a minimalist guide to packing for boarding school: NE boy formal dress code

GMC2918 I am glad to see I am not the only one already making lists and getting organized. My husband asked me why we can’t just go on Amazon prime and order whatever he needs at the end of the summer. . . Thank goodness I have other people who are planners and like to obsess over some things. .

In our house, the lists and planning serve the primary purpose of making me feel like I have done everything possible to ensure DS is comfortable, prepared, and happy. Pure emotional balm.

For me, so much better than free floating anxiety about what needs to get done AND whether I have done what I can to ensure it all starts well for the kiddo.

When I had three kids attending different BSs at the same time … my living room ( starting in mid July ) became a staging area that looked like a major military operation. My youngest is a sophomore in college now, and it was beyond liberating to finally remove the ******* Thule from the top of my car last year .

I actually feel ten years younger. Anyway- something to look forward to!

As I was getting dressed for church this AM, I thought of reminding sadieshadow and any other parents of boys to include some knit ties in the mix of neckwear during your BS wardrobe shopping.

Here’s a sample:
https://factory.jcrew.com/mens-clothing/ties_pocket_squares/ties/PRDOVR~33077/33077.jsp

Usually in cotton or silk. The silk ones are a bit hardier than the more traditional cloth silk ties.

One more tip, that I think was spoken to above (by skieurope?)…removing a tie by pulling the knot down through the “tail” of tie. This puts an unnecessary amount of strain on the thread that connects the two sides of the tie (which is hand sewn in nicer ties) and damage the tie. The proper way to remove a tie is the undo the knot.

I have found ridiculous prices at Macy’s online for the Spring sale. It ends 4/23. I got a couple of Ralph Lauren blazers for $29 (Searsucker) and $69 (olive wool plaid). The traditional blue blazer was more but marked down a lot and the quality was excellent. I also got socks. Question for you guys: how do you interpret “Dress” shoes. I remember at one school someone said dark soles … would topsiders or docksiders be considered dress (probably not). Boots are allowed in inclement weather. Shorts are only allowed during exams and only if the students have in general abided by the dress code all year. I guess it just isn’t that hot in the Berkshires anyway.

Dress shoes for BS boys? In our house that meant Sperry.

I interpret “dress” shoes as non-sneakers, non-slides, non-flip-flops…so hopefully boat shoe-type shoes will be sufficient. I was out and about with DS over the weekend and we stopped in a shoe store, so I could show him what actual “shoes” are, and the only shoes he deemed acceptable were the Sperrys and various boat shoes. Salisbury may be a little more laid back than Berkshire – they are allowed to wear Bermuda shorts on hot days during the fall and spring!

Handbook usually gives examples of what is considered acceptable and not. Leather docksiders would usually be OK; canvas ones, no.

I would get at least one pair of “dressier” shoes. Like a black cap toe lace up or something in that space.

FOR REFERENCE ONLY…WOULD NEVER ADVOCATE SPENDING THAT MUCH FOR A TEEN BOY:
http://www.allenedmonds.com/shoes/mens-shoes/oxford-derby-shoes/park-avenue-cap-toe-oxfords/SF270.html

OR THIS (AGAIN, FOR REFERENCE ONLY):
http://shop.nordstrom.com/s/to-boot-new-york-senato-penny-loafer-men/3224372?origin=category-personalizedsort&fashioncolor=BROWN%20LEATHER

For dress-code conforming but not that dressy shoes, I would also look at something like a buck or saddle shoe oxford (in more conservative colors).
http://www.zappos.com/p/g-h-bass-co-noah-dirty-buck-taupe-nubuck/product/8910515/color/701909?ef_id=V2LGygAAAF7yUjOp:20170420130507:s

Also…not that cheap, but the cole haan line of “zero grand” shoes has a dress enough feel but a “fun” sole that make it a nice option…they feel more like sneakers on your feet.
https://www.colehaan.com/mens-originalgrand-wingtip-oxford-woodbury-ivory/C20778.html?dwvar_C20778_color=Woodbury-ivory&dwvar_C20778_width=#cgid=mens_originalgrand&start=7

Any suggestions on toiletries? Razors, etc.? I’ve only had girls go in the past. What do boys use to carry their stuff around?

I think I had some nylon dopp kit. IMO, the key thing is to have one that’s lined…so that if anything does leak, it’s not going to ruin everything in the larger bag (like clothes).

Something like this:
https://www.jcrew.com/p/E3144

@HMom16 We drive S to school, so his toiletries are mostly in a shower caddy. He can bring it to the bathroom and back, or just grab what he needs. Some schools/bathrooms have storage shelves. He usually leaves it on top of his dresser. He uses an electric razor that has a case. For travel he uses vinyl toiletry case. I have an LL Bean hanging toiletry case when I travel (I have a large one and small one).

Yes, MA2012 is right about the shower caddy (at least for storage/transport at school) …I was thinking more in terms of “when he travels home”.

Forgot to mention desert boots as a nice alternative to boat shoes. And as I mentioned to one parent recently via PM: I would not let any teen boy have only one default pair of “dress code” shoes…especially if they are boat shoes and he generally goes sockless in them…that is the fast lane to one very smelly pair of shoes/room.

Forgot to mention chelsea boots, in either dress config or a more casual variant like a Blundstone. Blunnies are a great shoe, IMO.

I will second cole Haan for shoes. I’m not sure if you have an outlet near you but we got DS a pair of gorgeous brown dress shoes with red laces for a little fun at the outlet for like $50.

DS will bring a pair of desert boots:
https://www.jcrew.com/p/79438?color_name=anchor-grey
and leather Sperrys:
https://www.jcrew.com/p/13508?color_name=mercury-grey
And that’s probably it, other than sneakers & flip-flops. “Class dress” at St. George’s allows sneakers, leather flip-flops and shorts, so it’s not as restrictive as some other places. Just exceedingly preppy, wow B-)

@gmc2918 No Tims or Beanboots? My daughter’s tell me those are “required” (but maybe St. George’s different).

@HMom16 for boys? I don’t think those are DS 's style, but maybe he’ll change his tune when he gets there. Also, I’ve learned a valuable lesson from my daughter’s experience and I won’t let DS bring more than what he needs for the current season. So Bean boots (or Blundstones maybe?) will be up for discussion later. When DD went away, she bought clothes to outfit her for what seemed like all 4 years! And of course by week 3, she decided that 75% of what she had was “wrong”. DS is much more confident in his look/personal style, and probably won’t stray too far from his uniform, but we will still start off with the absolute bare minimum for him.

PS - I may have inadvertently ruined Bean boots for my kids forever, because of the photos of me growing up in the 70s & 80s in suburban Massachusetts. A typical outfit: Vaccaro turtleneck, fairisle sweater, corduroy wrap skirt, argyle socks, painted barrettes holding back aggressively kinked hair, and all finished off with clogs, Bean boots or bluchers. Growing up in NYC, they literally think that my middle-school self could have been an extra in Borat’s home village.

@GMC2918 oh yes - for boys - they are the winter version of sperry’s when the snow get more than ankle deep.

Do kids wear robes? I am assuming boys do not. Got “bath sheet” size towels as my kid is big.

Do you mean as a cover-up from the room to the shower? Can’t speak for the girls, but for the boys, it’s a rarity, though not unheard of. Generally, it’s a towel or shorts.