<p>I am sure that schools have a method to the madness of the application process, but what a difference a couple of months make! Like the old adage goes, “patience pays”. I just received an interview invite from U Chicago Pritzker, a school I was considering a “silent rejection”, because their admissions are “rolling” and they seemed to send interviews in the order the applications become complete and I have been complete for months. I thought that I was pretty much done with them and I did not bother to send any updates, etc (something that Pritzker specifically encourages you to do)</p>
<p>Chicago is one of the few top schools that gives a lot of merit money away, but to be perfectly honest I always liked Northwestern much better. I am off during most of january and I was planning to stay with some friends in Chicago for a week, so if I can squeeze the interview then it may be worth it. Let’s see how that goes.</p>
<p>MyO, don’t you just love it that you have an acceptance you’re happy with and don’t have to worry about interviews any more? I withdrew a bunch of applications (and would be plenty happy with Duke as my last interview) thanks to my Mizzou acceptance (since I’d go to Mizzou over the schools I withdrew from anyway). And it felt GREAT.</p>
<p>Kinda sweet to see lots of hard work pay off, and what a relief to have an acceptance in hand before the new year. I only wish my friends were as fortunate too.</p>
<p>All right guys, I have a small dilemma I think you can help with. And really, it’s a pretty great dilemma to have.</p>
<p>My parents are, understandably, very proud of me and my recent acceptance. I am very proud of myself and thrilled that this has been working out for me so well. But it really really bugs me that my parents–dad particularly–seems to be like, gloating about it to his buddies and his family (obviously they’re mine too). I can’t think of any specific examples, but to me it feels like the things he does and says are just like…without much tact. </p>
<p>As a kid who was always “the smart one” and whom parents/adults always doted upon for being “such a great kid” “so smart, responsible, going so far” etc, I’ve always been pretty sensitive to others believing that I perceive myself to be “better” because I’m (fill in the blank), when really that’s not the case at all. I don’t think I’m “better” than people who have talents like (fill in the blank) just because I’m smart or whatever. So to me, Dad’s gloating almost makes me self conscious–because in my mind, his behavior is reaffirming to those people that Kristin really does think she’s just the best one out there, which is an image I’ve worked hard not to have.</p>
<p>I have a feeling I should just essentially ignore it (after all, it’s only been a week, and I have a feeling it will subside soonish) and stay as polite and gracious as possible when I talk to other people who mention Dad’s talked to them. But I really don’t want people I care about–family friends, and family too–to think that I believe this accomplishment makes me just better than everyone else based on my dad’s behavior (and I get that impression already from my very competitive extended family).</p>
<p>^^^ I guess its understandable for parents to do that. They have spent a lot of $$$, hours helping you achieve your goals. The least you can do is let them act in whatever manner pleases them even if that means your dad gloating. Just ignore it, and don’t gloat around others.</p>
<p>I’m sure you’ve mastered the eyeroll by now, kristin. Employ it whenever Dad opens his mouth. Of course, this is being typed by a dad who wore his brand new Christmas present Bulldog Blue YSM polo to the family gathering. ;)</p>
<p>I totally understand how you’re feeling. As long as you maintain an air of humility (which I’m sure you do), then people will realize that it’s just a “parent thing.” </p>
<p>People can distinguish the difference between “obnoxious brainy/braggy student” and “proud parent.” They can see that you’re not out there tooting your own horn.</p>
<p>So, just do the eye roll…and be yourself. :)</p>
<p>Thanks guys, glad it seems like I’m at least in the ballpark of doing the right thing.</p>
<p>Why do families have to be so irksome? I have a younger cousin (her dad and my dad are quite competitive) who’s thinking about PA school (just a freshman this year). Wish you could have SEEN how obnoxious my cousin and uncle were being, practically teaming up against me making a case for how much more difficult it is to get into PA programs than medical school. I just bit my tongue. Oh yeah, and wore my med school sweatshirt to the family party the next day Felt a little bit vindictive about that one.</p>
<p>Next subject: lack of response from schools. I have a new theory, based on a conversation I had with my neighbor who just graduated from Feinberg (that’s Northwestern’s med school’s real name) 2 years ago. I mentioned how confused I was that I hadn’t heard from most of the schools I applied to–including ones that I was almost expecting to interview with, given how well I thought I fit their profile.</p>
<p>He applied to 14 schools “back in the day” with a “really high” (mom’s thinking it was 36+) MCAT and a high GPA from Boston College (plus all the standard clinical, non-clinical, extra curriculars, etc etc). Never heard a peep from the ones he practically expected to get interviews from (8), but got invited to interviews at all the elite programs he applied to (6)–he found this perplexing, as he expected the interviews to go the other way (lots of good ones, a few elite ones).</p>
<p>His theory was that he was almost “too good” an applicant for those schools he never heard from–that they read his application, figured he’d end up somewhere elite anyway, so why waste the time and resources interviewing him? If he weren’t one of the nicest, most humble guys I know, I probably would have written it off as some cocky thing to say to make himself feel better–but that’s just not who he is. And considering he’s quite familiar with this process, I figured I’d at least think about what he had to say.</p>
<p>So, veterans out there, do you think there’s any merit to this theory? Were you surprised to see your kids not get interviews at schools you’d swear they’d hear from, only for them to get more attention than expected from elite programs?</p>
You should be ashamed. And on Christmas, too? Gosh. May I suggest that you make an immediate soul-cleansing penitent act. Hmmmm. Calll her dad and tell him to have her send you her resume down the road and maybe you’ll hire her. She’s family and it’s the right thing to do. You’ll feel better, too.</p>
When DS’s cousin visited him in the summer last year and heard DS was preparing for MCAT, his comment: “I really do not understand why you want to pursue the medicine field. Don’t you know that the medicine field is not what it used to be?” DS even has not started to apply to any medical school yet. When DS applied to some private colleges (not admitted yet), one of his childhood-day friends said: “Don’t you know the students in that school are very pretentious?” DS never wanted to wear any shirt with school’s name on it after a few of these unpleasant experience, unless he was in his own campus. Heck…he wore Longhorn’s shirt more often than other shirts/coats at his school (not UT.) I do not know what goes in his mind when he does this (seeking his own identify while he was there? Proud Texans?)</p>
<p>Regarding the second issue you raised, DS did need to adjust his set of schools to apply to after he learned that his MCAT is higher than his original target score. Before the test, he targeted at 32-33, likely the average of the MCAT scores of the premeds from his school. However, since most of his IS schools do not require a secondary, he applied to almost all of them anyway. Every one still gave him interview invites. He did not apply to many lower-tiered OOS medical schools so he would not know what the results would be if he had applied.</p>
<p>Take my state schools for example. There’s five of them.</p>
<p>The least selective one (“School #5”) rejected me outright. School #4 put me on hold for a long time before inviting me to interview. School #3 waited and waited and waited and finally invited me. School #2 invited me, interviewed me, and promptly waitlisted me. School #1 invited me early, admitted me promptly.</p>
<p>*So, veterans out there, do you think there’s any merit to this theory? Were you surprised to see your kids not get interviews at schools you’d swear they’d hear from, only for them to get more attention than expected from elite programs? *</p>
<p>That makes sense… and it explains what happened to my friend’s son a couple of years ago. He was accepted to an ivy med, our top state med, and a couple of others, but he was outright rejected from one of the schools that he considered a bit of a safety (as much as a safety can be for med school…lol). He went to the ivy med and everyone was left scratching their heads about that odd rejection. He had 4 acceptances total (I think…maybe 5).</p>
<p>Talking about irksome families, every family gathering since I was a senior in high school was an extensive interrogation and then criticism of future plans. Thats when I decided its best to tell everyone I am anthro major and still undecided as to the future. Maybe I’ll take some time off and then see if I was interested in grad school. That stops them from questioning me about my GPA, MCAT, EC’s, then they just go off and mutter about what a failure I am :)</p>
<p>ChemFreak, LOVE it. I usually avoid all topics related to me and whether or not I’m successful at school. Generally I say something non-committal then change the subject to something less stressful. But a recent medical school acceptance makes that tough–especially in a bizarrely competitive family (the aforementioned uncle even went so far as to tell me that my cousin might change gears and be premed (not pre-PA or whatever) and in no uncertain terms insinuated that she’d get into a more competitive medical school than mine (Missouri). I was quick to point out that I may very well have acceptances coming later from three of the most elite programs in the country (a stretch, I’m sure), and good luck to her. Also felt nice to say!). Oh, my life is just so hard ;)</p>
It is really bad! This is a particularly fitting topic as it is a family gathering time right now.</p>
<p>When DS was in high school, many of his friends complained a lot about this. Those adults who are at the parent’s age really should reflect on this and try not to give youngsters so many troubles.</p>
<p>Really, the message I’m beaming at them while giving my non-committal response is, “It’s none of your business, leave me alone, I can fare quite well on my own thank you very much. I study hard because I want to, not so that I can have a higher GPA than your kids. And no, I don’t think I’m better than you because I’m good at school. And no, I don’t think your daughter is less of a person than I am because she sucks at calculus. And finally, I really couldn’t care less that you failed organic chemistry in the 80s and decided to be a business major instead. I just want to enjoy my spiked apple cider!”</p>
Felt a little bit vindictive about that one.</p>