<p>I agree. My original response W-A-Y back was for OP to find out exactly how the school’s assessment of her situation varies from her original information, and I know many here have stated similar views. We can all guess from now 'til the cows come home, but only the school can give you the info you need, fairfielder. It’s good to find out all you can before you talk to them, but you must talk to them. I don’t suggest the email as a starting point. I suggest a discussion of the situation. You need to listen to what they have to say, and IF there are things that you feel are off-base, you can address those things. However, if you hear them tell you that they are looking at your situation realistically but in a way with which you disagree, you may need to accept that their policies are what they are. You can try to appeal with a written letter after the discussion, but understand that it may not make a difference.</p>
<p>Fairfield: I think almost everyone here is giving you sincere, smart and good advice. What you need to do is figure out a way to present factual information, such as that which you and anyone else can see on your 1040 form, and stop telling “the story” to financial aid people. We get it, they get it. </p>
<p>One thing that GT may be factoring in is the annual total of your daughter’s SSA survivor benefit, the one that will end when she graduates from high school and has been receiving since the unfortunate death of her father. For example, her benefit could have been $1500 a month x 12 = $18000/yr in 2010. Maybe GT is including this money in some calculation. Those funds plus your $32K in interest could have pushed your 2010 household income to $50K although of course, the SSA money was your daughter’s. </p>
<p>I do not know about the “money flowing” philosophy. Like you, I am mid 50s and a widow and a single parent of two children, and my D attends an instate public. Money flows in my house because I work two jobs, including every weekend. My D receives generous financial aid and I still work two jobs to cover the part of her expenses not covered by that. WELCOME TO THE CLUB! You have referenced “a nose to the grindstone job” and “a factory job” in two separate postings, and I wonder why that is.</p>
<p>Another resource might be grandparents or aunts or uncles; do you have a boyfriend who might be able to contribute? </p>
<p>I certainly understand your wanting to send your child to the best possible school. We all want that. In your case, when you talk and write to the financial aid officer at any school, provide more numbers than words.</p>
<p>Fairfielder, our son was also accepted EA at Georgetown SFY, his dream school.</p>
<p>The Georgetown financial aid letter just came in at “0”.</p>
<p>Although we are in a far stronger position financially, we can’t afford a first-class seat at Georgetown either.</p>
<p>Sadly, our son is going to have to opt for one of his financial safeties instead of Georgetown.</p>
<p>We are all heart sick at our house.</p>
<p>GlobalMom, it will all be fine. I have one kid at a tip top elite LAC and one at the honors college of our flagship state univ. One is not getting a better education than the other. Which one will be more advantaged out there in the so-called “real world”? The one that’s most focused on what they want to achieve. (I’d put good money on the one at the state univ. ;))</p>
<p>QUOTE from OP: In my letter I’ll take out references to the senior trip (how to explain that I won’t have internet access for ten days?)</p>
<p>Where in Italy are you going? Are you taking these kids off the beaten track for ten days or to larger cities? There should be plenty of internet cafes, computers in hotel lobbies, and maybe some of the kids or the other adults will have laptops. Simply log in to your email, print the GT note out, read it offline, and then compose notes for a response. And email them back.</p>
<p>Our Honors College is the #1 drinking/party school in the U.S. Life revolves around tailgating, football, booze, fraternities, and sororities.</p>
<p>Would you rather have your very talented, hard working kid, whose dream is to become a diplomat, at Georgetown or Booze U?</p>
<p>I started at a community college and graduated from a totally unprestigious state flagship with a “party school” reputation of its own. I recently accepted a federal government job and have a fistful of admit letters from the top graduate schools in the field.</p>
<p>Where your child goes to college is 100,000 times less important than what they ultimately DO in college. The opportunity to succeed is everywhere - it just might take a little more sweat equity and self-control at some places. Ignore the parties, reject the boozer culture and work your tail off.</p>
<p>The fact is, of 27 million college students in the U.S., only 4 million of those attended a private, non-profit school. The vast majority of Americans who go to college do so at public colleges and universities. Your family is not alone in coming face to face with the fact that private colleges are unaffordably expensive.</p>
<p>“Our Honors College is the #1 drinking/party school in the U.S. Life revolves around tailgating, football, booze, fraternities, and sororities.”</p>
<p>“Where your child goes to college is 100,000 times less important than what they ultimately DO in college.”</p>
<p>I have read about studies that show that peers exert a heavy influence on academic success.</p>
<p>GlobalMom, if your son has the right stuff for a career in diplomacy, he doesn’t have to hang around the partiers. At any large university, no matter what the reputation, there are many, many students who are not part of the drinking & party scene. </p>
<p>I do have a kid who is a college grad focused on IR, and I really have to reiterate that an elite school for undergrad is not nearly as important as having a good foundation for grad school, and picking up some international travel/living experiences along the way (such as study abroad and internships abroad), as well as gaining fluency in one or more foreign languages, including at least one UN language, to the extent possible. </p>
<p>I’d note that many of the advanced degree programs prefer that their students have several years of work experience before enrolling. So the education & career path can very well look like this:</p>
<p>college (BA) —> internship* or job related to IR ---->Masters or Ph.D program –> career position</p>
<p>It is very difficult to get a good IR-related paying job straight out of college – when my d. applied for a paying job with a US Govt. agency, they offered an unpaid internship that sounded amazing, but she turned it down because she needed a paying job. She does now have an excellent job with a private agency that works closely with the UN, but she is the only person currently there who got hired to an entry level position straight out of undergrad – her coworkers with similar positions had internships or fellowships after college before being hired. So you might add to my chart above a possible 1-2 years with a Fulbright or a stint in the Peace Corps – neither of which brings in much money. </p>
<p>I don’t know what your kid’s other college options are, but there are other good options besides Georgetown, including many that will offer substantial merit aid to any kid capable of getting into Georgetown SFS.</p>
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Individuals who are heavily influenced by peers are probably not cut out for the diplomatic service, where it is very important to be able to function consistently and independently in foreign and sometimes hostile cultures.</p>
<p>I have no doubt that’s true. But this isn’t high school. You can choose whom you associate with in college, no matter where you are.</p>
<p>Spend Friday nights in the library instead of the bars. Get a room in a substance-free dorm. Ignore the morons bragging about how awesome it was to stumble back at 3 am and puke their guts out. (Protip: it’s really not. Experience speaking.) Attend morning colloquia and graduate student defenses. Talk to professors at office hours. Seek research internships. Develop your own projects. Stand out like a beacon in the sea of iniquity.</p>
<p>GlobalMom, ultimately of course we all have to take advantage of the opportunities we have. You know that thing they say about talent – there are two kinds; the talent you’re born with and the talent to know what to do with the talent you’re born with, and the second one is the most important.</p>
<p>Same goes for pretty much everything. Which is not to say I do not sympathize with the feelings in your house at this time. I certainly do.</p>
<p>Since your child has the talent and the drive, he will do well wherever he starts out. This is just the beginning.</p>
<p>My kids both live in a world of booze at their different colleges. You can work around it. My son chose to live in the sub-free dorm his freshman year and looking back (he’s now a junior) that was a great choice for him. He loved that dorm and made his best friends there, and still rooms with or near several of them in the upperclass dorms.</p>
<p>My daughter moved off campus at her large state univ after her freshman year. That put the partying all at a greater remove.</p>
<p>Both kids have their own circle of friends that is made up of a variety of people – some drinkers, some not – but they do have control over where they are and with whom. Drinking is a part of college everywhere – except maybe very conservative religious colleges.</p>
<p>Loving the implication that Georgetown students don’t party…</p>
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<p>I think this may be correct. If so, the following years may be more generous with financial aid. Also, if her SSA money has been invested, it may yield quite a substantial student contribution. Her assets will be more heavily weighted than yours.</p>
<p>The solution Georgetown may have in mind is for the OP to get a job. She is 59 and, for all intents and purposes, financially independent. As things stand, she has the freedom not to have to work … but not if she wants a Georgetown education for her daughter. </p>
<p>We’re talking about $51K minus whatever her daughter can earn (summers and term time), minus subsidized student loans. Maybe the high school has an opening for someone they’ve known as a parent and volunteer. If the OP cannot find a $40K job, then get a lower-paying job and work more years. Or choose a less expensive school. </p>
<p>It’s hard for me to imagine a competent financial aid officer stating an unqualified “worst case scenario” over the telephone so early in the process. I hope the OP recorded that person’s name and the date.</p>
<p>I dont think it is so easy for a 59YO with no job history to find a job. Is she able to stand on her feet all day at Starbucks? I think that type of thinking by anyone is somewhere between insenstive and arrogant. I do think OP should say she has been looking for a job. What could she hope to get? Teachers aid? She may not have quals for that? Are there any openings? If you dont think there is job discrimination against older people, I do not agree. </p>
<p>Shes 59. With no job history other than volunterring.</p>
<p>I think she has to make it clear that her volunteering got her kid the free ride at HS. Otherwise the college may be thinking she came up with the money some other way.</p>
<p>The OP probably didn’t present all the info in that earlier phone call. My guess is that she might have called and asked about her $32K income and the home equity, not realizing that her assets would be counted as well. Since she doesn’t have a bank account, but rather signed away all her assets in exchange for promissory notes, she probably doesn’t think of that money as an “asset”. (It’s a problem, because depending on the terms of the notes, the money may not be available to her – the principal payment on the notes isn’t due until the date specified in the note – so for example if the notes specify interest only payments at 10% for 15 years, with the balance payable sometime after the year 2200 … she’s got no recourse if she wants to get back her money and her supposed benefactors balk.)</p>
<p>The college isn’t making moral judgments or worried about whether she gets a job or not. That’s not how need based aid works. They are following their policies and formulas. They may be attributing the value of the high school tuition as income, depending on whether they knew about that arrangement – but I still think it’s more likely that they just attributed a larger asset value based on the interest payments she was getting. That interest income-to-asset attribution is a common and well established practice in financial aid calculations. No one is going to see $32K income and think that it represents only $300K at 10% interest – those rates are unheard of in the present economy. Unless the OP explained that specifically in the CSS Profile or in a letter previously presented to the financial aid office, I think it is extremely likely that any college would attribute a greater value to the assets generating the interest.</p>
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<p>It is certainly difficult for anyone to get a job and I agree it’s particularly difficult for a 59YO without work experience to get a job. We’re talking about a job though, not a career. I see lots of middle-aged workers at places such as Walmart, Starbucks and Lowes. These days I’m seeing more and more workers past retirement age re-entering the work force. Many of us are the OP’s age and working 60 plus hours a week. It would be very difficult for the OP to join the workforce but isn’t that what most of us do to earn money? I’m not sure why that is so insensitive and arrogant. </p>
<p>That being said, I understand there may well be extenuating circumstances preventing the OP from being able to get a job. But, it is a reasonable way for most people to earn money, even us middle-aged folks who are likely to outlive the pubic largess and our assets.</p>
<p>59 is at the top end of middle age in my book. I know its a lot harder for me to things I did at 50, including standing on my feet all day.</p>