Has anyone sent their kids to an admitted student overnight alone? I had been planning to go, but my DD’s top choice has a two night overnight and the school has reserved a train for the ride there. Also, I was not sure how many schools I should let her visit. Visiting three or more schools at this point seem unhealthy to me. Opinions?
My son will be traveling (driving alone) to do an overnight at the school he has chosen later this month. I see no reason to accompany him. It is an excellent way to get a good feel for what the school is like.
Are you happy with your DD’s top choice? Is it a good fit in terms of finance, academics, and social? Is your DD still waffling greatly between a number of schools, or does she feel confident that she will enroll in #1 choice? I think it’s good to go to top choice school and revisit one more time. And if she hasn’t seen the other choices at all, or if she is hesitant to make her final decision, you may want to send her to a second school also.
I think this is a good time to let DD travel alone. It will give her a more realistic feel of what it might be like to attend there.
I wouldn’t have a problem sending my daughter to an overnight, as long as I was comfortable with the area she would be staying. Also, right now is crunch time to decide, and visiting three or more schools might be necessary to make a decision. I wouldn’t want it to interfere much with current classes, though.
I think it’s great for kids to make the trip alone. Can figure in their decision-making.
In 2009, my older daughter visited three colleges to which she had been admitted. She went to one with my husband and the other two on her own. One of the latter two involved an overnight train ride there, flight back; the other was both ways by plane. She did fine.
In 2011, my younger daughter visited four colleges to which she had been admitted. She made two of the trips alone, by plane; one by car with my husband (then unemployed); and one by plane and rental car with my husband. Again, she did fine on all the trips.
My D went to one alone (first choice school requiring a flight) and my mom drove her to one in a neighboring state and visited friends while D was taking classes and doing the overnight. I had been to both schools. S traveled alone to his first choice school in January. We had done a comprehensive visit together in September so I had done my part and was comfortable with the choice already. Similarly, I had traveled to D’s first choice and spent 3 days on campus in an earlier visit so there was nothing else that I needed to see to be comfortable. I think it’s great for the kid to go alone and have their own experience as long as you don’t feel like you still need to do your own due diligence.
I just sent my daughter by herself for an overnight. She couldn’t make the admitted student day, so we set up a visit just for her. It worked out very well. She was a bit nervous on hey way to the college She had a connecting flight but I made sure she had plenty of time between the flights. Then when she got to the college, no one was there to meet her. After an hour or so, she got nervous but everything worked out fine. Thereafter, she had a great visit and she felt confident on her trip back home navigating the same airports. I’m glad D went by herself.
D had narrowed her choices down to three schools, she previously had visited one. She visited the two schools she had not seen.
I think making that trip alone can be a good test for the kid to see if they feel ready to be farther away and navigate different places by themselves. If parents are there to arrange shuttles or hail cabs the reality of it might not set in.
Send her! I agree it is a good growing up experience and test.
And the college provides airport shuttles and an overnight place to stay, yes? She will be well cared for.
Yep, my kids went on their own. Both kids chose to make their final decisions among two schools.
Yep - for admitted students they will stay in the dorm and usually have a shuttle.
I traveled to two admitted student events with my son, but did not accompany him on campus. He did the following entirely on his own, for a third: 1) Took train from nearby his boarding school to major regional airport; 2) Flew across country, arriving late and staying at a motel near the Portland (OR) airport; 3) negotiating train into downtown Portland, and then transferring to transportation out to Salem for Willamette; 4) After Willamette event, traveling back into Portland, and staying in a Youth Hostel there for a night in order to see some of the city (he had also been waitlisted at Reed); 5) Traveling back to East Coast, with same flight and train arrangements. His school arranged transportation to and from closest train station. I can’t remember whether he had to change flights en route. Once he made his decision, he traveled on his own to an event over the summer. He obtained his own AAA card in order to rent through AAA’s agreement with Hertz; drove himself to a small airport, that handles budget flights; booked an inexpensive motel near his college; drove himself to and from airport more than an hour from campus. The college offered a stipend which covered most of his expenses.
More than forty years ago, I took a bus ride from near my boarding school to stay at Hampshire College with a friend, and explore the five-college consortium on my own. I had not yet turned seventeen.
Wow on car rental and hotel stay. Those can be hard to book for a minor. I got the kid and airbnb walking distance from campus for his cross country visit and he cabbed it from the airport. I had to do some searching to find a place that would let him stay on his own.
Depends on the location and your and his/her comfort level. Between my two kids, one went on a scholarship weekend by plane for several days by herself and I went with her to another visit by plane. The latter was a little tricky since it was a very large city so I acted as “parent” for several other kids who happened to be on our plane. It was a hard to figure the shuttle but I’m sure between the six of them they would have finally managed. Then, we’ve been to two driving trips with my younger kid and one other by plane. It really varies in how many kids are there with parents or solo. Is there a separate program for the parents? If not, and your child seems alright going alone then, go ahead and send them. You can also try to find out if there will be a school rep who will meet them on the other side. I don’t think it’s customary for them to meet the kids.
We have done 2-3 revisit for admitted students. They were their top schools and all admitted visits have provided so much more information than the initial info session and tour.
Willamette is great as the train is directly adjacent to campus and Portland MAX is really convenient. That is still a great test if independent living!
I wish I had consulted you all before Willamette’s admitted student event. I accompanied D on that trip but felt rather out of place. Willamette had events for parents but I think D would have gotten more out of the trip if I weren’t there.
No matter, Willamette has been scratched off the list.
AAA has a set agreement with Hertz: they have to rent to any licensed driver over 18 with membership, credit card, and valid license. My son and I made a point of calling the airport rental office to confirm all this ahead of time. I’ve heard that individual franchises or agents can give kids a hard time, but it’s part of AAA’s deal with Hertz. There are less expensive options, of course, but not guaranteed for younger drivers. The same thing goes with hotels. It helps for the kid to have his or her own credit and/or debit cards, and for a parent to call and speak with the hotel once the room is booked.
Way back when I was in high school - I did all my senior year college visits by myself. Not that they had the big hooplah for accepted students then.
I took my kids to the colleges, but for most of the accepted student events I stayed very much in the background. There were some meals for parents, but there were a lot of activities, just for the kids. Harvard would only let the parents come for one presentation to which the kids weren’t invited - otherwise they were expected to stay away. (I went and visited my brother!)
I do think this is a good time for them to learn how to navigate on their own. Hopefully they’ve done some already. My kids for example had learned to commute into NYC.
What do you deem as “unhealthy”? Has she shown previous irresponsibility? You know come September, she’ll be able to book weekends away with her friends any time she wishes, right?
If you DD expresses the desire to go to the 3, let her. At 17, I flew into NYC and did a tour of accepted colleges by myself – a combo of trains and buses once I got into NYC.