Advice for my Brother

College Search & Selection
1

<p>So a little background:</p>

<p>I graduated HS in 2005 with a good gpa, 700Math/700Verbal SAT, and was recruited to play soccer at an Ivy League school. The college application process was very straightforward for me, as I knew where I wanted to go, had the grades, and was recruited - early decision and done.</p>

<p>My brother however, is now a senior. He has a 3.6 gpa out of 4.3 and he has struggled with his SATs. After his first try Junior Year, he scored very low (1450). I figured that he would be as proactive as I was with studying, but I realized that he and my parents were not prepared to take this on.</p>

<p>I came up with a studying strategy for his next try and he improved to 1640 - 550M, 550W,540R (hey, improvement). I've also come up with a strategy for his applications and list of colleges. I realize that he should be doing most of this on his own, but I really wanted to get him into a decent school, and then try to get him to be more self sufficient from there...</p>

<p>I just want to make sure that I am on the right track with my advice. I have advised him to apply to smaller liberal arts colleges, take general req's his first year and then start working toward a major. He leans toward Government/PoliSci, but I've told him to keep an open mind. </p>

<p>Here is his list of colleges... does this look like he is on the right track? (east coast, small liberal arts)</p>

<p>------Safety-------
McDaniel College
Goucher College
Wagner college
Umass Amherst</p>

<p>--------Middle --------
St. Mary's college of md
Washington College
St Johns - Annapolis
Ursinus College
Fairfield University
Clark University</p>

<p>-------Reach--------
Lafayette
Union College
Hampshire College
Fordham University
American University</p>

<p>Also, is there any way to help get him prepared for college life (books, visits, summer comm college courses, etc?).... Thanks for all your help everyone! Very much appreciated!</p>

2

<p>State of residency and cost constraints?</p>

<p>If cost and financial aid are important, put “net price calculator” and “financial aid estimator” in each school’s web site search box.</p>

<p>Some of the schools that you list (particularly St. John’s College) have unusual curricula, so your brother needs to check to see if they are suitable for him.</p>

<p>

</p>

<p>Once he gets to college, he should check to see if any of the majors he is considering has a long chain of prerequisites that needs to be started early, so that he does not unintentionally shut himself out of a major he may want to do.</p>

<p>Additionally, schools (especially smaller ones) may only offer certain courses once per year (instead of once every semester) or even once every two years, so he should check to see if any courses needed for any of his possible majors is like that; if so, he should take it as soon as it is offered.</p>

3

<p>I’m sorry I can’t help you with your question as I am not very familiar with LAC’s, but I wanted to say that you are a great person for helping your brother like you are and he is very lucky to have a brother like you. :)</p>

4

<p>“Also, is there any way to help get him prepared for college life”</p>

<p>One of the most useful things you can do is help/encourage him to develop the time-management and study skills that he will need in college. Pay attention to how well he is handling his courses now. Does he use a planning device (wall calendar, pocket agenda, calendar in his cell phone, etc.) at all, or does he “wing it”? Has he been developing study strategies that work for him (good note-taking, audio recordings of materials, flash cards, etc.), or is it pretty much hit-or-miss? At his age, these skills may not be very advanced, but if you see no clear trends at all encourage him to meet with the guidance counselor at his school and with his teachers so that he can get advice about better ways to manage his time and his course load.</p>

<p>Along that same line, do your best to help him understand that the help centers at the college he ends up at are there for just that reason: to help students master the skills they need to do well in college. Walking into the writing center or math center is not a sign of intellectual or moral weakness, but rather a sign that the student has his/her head screwed on straight.</p>

<p>Looking back over the SAT prep time you put in with him, if you think there is any evidence at all that he has trouble interpreting text (not even all the time, just some of the time), encourage him to ask his guidance counselor to arrange an evaluation for reading issues. Smart, hardworking kids who do well in the classroom but not so well on standardized exams often turn out to have un-diagnosed processing disorders, and it is easier to get formal help with this while he is still in high school.</p>

<p>Lastly, keep on loving this brother of yours. When the hand of life was dealt, the set of cards he got was significantly different from the hand you got. There is every chance that his hand has entire suits in it that you couldn’t even have imagined existed - certainly it has plenty of cards that he hasn’t even discovered he has yet. As his brother, part of your job is to remind him to look at the cards in his own hands and not be miffed that he didn’t get someone else’s. Once he figures out what he does have and how to play them, he may well beat everyone else at the table.</p>

5

<p>Except for UMass (if instate), you have a lot of expensive privates on your list. Since many (maybe all) of those schools do not “meet need”, do you know if your parents are prepared to pay big bucks for your brother to attend those schools? </p>

<p>What state are you in?</p>

<p>What is the budget that your parents are willing to spend?
(You went to an ivy which has excellent “meets-need” aid. Your brother isn’t likely going to get that benefit. If your parents aren’t willing to spend a lot of money, then your list will need to be altered. Your family may be thinking that your brother is going to get the same aid you got, and more likely he won’t.)</p>

<p>Why are you limiting to mostly smallish privates (except for UMass)? </p>

<p>What does your brother like to do outside of academics? </p>

<p>There are schools that USNews has identified as A+ Schools for B Students…many of those are larger schools.</p>

6

<p>KevinV,</p>

<p>I don’t have much to contribute beyond the wealth of information you have already been given, but I just wanted to say that you and I are very similar. It appears you might become more accomplished than myself, given the brief academic history presented in your OP, but still we are very similar.</p>

<p>I cracked up where you mentioned how you’ve developed a strategy for your brother’s college admissions. I have a younger brother also preparing for admissions, who is weak in certain areas and strong in others, and I too have developed a strategy that I think will get him into a lot of reach and match schools.</p>

<p>I agree that he should be doing this himself, but I can’t help it. We share very similar sentiments here. I want to see my brother become more self sufficient and I think that begins with a good LAC. I’m steering him away from the publics where he might get distracted by the large number of people.</p>

<p>And yes, I get frustrated when it seems that I am more motivated in seeing through his college admissions than he is.</p>

7

<p>See my post here:</p>

<p><a href=“http://talk.collegeconfidential.com/college-search-selection/1231275-nerdy-but-not-techy-science-schools-my-lil-brother.html[/url]”>http://talk.collegeconfidential.com/college-search-selection/1231275-nerdy-but-not-techy-science-schools-my-lil-brother.html&lt;/a&gt;&lt;/p&gt;

<p>I also developed a special SAT strategy for him. haha</p>

8

<p>Hey all… thanks for your helpful input. I appreciate that there are others out there in similar positions.</p>

<p>UCBalumnus— He lives in NJ… and I live in DC. I’m not sure if there is any way that he would be able to switch residency to my place, in order to take advantage of their national in-state tuition options. (anyone have insight on this? DC residents get in-state tuition across the country)</p>

<p>In terms of cost, my parents are willing to pay for a lot of it. My brother will likely take on about 3k in loans per year - just enough to appreciate the cost of college. They have done decently well for themselves, despite not having gone through the college experience themselves. Financial assistance is the one thing they have always been there for. </p>

<p>OhioMom - Thanks! Always nice to hear encouraging words.</p>

<p>happymomof1 - Very good advice. He does much better with time management now (9th grade was a disaster) but can still use some improvement. I’ll continue to enforce these ideas.</p>

<p>He does much better in class now, it’s just being able to research outside of his small world and start grasping bigger picture stuff, and understanding how to shape his own direction… This is why I believe a Liberal Arts degree would be great for him.</p>

<p>His reading comprehension does worry me a bit… and I want to work on that with him this summer. I’ll be assigning some of the good books I read in school, and see if he can make progress on them. If not, I will seriously reccommend to him and my parents to seek help.</p>

<p>Mom2collegekids- See above for cost and state. I am thinking a smaller school, because starting off, he will need more individual attention than often offered at a bigger school. He is not mature enough -yet- to avoid being lost in the crowd at a bigger school.</p>

<h2>Whofriend- sounds like a very similar story, thanks.</h2>

<p>In summary - I know he is very capable, which is why I am giving him a push right now. He has some growing up to do, but he’ll get there. I just want to make sure he doesn’t fall off the path. (Hey - he better remember this when I’m too old to take care of myself!)</p>

9

<p>

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<p>How much is “a lot”? The list price of many private and out of state public schools can be $50,000 per year or more.</p>

<p>NJ does have a number of public universities that should be considered by any resident there who is concerned about costs.</p>

<p>Another school to consider is University of Minnesota, Morris, a ~2,000 student public LAC with a relatively low list price (about $22,000 per year, no out-of-state surcharge).</p>

10

<p>You have done a great job helping your brother out (hopefully he appreciates it). I think your list of schools is very good. If you haven’t don’t it already, it may be worth skimming through this list of SAT/ACT optional colleges to see if anything pops out – since his GPA seems a good bit higher than his standardized testing (especially if he can write a good essay/get good recommendations/and has good activities). For example I visited Union with my D this year (she really likes it) and they were pretty clear that if you don’t have close to 1300 CR+M on the SAT you are better off applying SAT optional (and with a 3.6 GPA he could have a decent chance to get it).
[SAT/ACT</a> Optional 4-Year Universities | FairTest](<a href=“http://fairtest.org/university/optional]SAT/ACT”>ACT/SAT Optional List - Fairtest)</p>

11

<p>Also, maybe look into Siena College (upstate NY, close to Union) which is probably a good match school. And Dickinson College and Muhlenberg Collge (both in PA) are really nice small liberal arts school that I beleive are SAT optional. I saw them all with my D this past year.</p>

12

<p>Going to college, as you well know, is a cornucopia of emotions/issues/demands/responsibilities. Its about growing up. Some people are ready and some people are not. Too often, people are caught up in prestige or going because they think they have to. </p>

<p>Its very important that he own the process and selection and the responsibilities once there, so he doesnt waste time, party and bomb. Does he have any issues like ADHD going on? If so, that needs to be addressed asap. </p>

<p>If he is still immature, its okay to take a gap year, work somewhere and get some direction in his life. </p>

<p>For some that is working in a non-profit, for others its the local ice cream shop and for others its the military for 2-3 years. </p>

<p>He should be counseled that he is not you (congrats on your accomplishments) and he must make his own way and that is okay. That is not a permission slip to goof off and blow it. But it is a permission slip to recognize that not going to an Ivy or other reach is perfectly acceptable.</p>

<p>Finally, he should select a college where he will have the best opportunity to succeed, not be overwhelmed and a place where he fits socially. </p>

<p>Otherwise, your advice is solid. Good luck.</p>

13

<p>All - thank you very much for the advice. It is very helpful and all points are valid.</p>

<h2>I will be tweaking the list, and also talking things over with my brother and parents to make some adjustments to the process. (Also, coming up with more budget friendly alternatives.)</h2>

<p>I was much more proactive about education for some reason, and I just don’t think that my parents/brother understood quickly enough. He is doing really well in class now, but it is too late to take the SAT seriously… that time has come and gone.</p>

<p>They must have thought that the admissions process was very easy bc I made it look easy, but I’m not sure that they appreciated all the work that I was putting into everything (or putting in right now) I am not as concerned about my parents, but I hope it does start to click for my brother soon. </p>

<p>I know that he is as capable as I am (I had my flaws too…), and I think the whole college experience will be really good for him. I think he needs to get away from my parents, start making his own decisions, leading his own social life, and start gathering knowledge in academia. </p>

<p>We are not pressuring him to go anywhere… I have suggested that Comm. College and then reapplying might be a good thing. I am, however, offering options that he wouldnt otherwise know that he had.</p>

<p>I also have a week off from work after Christmas, and as long as my parents foot the bill, I’ll be driving him around to different campuses for visits, etc. I’ll also be able to reach out to him a bit more in terms of what he hopes to achieve in college, how to get there, and how to make the most of the opportunity.</p>

<p>I will keep everyone updated on our status… this can serve as a good example for future applicants.</p>

14

<p>Be careful of deadlines – some schools are December 1.</p>

<p>University of Minnesota, Morris is December 15, and has some scholarships:
[University</a> of Minnesota Morris | Admissions](<a href=“http://admissions.morris.umn.edu/]University”>http://admissions.morris.umn.edu/)</p>

15

<p>Your brother’s state of residency will be based on where your PARENTS live.</p>

<p>Just make sure that your parents will spend $50k+ per year on your brother. Just because they’ve done well recently doesn’t necessarily mean that they’re willing to spend $200k+ on your brother’s education. Clarify that with them. They may fear spending that much on your brother with his modest stats.</p>

16

<p>I imagine he will be fine in college. In reality, a 3.6 GPA with an improving trend is not too shabby. Some people are just not great at standardized tests (which the test optional school seem to recognize). Good luck to both of you.</p>