I would worry more at Chicago (which is where my daughter is, by the way, and I don't actually worry).</p>
<p>well i dont plan to go to either school :)
and the reason we decided it was that way was because columbia seemed a lot less self-contained. the campus didnt seem as enclosed as uchicago.</p>
<p>We will be looking for very different things for son (#2) than we did for daughter(#1), but that is because they are very different kids, not because of the gender.</p>
<p>I was a little bit concerned about security with her than I will be with her brother, and definitely concerned about different aspects of security - with her it is the walking at night, location of dorm room, etc. With him it will be security of valuables - he'll get robbed blind.</p>
<p>I thought he might be the rah-rah big sports guy, but he enjoyed visiting her smaller residential campus, and right now is talking about smaller schools. </p>
<p>It is funny JHS, he is the one who would be more in tune with what the kids are wearing - he's my social child, not to be seen without a GF since age 13, really into the "persona" he portrays.</p>
<p>Have only child, a D, so never gave it a thought. At first, D looked for schools in top tier for their challenging academics, and opportunities for the students due to their huge endowments. In deciding where to apply,etc., security never really came into it. It was only when we went on tours and security kept getting pointed out to us that it became important. But it seemed as though all the schools had pretty equal security measures, so it really was not determinant in our decision. That said, when we went to Chicago for accepted students' weekend, we visited family (5 of which are cops or in law enforcement agencies) and they said that although they wanted her there, they didn't want her at U of Chicago because it was dangerous, that much of the crime never is reported in the papers or on TV, and that they wanted to give her all their contact numbers so they could help her if need be. That along with the poor FA make her reject it. Amherst won out - I know, huge difference, but it had what she wanted in the end - challenging academics, secure campus, and no core (which she had thought she wanted at the beginning of the process, but changed her mind) and wonderful opportunities for students to travel, close interaction with profs, focus on undergrad not on grad studies. And the FA package really was a huge determining factor. I think that if I had a son, the criteria would still be the same - what school could give him what he needed?</p>
<p>I have one of each gender, and I really haven't thought in terms of gender when they were choosing colleges. I don't think they thought in terms of gender, either, although they have very different tastes (which are probably, to some extent, gender-related). My son, for example, is delighted to be attending a university with big-time sports events; my daughter, who will apply to colleges this year, would never consider taking sports into consideration when selecting a college.</p>
<p>Whoa! We must live in alternate universes! For me, the Columbia campus has a whole fortress-of-solitude, circle-the-wagons design. There are limited points of ingress/egress, and everything -- dorms, classrooms, library, food, gym -- is pretty close to one another. So it's possible to patrol the whole inner-campus area effectively. And, as a practical matter, the students tend to live on campus, because it's a really good deal in terms of NYC rents. Chicago is much more sprawly -- it can easily be a mile on city streets from your dorm to wherever you're going. Most of the kids move off campus for at least half of their time there (D is paying thousands less than dorm fees for much nicer space, but walking farther). Also, the area surrounding Hyde Park is much poorer than the area surrounding Morningside Heights, which is really part of a continuous affluent neighborhood that extends south to Greenwich Village and beyond. Walking the two miles from Columbia to Zabar's is pleasant and fun; there's no place two miles from the center of campus at Chicago where people who are not very familiar with the community would feel comfortable walking.</p>
<p>I agree with JHS about Columbia being a secure enclave, though a number of the dorms are just outside the walled/gated perimeter, and some are on the other side of Barnard. The first-year dorms tend to be close. The overall neighborhood is actually quite pleasant and safe.</p>
<p>But... we're hijacking the thread here. I don't see much difference in parental concerns about academics between M/F (that's more of an individual thing); I do think female students are perceived to be more likely targets of rape/robbery/assault by strangers, not to mention situations like date rape, hence greater parental concerns about security/safety issues when sending their female child off to school.</p>
<p>I've noticed HUGE differences in parents, though. Some have their heads filled with images of mayhem lurking around every corner, while others assume that their kid is capable of avoiding problems and don't worry much at all. Moms seem to be more protective/worried, but that's not always the case.</p>
<p>One problem that my family brought up when I (as the daughter) was choosing housing for MIT next year was single sex housing. My mother in particular was interested in me trying to find a single sex suite in my dorm, because coed suites have coed bathrooms. I personally dont have an issue walking around in a bathrobe/brushing my teeth/urinating in a stall next to a male, but my mother was very concerned. However, I highly doubt that I would have had this issue if I had been a man...</p>
<p>Well, D liked schools with high male-female ratio. I doubt S will feel the same...</p>
<p>Otherwise, I agree with others who say it is more about the differences in kids than differences in gender per se. The only thing I can see so far with gender - D is rising sophomore at Princeton, S is rising junior in high school - is that S refuses to look at Swarthmore because they cut their football team. Not that he plays, or even watches football, just that that seemed to be an indicator of culture he would not like. And for him, UCLA's prowess to the NCAA basketball championship is a plus. D was indifferent to sports teams. Finally, although we didn't look for it, I think of Princeton's large percentage of women in leadership positions as a big plus for D. For S, it would be neutral although of course always appreciated:).</p>
<p>My son applied to two schools that my daughter applied to including the one that she is now attending. She probably would have applied to some of the others that he applied to if we had investigated them with her. Neither was interested in what sports were offered and in fact, son applied to one school that had nothing except intermural sports. Funny thing is, I dont think of them as being that much alike but when it came to colleges they were looking for the same things.</p>
<p>My D did like the idea of going to a school with a relatively high male:female ratio, but I don't think that was a big decision point. I suppose security was a bit more of a concern, but that is a relative issue. My D has been going to NYC alone, including the Columbia area, since she was a high school junior. She recently came back from the city about midnight. We don't worry about her being in the city or taking the subways and trains. We worry when she gets off at the suburban train station. In spite of some concerns about security, she is attending school in Baltimore, which must has a crime rate pretty close to the top.</p>
<p>I remember talking to a neighbor who had 3 daughters about this. He said that anywhere that was Catholic would be OK for his girls. One of them had started out at Indiana U. and left after one year for Fordham. I didn't really understand what he meant by it all until later, when I realised that he thought that if it had a religious orientation it would be "safe".</p>
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One problem that my family brought up when I (as the daughter) was choosing housing for MIT next year was single sex housing.
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<p>Oh jeez. You have that type of parent. So where are you temped?</p>
<p>I am surprised that people have not said more about sexism or lack thereof on campus. If I were a parent, I'd encourage my daughter to ask female students how they are treated by classmates, living group-mates, and professors. If the daughter was into sports, I'd suggest that she ask about the attention and resources devoted to women's sports - whether they were respected or given the men's teams' scraps.</p>
<p>:D macgregor. and i refuse to try for a single sex suite. i got my way! <em>dance</em></p>
<p>there is a website somewhere out there that lists all the campus safety stats (thefts, assaults, etc) for each school. anyone have the link floating around?</p>
<p>I don't have the link, but when I was look at schools (female) my dad was concerned about safety, particularly after we visited USC where there was a big emphasis on how safe their campus was (implying that most parents were worried about safety). He went to the site that huskem mentioned, and looked at the numbers for several schools. After he figured out that per capita, USC has about the same crime rates as Rice, he stopped worrying. I did end up at the safest of the schools I was considering - Carnegie Mellon. It seems that there crime is only in issue in bad parts of town late at night when students are alone.</p>
<p>One female student on another thread was considering a heavily male school that has a bit of a reputation for being unfriendly to girls. She asked 5 females on campus if they would still go there if they could do it over again, and all said no. She decided that another school would be a better choice.</p>