“Or at a law firm when we are on deadline to file a brief in the Supreme Court.”
Does not take that much! The securities attorney at one of my previous jobs would yell obscenities at folks pretending to be stock analysts calling him with questions trying to fish out financial details prior to earnings releases. The calls always began in the later part of the day - I guess it was when the work day began in their neck of the woods. 
TatinG: That’s such racist and demeaning nonsense. Anyone can speak appropriately. Anyone.
“ucbalumnus: Be sure to turn off the TV when it has a politician’s speech if you do not want to hear profanity. It appears that politicians (on all sides and parties) have decided that use of swear words helps them gain political support, so they are not going to stop. Of course, when powerful leaders lead by example, it should not be surprising that it becomes more socially acceptable generally.”
Exactly. We allow this nonsense as normal and it filters in everywhere including upward as kids grow up with it. Tacky and not appropriate for the office. I don’t care who you are or what office.
“mastery of vocabulary”
Oh. please. Many people swear and still have quite advanced vocabularies. So many generalizations on this thread, including…
“black kids shouldn’t/couldn’t be disciplined for using vulgar language like ‘f’ or 'mf”
I find it really appalling that this is even on this thread. Even if it was said to you, why are you repeating such utter crap here? Stuff like this is more offensive than any swear word I can think of.
You misunderstand. This is what the high school teachers told me. It is not what I said. It absolutely happened. It is an example of foul language that wasn’t disciplined or stopped in school. Sorry that the truth of the event offends you.
No. I understood you were telling a “story” but I wouldn’t find it worth repeating other people’s garbage that is much more offensive than the silly words folks here worry about.
Who, besides me, is is remembering Tom Wolfe’s description in “I am Charlotte Simmons” of the fraternity boy f–bomb patois and the sorority girl s-bomb patois?
My social circle for four decades has included a half dozen one time literature students, all of whom became professors at hoity-toity universities, and use this sort of patois in their everyday speech with friends. They have pretty amazing, and sometimes offensively vulgar, vocabularies in many languages. I guess they have their reasons for using this language when they do. They don’t use it in the classroom or around any children or around our elders who might be offended. Of course, sadly there are fewer and fewer of those elders every year.
I am liking everything garland and doschicos have written here. They are just words. My friends almost never deliberately offend.
adding: although I was raised not to even use slang, I’ve become a horrible potty mouth myself from hanging out with all these miscreants for so many years. It does rub off.
I agree.
The people who claim it’s a matter of vocabulary are the worst hypocrites. They never make such an argument if someone say says “ I dropped my dang book” but use the f-bomb instead and those moralizers will start spouting off about it being a need for a richer vocabulary. When I called a friend on this she claimed that she made the same comments to people who said “ dang” …um no, she did not. She was caught in her own absurd argument and then felt the need to lie about it.
Cohen v California 1971
FCC v Pacifica 1978
Fox v FCC 2012
There are taboo words. But to me, the greater obscenity is the grand content of speech that has the effect of disparaging entire groups, like women or immigrants or specific demographic groups, because of whatever it is that the speaker has decided is a negative thing.
Frankly, I’d rather hear the occasional F bomb than the broader expression of hate that seems to have become more acceptable of late.
I was going to post about the creative work of one of the attorneys I know, but apparently CC deemed the link to the USPTO search results “too sexy for its shirt.” The trademark was eventually allowed - the attorney argued that the word in the band’s name was “freaking,” supporting the argument with a Google search that showed plenty of hits. Yeah, right, we know what they REALLY meant. 
I’ve noticed a huge increase in the use of crude language in the last 10-15 years. I do find it offensive, especially around young children and elders. Doesn’t anyone know what F or MF (C, CS, etc.,etc.) means? (Silly me–I can’t help thinking of the meanings of words when I hear them. It’s like a porn assault sometimes…) F-bombers are people I want to avoid. I find this sort of talk degrading and even threatening at times. I wish more people would aim to be considerate of others in public, and teach their children to do the same. Instead we have everyone defending their right to behave badly.
"doschicos: “mastery of vocabulary”
Oh. please. Many people swear and still have quite advanced vocabularies. So many generalizations on this thread, including…"
Actually, not buying that. Certainly not what I see and I’m around a large variety of people of vastly differing educational levels.
“doschicos: No. I understood you were telling a “story” but I wouldn’t find it worth repeating other people’s garbage that is much more offensive than the silly words folks here worry about.”
You entirely miss the point. A school official TOLD her this. Do you not get that? And you want to jump down the messenger’s throat? So you are fine with this sort of racism and classism being institutionalized, suggesting certain kids just aren’t able to overcome their poor examples in order to speak appropriately?
I’m not.
“Maya: The people who claim it’s a matter of vocabulary are the worst hypocrites. They never make such an argument if someone say says “ I dropped my dang book” but use the f-bomb instead and those moralizers will start spouting off about it being a need for a richer vocabulary. When I called a friend on this she claimed that she made the same comments to people who said “ dang” …um no, she did not. She was caught in her own absurd argument and then felt the need to lie about it.”
I see your point.
But actually the truest hypocrites are the ones who edit themselves in front of others because they know it is inappropriate and offensive. Why not stop because it is inappropriate and offensive so you don’t have to perform for your audiences and can just be yourself?
I definitely use some of that language with friends but I’m pretty good at flipping the switch in my mind and not using those words around children, at work, or in public places. I used to be a teacher so maybe that’s when that switch was created in my brain!
I know some people say, “oh, they’re just words” and others find them offensive. So my position is that I don’t know who is offended by them and who is not when I’m around strangers or people I don’t know well. So out of respect for others, I don’t use them in those settings. Whether I find them offensive or not isn’t the point IMO. I don’t get to dictate how others feel and I can choose to take their feelings into consideration even if I might have different feelings myself.
I personally dislike when people sitting near me in a public place use a lot of curse words. Honestly, I just hate that I can always hear people’s conversations these days. Nobody speaks quietly anymore. That’s why restaurants are so darn loud all the time!
I’m one of the hypocrites who uses an occasional swear word around my family, but never does so in public.
But I’m not offended by people who swear. I just think it’s dull to use the F word in every sentence. I feel the same way about the use of the word “like.” Like this, is, like, a, like boring sentence.
In my opinion “inappropriate and offensive” are situational. I’m a southern mama who raised children in the north east. My kids learned as soon as they could talk to use “yes ma’am, no sir” in the south, like all the other polite children, and never use those phrases in the north east, where it was generally considered rude back talk.
Friends with extensive vocabularies don’t use all their big words all the time. They use them with friends who talk the same way, not with friends who would find such speech pedantic and pretentious, and thus offensive though certainly no offense is ever intended. It is just their normal way of talking but they definitely edit depending on the group.
I just see it as good manners to adjust speech to the environment, not hypocritical. We are all performing for an audience all the time, imho. That is just life. Good manners is making others comfortable when possible. (“when possible” is a whole thread/book unto itself, just like “they are just words” )
I’m 62, and can actually remember the exact moment when I was 45 and decided I wasn’t fighting the F-bomb battle any longer. Over time my ideas on language have evolved a whole lot.
Staring daggers at the offending party often works wonders.
Everyone code-switches. I don’t understand why taking into account the feelings of others would be considered hyporcritical. What a sad way to think about thoughtfulness.