<p>Once again, I think turtletime nailed it. All this strategizing to give kids an edge academically or enable them to become the next “Johnny Football” or whatever, even though it has not proven to work, does have negative impacts on teachers and classrooms. My kids attended a K-2 school and then a 3-5 school. Having a limited grade range allowed the teachers to focus on the needs of kids within a narrow age spectrum. It was fantastic. The more people who “redshirt,” the more the schools lose their focus on the kids who are SUPPOSED to be there between 5-8 or 8-11. In a regular elementary school, you’ll see more and more kids going through puberty in 5th grade and dealing with everything that brings.</p>
<p>Studies don’t support the notion that double promoted kids struggle socially. It’s something everyone “says” but reality is, few have any actual experience with it. Part of why the vast majority of grade skippers succeed is because there are so few of them. It can be really HARD to skip a grade. More often than not, kids have to be MANY years ahead to qualify. They are observed, tested, meetings are held (oh the meetings!) Schools aren’t double promoting kids who are immature. To hold a kid back, takes nothing but the parents saying “nah, we’ll wait.” Studies actually show that most continue to be class leaders and do better socially than kids who were capable but did not skip.</p>
<p>With grade skippers, you have to look at the alternatives. Does a kid who starts kindergarten 4 or 5 grades ahead have a real shot at being socially happy with her classmates? Outside of class… sure! I tell you though, you send a 5-year-old to kindergarten who is reading novels and writing book reports for fun, sit them in a classroom with kids still learning their letter sounds and the social atmosphere is not normal at all.</p>
<p>Again, cut-off days are arbitrary but the vast majority of kids develop at a fairly predictable rate. When it’s just a few of the best candidates being held back and just a few kids skipping a grade, then your chances of problems are low. That is not a stage we are at. It’s still very hard to skip a grade. It’s still ridiculously easy and common to hold a kid back.</p>
<p>I have a niece with an October birthday. Her parents were determined to start her in school for a variety of reasons (not all of them necessarily good, in our opinion). She did fine in school until she started her junior year as a 15 year old and decided to date an 18 year old senior. They were in many classes together; of course she argued that the age difference didn’t matter.</p>
<p>I really don’t understand the issue. Effectively, when a HS junior takes 5 AP courses she is two years ahead. Similarly, when she takes high school courses in middle school she is ahead. A good school system should be able to test kids starting in elementary and middle school to match them with suitable coursework. Do your kids go to schools where all the kids are in the same classes because they are graduating on a certain date?</p>
<p>I was an October birthday in NY with a Dec. 1 cutoff, so usually the youngest in my class. Combined with the late-blooming genetics, 8th to 11th grades were socially horrifying to the point where I would have held my kids out with a fall birthday. </p>
<p>Our oldest was born mid-June and went to kindergarten in a state with a Sept. 1 cutoff. Since we are a sports-oriented family and youth sports (soccer and baseball) have an Aug.1 cutoff, holding our son out would have meant sports teams with kids in a grade ahead of him. We put him in K at 5 because he was socially, emotionally and intellectually ready for it.</p>
<p>HS, though, was not than fun for him and he told us we should have held him back. He took a gap year to work, mature and recalibrate. He is now enjoying his freshman year as one of the older ones.</p>
<p>In my experience, wrestling dads are worse than football dads. My son met a kid in the finals of a tournament. The kid was in the same grade, more than a full year older (held out an extra year with a November birthday), and had been eating Lean Cuisine for two months in order to drop a weight class right before the state tournament. They were both in kindergarten.</p>
<p>I skipped a grade - I think that must have been popular in the 60’s- and it was really a mistake. I was already small for my age and very shy. Just after I was skipped, we moved to a new area where the school was way ahead of my old school, so I went from being top in my class to needing tutoring. I eventually caught up academically and graduated near the top of my class in high school, but socially I was always just a little behind. </p>
<p>My boy-girl twins are July. They are 29 now and both are doing great, but looking back we probably should have kept them back a year. Our D was very shy and had a hard time being separated from her brother those first couple of years. Our son was pretty immature and always the class clown. Our D did well academically, but our son hated school and really didn’t kick in until he settled down in college. OUr youngest son is a Sept. baby and even though he was one of the youngest in his class, I had no hesitation about starting him on time. He was more than ready academically and socially, and was always at the top of his class throughout school. He was a little on the small size initially but caught up around his junior/senior year. The only slight issue is that when he was being recruited for soccer, I think his size was a little bit of an issue. I would never have held him back for that reason, but I think it did impact his choices a little bit.</p>
<p>I started college at 17 yet redshirted my own daughter in Kindergarten. She has a Christmas birthday and started her “first” kindergarten at 4.5 bc the district allowed through December kids. </p>
<p>I wasn’t worried about academics. She’s in the gifted programs. I wasn’t worried about sports. I <em>was</em> concerned because she was a preemie and the very smallest kid in her grade and to combine that with the youngest in nearly the whole district was too much. This year I was very grateful she wasn’t accompanying her former kindergarten classmates to middle school just yet! </p>
<p>The redshirting suggestion was first raised by her kindergarten teacher who definately had a bias against younger kids…she kept telling me that even if my daughter was smart it would be hard on her when she was so much behind the other girls at puberty etc …I resented her bias but overall the redshirting was right for us.</p>
<p>Perazziman, it’s not always as simple as that. Generally, when a 15-year-old is taking AP, there is an entire CLASS of kids taking it with her. When the middle school offers high school maths, there is usually a CLASS of middle schoolers taking high school maths. You send a 5-year-old who is 2-5 grades advanced into a kindergarten class, they are alone. I have two who score in the same percentile IQ wise. One is a passionate learner who needs high levels of challenge to maintain mental stability. She’s the one that skipped a grade in elementary and moved to the community college at 15 when the high school couldn’t accommodate her any longer. Acceleration IMPROVED her social life considerably and she has friends all over the age spectrum through activities. My other child is laid back, playful and social. He’s been quite well cared for in his natural grade. He goes up a grade for math and science with older kids but otherwise, likes things to be easy… gives him more time to play. Prefers to be with kids in his age window. Different kids need different things.</p>
<p>All the people who say that they are glad that they held their kids back a year and are happy because their kid was small, seemed young, etc., consider this: a large part of the reason they seemed that way is that so many kids are redshirted. Your kid might not have been immature, he was just with kids 1 1/2 years older. It’s a vicious cycle. The more people who redshirt, the more people will feel they have to do it. If the national cutoff for K became turning 6 by Aug 1 tomorrow (many claim they redshirt because K is more appropriate for 6 year olds),my prediction is that within 5 years, K would be filled with 7-7 1/2 year olds. Many seem to be pathologically afraid of having their kid be the youngest.</p>
<p>I read somewhere that an unusually high percentage of elite hockey players in Canada had birthdays in November and December. The theory behind the article was that this resulted from the date cut-off for Junior hockey leagues in Canada is universally October31, and no exceptions are allowed. Continuing the line of thought, the older, more mature kids develop confidence earlier which leads to exposure to more opportunities, which leads to a higher level of competition, which brings better coaching, etc.</p>
<p>I find it interesting that the hyper-competitive world of athletics has settled on a hard cut-off policy while education leaves decisions up to parents - as if education is intended to be less competitive.</p>
<p>[Youngest</a> Kids in Class May Be More Likely to Get ADHD Diagnosis](<a href=“http://consumer.healthday.com/kids-health-information-23/attention-deficit-disorder-adhd-news-50/youngest-kids-in-class-may-be-more-likely-to-get-adhd-diagnosis-670784.html]Youngest”>Youngest Kids in Class May Be More Likely to Get ADHD Diagnosis - Consumer Health News | HealthDay)</p>
<p>Interesting article about ADHD being more prevelant in the younger kids in the class. Do I think age really has something to do with ADHD? Probably not. But sitting still in class so you don’t get LABELED ADHD, perhaps.</p>
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<p>I skipped a grade in elementary school and ended up doing exactly the same thing in high school. The guy hadn’t been redshirted (this was back in the 1970s); he was simply one of the older students in his year.</p>
<p>My parents realized that they had to accept this, no matter how uncomfortable they were with it, because they were the ones who had skipped me, and it’s always been considered acceptable for a junior to date a senior. However, I can sympathize with parents who find themselves in this situation because they sent their daughter to school on time but the boy was redshirted.</p>
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<p>Anecdotes are not evidence, but for what it’s worth, I was skipped, and I struggled socially until college.</p>
<p>I’ve never heard the term “redshirting” used to describe holding a child back a year before starting school. Then again, maybe some parents are doing it for sports. Just in my experience, about 90% of the cases of holding back I’ve heard of have been for boys – and of those the primary reason has been parents’ concern about immaturity, peer pressure, and/or bullying. They assume that an older, taller boy would be better able to deal with social issues that might arise.</p>
<p>A couple I know whose son was a spoiled brat and big problem as a young child were agonizing years ago as to whether to hold their son back “so he [could] mature”. Knowing that the child would be in my child’s class if they didn’t hold him back, I encouraged them to do so! They did, his behavior is now so much better, and they are happy with their decision. I don’t know if holding him back had anything to do with it, but I like to think that I did my part. ;)</p>
<p>Marian, do you think you would have been a social fit had you not skipped? You can’t know. I think we all have unrealistic views of what constitutes “fitting” in socially. Gifted kids can be different period. Would they have been “less different” in their natural grade? Nope. I look at my eldest who never had any interest in pop culture… thought most of what was presented to youth as shallow and low quality. Was not “boy crazy.” Would rather be reading or at a play than at the movies or shopping. Being a grade lower was not going to make those things any cooler than the higher grade… it was only going to make her academic situation worse. Different is different. Sometimes we just have to accept that about ourselves.</p>
<p>I was one of the oldest in my grade. Never felt I fit. Some years I struggled to find people just to have lunch with. Elementary school was me at my own desk doing accelerated work alone. Middle and high school were sitting in honors classes day dreaming, refusing to do what seemed pointless homework and still acing classes. Thank goodness for my interest-based friends outside of school that were all over the map in regards to age.</p>
<p>I think we’ve tricked ourselves into believing that fitting in at school is the norm. That there are all these people who had glorious educations filled with positive interactions with the random assortment of neighbors who happened to be born the same year. It doesn’t really work that way. My kids have tons of friends (though no close friends from school) and every single one sees themselves as a misfit… and yet their are tons of them. How does that work lol.</p>
<p>My D was a 9/28 bday with a Sept 1 cutoff. She was a daycare kid and had completed age 4 preschool prior to Sept 1. The school district wouldn’t accept her for K, and so she progressed into the kindergarten class at the preschool center, which would accept her. It was accredited and a great program, just 12 kids in the class. We didn’t want her to repeat K at the public school the following year, so we had the district test her and she was deemed more than ready for first grade. They accepted her as a transfer student, but that was the last year they did so. Now they hold firm to the Sept 1 cut-off even when a kid transfers in after K. D has always been the 2nd youngest in her grade - there is only 1 girl younger and she came over from the same K class as D. Both have done fine academically and socially. D is in the gifted program and as a HS junior is taking all honors and AP’s. The only time she felt young is the past few months as she is chomping at the bit to go for her learner’s permit on Saturday! But there are still many in her grade that are not yet driving. Fortunately no 17 or 18 year old boys have come knocking yet! </p>
<p>S was a mid- August bday and we were often asked if we were going to hold him back for K. We never considered it, he was already reading and very ready. He was still able to excel in sports as a youth and in HS. The only age issue we had is that the Little League cut-off is May, so he had to play on tournament teams with the grade level below him. That really bummed him out for years, until he finally was allowed to play up during high school summer ball. In the end he was eligible for an extra year of American Legion ball beyond his grade-level peers (summer after freshman year of college), but by then he was done with giving up his summers for baseball. </p>
<p>Neither kid regrets our choices that made them young for their grade, but I always tell parents - make the decision that feels right to YOU.</p>
<p>D received services through the public school system at the tender age of 3: she had sensory integration issues which had interfered with her developing fine and gross motor skills (couldn’t “bunny hop” and her pencil grip was an amazingly ineffective one that I had never seen before.) </p>
<p>I live in NH in a town which had no public K. The same school system evaluated her for 1st grade or Readiness and suggested Readiness (she also had a late July birthday in a system with a Sep. 1 cutoff). We were concerned that they were predisposed to send her to Readiness because they had already encountered her (and we had never even heard of Readiness before.) We had a conference with her private K teacher (who said she could swing either way – it wasn’t clear to her that D was ready, but it wasn’t obvious that she wasn’t ready either.) The VP (who had evaluated D) seemed to indicate that it was our choice, and clearly recognized D’s intellect, but told us which flags led to the Readiness recommendation. We went with it.</p>
<p>Looking back, I think we probably would have regretted any decision we made D is, well, unique (just like every other kid :-). She’s verbally gifted, more mature than other kids her age, a bit of a late-bloomer for sports-related things, and has ADHD-inattentive. School was not a great environment for her. She picked up things very easily, became bored even more easily, and had a hard time making friends since she was more mature than kids her chronological age and surrounded by mostly younger kids. She went off to college with no study skills, but knew that she needed to develop them and did. </p>
<p>Switch focus to me: I had a June birthday and easily made the Jan. 1 cut-off. My K teacher told my mom that I would never succeed in school if I didn’t come out of my shell. I hated K because all we did was play (seriously – I was <em>dying</em> to learn how to read.) My 3rd grade teacher (I suspect) wanted to grade skip me. My parents didn’t mention it to me – told me about it years later – and were dead set against it. I was “saved” in 5th grade when our new and more experimental school decided to try the open classroom/mixed age fad. I <em>loved</em> it!! I was doing beyond 6th grade math by myself (there were a couple of other kids who were on individual do-math-at-your-own-pace program) and in 6th grade English. I think they kept the age grouping for phys ed, science, and social studies though I don’t really remember. Once a week, we were allowed to pick an activity from a selection (I think I picked music almost every time.) I hadn’t realized how bored I had been until I was placed by ability rather than age. 5th and 6th grade stand out as some of the most enjoyable school years of my life. Unfortunately, in 7th grade, it was back to the age-based classes. We did have tracking, so I was placed in advanced classes, but the pace was noticeably slower. </p>
<p>I think the lack of a grade skip was not a bad thing for me – I do recall wondering at the time if I was too young for college when I was transitioning into my freshman year, but I think it was just typical college adjustment jitters, but it does make me think that I would not have been ready for college a year earlier.</p>
<p>I often wonder if my D would have benefited from an environment where she was placed based on ability rather than “age”. </p>
<p>I know one of the complaints about tracking was that it was too inflexible, but the “differentiation in the classroom” certainly didn’t seem to work well for my daughter. In fact, when she was removed from the classroom to do a special assignment with a few other kids, she’d dawdle over it to extend the time that she was out of the regular classroom. This probably appeared to the teacher as though she were struggling with the more advanced work. (She told me about this years later, of course.)</p>
<p>Our school has a Sept 30 cutoff so 4 year olds can start K. S’ bday is is March so I didn’t give it much thought, D is mid August so I did confirm with her 4yo preschool teacher that she was ready, and sent her. She is in fact the youngest in her grade and some of her classmates are nearly two years older. She was also very big for her age, one of the larger kids even as the youngest. I think it hurts her a little in sports, but that’s it.</p>
<p>A local paper discusses this issue:</p>
<p>[Kindergarten</a> Redshirting | Columbus Parent](<a href=“http://www.columbusparent.com/content/stories/2010/07/21/hot-kindergarten-redshirting.html]Kindergarten”>http://www.columbusparent.com/content/stories/2010/07/21/hot-kindergarten-redshirting.html)</p>
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<p>The best advice we received was from our pediatrician. He said to think about our child in three areas. Socially ( do they have lots of friends in that grade or do they seem immature or anxious), academically ( compared to other preschoolers), and physically ( will they be smallest in class). If a child is ready in at least 2 areas send them; if ready in just one area wait.
Our child is now in high school and very happy. We have absolutely no regrets about our decision.</p>
<p>Our pediatrician was primarily concerned about our kids socially. S was rather at a loss figuring out how to play with other kids informally when he was in preschool. He was also small and wiry in stature. The pediatrician and we figured he could benefit from the extra time to grow physically and socially, even though academically, he was ready for kindergarten at age 3. We had no regrets holding him back. D was fine socially, but we really think S benefitted from having one more year of JR K instead of rushing to K. We also wanted them to remain 2 years apart in school since chronoligically they were 2 years apart. She was also petite. We feel she also really benefitted from that extra year in JR K.</p>
<p>I agree there is no one size fits all and it’s ideal if the parents and others knowledgable about the child with his/her best interests can confer about the pros and cons to reach the decision that seems best for the individual child. Physically large children often benefit from NOT being held back, so they won’t be even larger than peers. Academics and social aspects are important other considerations.</p>
<p>FWIW, my D’s social situation improved after the skip. She just fit better with the older kids.</p>