Advice for transfer student who's been told to "get a 'real' job"?

Career Opportunities & Internships
1

<p>Hi,</p>

<p>I just posted a few minutes ago to the board to offer support and empathy to someone in kind of a similar situation. Now I'm asking for advice myself about mine.</p>

<p>I'm 24, going on 25 in August, and will (finally) be ready to transfer to a four-year Liberal Arts degree at a school that just "fits right" for me. I'm looking to go to Emerson College in Boston (not far from where I live, but 'dorm-able'), which has a long (and well-known) track record of getting creative-minded professionals like me a fast track/kick start on their career(s), whatever they may be, in the field of their choice through internships/work study/mentoring etc. Jay Leno went there, Denis Leary, Maria Menounos, and Henry Winkler (heyyyyyy! It's the Fonz!). I haven't had what one would consider a "traditional" road to my upcoming Associate's degree, and that includes the fact that I've always been more geared towards my studies than I have been with, let's say, other pursuits. This includes the old part-time burger-flipping/register-clicking/(insert minimum wage torture method here) gig that most young folks do during or after high school and/or college, and so far I consider myself "fortunate" not to have had to do that.</p>

<p>However, it's not only "fortune" that's precluded me from even making a small (read: picayune) fortune working the day-to-day grind; I've long suffered from what I believe is a strong anxiety disorder in high-pressure scenarios that just don't meet my interests or abilities. I can't do math -- at all -- let alone in my head, and don't work well at a fast pace, so that knocks out about 99% of the jobs that even exist in this crappy economy, most of which involve multitasking and quick calculations. Not only that, but there are customers who don't have the patience for the retard behind the counter to carry the two while the pencil shakes in her hand and the point snaps off. They want their coffee AND their change, and lacking the latter, the former is just bound to get splashed in the incompetent trainee's face. </p>

<p>So I know that retail/service work isn't right for me, but my entire family is insisting (and rather angrily) that if I'm to "prove" myself as being "worthy" of or "ready for" a college education "there" -- and to live away while getting one, for ~$40K to boot -- I'd better get my arse (edited for content) out of the library and get a GD (edited again!) burger job so I can know how to handle "the real world." 1) I know I actually <em>can't</em> do the fast-paced retail/service profession; 2) I'm not willing to forego or defer this opportunity to attend a school of MY choosing and possibly apply for an internship that fits my interests (and will "pay off" more in the long run); 3) once I do attend (although I haven't been accepted there yet), or wherever I go, even if I do get a retail job, it won't be at, say, the local town mall (where nobody actually works, because almost nobody lives here), but at, say, a "niche" type of outlet with even merchandise that I'd have an interest in (i.e. books, art supplies, flowers, etc.), and/or apply for work study and/or internships at the transfer school (because there's zilch in my area except for Mickey D's). I live in a ghost town suburb about 20 miles from Providence, RI, and my family (I've started to use the word 'relatives') want me to attend school close to home so they can 1) "check up on how I'm doing" (read: keep tabs and bother) and 2) "because we're all worried about you" (read: that you won't come home again, to paraphrase Robert Burns). They also want me to get the burger job in-town because "that's what everyone else did, who are you to say you shouldn't, because it's really that you can't...if you can, then just do it, sell the Nike Happy Meal. (With a supersized Kool-Aid to boot.)</p>

<p>I've been to so-called career counselors before, including at my current school, who don't help you get a job (that you might be interested in), but give you a survey to tell you what type you should apply for. One is the famed Myers/Briggs Type Inventory (MBTI), which identified me as being an INFP -- introverted, intuitive, feeling, and perceptive. I'd actually perform horribly at a job that doesn't fit most or all criteria of my interests, my ideals/beliefs, my working style, and my goals. So for interests, obviously it's creativity, natch -- the term "sandwich 'artist'" at Subway isn't exactly what I'm looking for. Ideals/beliefs -- I won't work burger joints, because I'm a vegetarian, and refuse to promote the purchase/consumption of animal products (so that knocks the local Stop & Shop out too), and won't do Wal-Mart, because I'm opposed to their labor practices (and would probably get fired anyway for going all Norma Rae on their stupid lying smiley face). I won't be a secretary because I'm aware of the image that it gives women, and I'd again get fired for not sucking up (in more ways than one) to the boss MAN. I won't work for Geek Squad, although I seem to have a natural knack for computers, because in general, globally, worldwide, I'm opposed to the prevalence/dependence of our society on so-called "social networks" that really spread us further apart. Also, I don't feel comfortable selling a Google phone when I'm ideologically opposed to how cowardly they've been regarding the communications lockdown in repressive regimes such as China and the Middle East.</p>

<p>Working style -- I work best when given a project and asked to come up with a solution myself (again, a creative solution). That doesn't mean I'm not a team player, it just means that I really ascribe to the old adage "if you want something done right, better do it yourself." I'd certainly ask for input, feedback, and commentary, and will give credit where credit is due, but for the process approach and the final product, I'd need "creative control" at my own pace, with my own hours, and my own way of doing things. Otherwise it'll just come out a total mess. Goals, well, I think the mere fact that I have some means I won't ever be content with $7.50/hr while the world just passes me by. While the J.K. Rowlings of the world, the Gateses, the Zuckerbergs, the 21st-century Picassos and Spielbergs go to school to study innovative ways of putting their ideas into motion. While I ask those future innovators, one of which I could have become, "you want fries with that?"</p>

<p>By no means am I putting down the 16-year-old fry kids who get their initial start at these places (although it does kind of sound like I am...and maybe I am a little bit, sorry). I'm just saying, it's not for me; I've got an opportunity, I refuse to pass it up -- and I refuse to postpone it just because I'm a "late bloomer" in life. It'd just be a way of further delaying the eventual bloom, by serving up a Bloomin' Onion and begging for tips to jingle in my empty kangaroo pockets.</p>

<p>The question is, how the bloomin' onion am I supposed to pay for a ~$40K education myself without taking out student loans -- because I probably won't be able RIGHT AWAY to get a job and pay them back (did you know President Obama JUST RECENTLY finished paying off his)? Scholarships are iffy -- it's a gamble any way you look at it, even though I've got a 3.84 GPA and membership in Phi Theta Kappa, and have applied for several, obviously I'm not alone in my application. I won't kowtow to the establishment (there's my '60s Intuitive Idealism coming through...and I wasn't born until 1986!) who, for right now, is supposed to pay for it; or go to a state school (no knocks against it, but the program at Emerson is just so..."right"), and get the tuition discount (and the in-state fee waiver for CC transfer students) but their programs are just too vague and generalized, and really "too close for comfort," I don't want to be SOL ('Yandex' it if you're not sure...American commie here who won't use Google), and I don't want to be the textbook case of "A Dream Deferred" (go IxQuick Langston Hughes' poem), because now's my chance, now's my dream, and I don't want my nobler aspirations to become a coulda-woulda-shoulda nightmare on Stepford Street!</p>

2

<p>I work in a grocery store deli and recently we had a new operations manager come in to the store. She kept trying to get on us about stuff we were doing in the deli department and it was clear to me she had no idea what it was actually like to work in the deli. So I went up to her and asked her if she had ever had ANY type of experience working in a deli before and her answer was no. She lost all credibility with me right there and will never fully gain it back.</p>

<p>I agree with your family. Every General has done some time in the trenches before moving up. You don’t have to work at McDonald’s. Just get some actual work experience as a front-line employee, in any industry of your choosing, before you try to be a big shot.</p>

3

<p>Are you serious?</p>

<p>I had no idea people this stuck up are living on American soil.</p>

<p>“I won’t work burger joints, because I’m a vegetarian, and refuse to promote the purchase/consumption of animal products (so that knocks the local Stop & Shop out too)”
-Get over it…Its a job, stop taking flipping burgers so seriously. </p>

<p>“won’t do Wal-Mart, because I’m opposed to their labor practices”
-Why are their labor practices so bad?
Is it the fact that they arnt unionizing the workers?</p>

<p>“I won’t be a secretary because I’m aware of the image that it gives women, and I’d again get fired for not sucking up (in more ways than one) to the boss MAN.”</p>

<p>-Get off your high horse and stop using dumb arguments to not work somewhere.
Working as a secretary is a perfectly fine job for a women, most men would not want the job because they associate that kind of a job for women. You do realize that companies would not be able to operate without secretaries? Support positions are extremely important to our world. You also do realize there are also very powerful women that do jobs better than men do, and powerful men that do a better job than women?
Typically a male 200 lb 6’3" iron worker who has to haul 100 lbs of steel to his job sight daily will do a better job than a 5’5" 110lb women.
And a cute 5’5” 110lb women will do a better job with talking with people and being personable than a 200lb 6’3” war veteran.<br>
But I digress. </p>

<p>"I won’t work for Geek Squad, although I seem to have a natural knack for computers, because in general, globally, worldwide, I’m opposed to the prevalence/dependence of our society on so-called “social networks” that really spread us further apart. "</p>

<p>-HAHA really?? Thats what Geek Squad does, they fix computers so us people can go back to “depending on social networks that spread us further apart”
No …what Geek Squad does is help out people who have no idea how to use a computer or set up their sound system. The job has nothing to do with social networking. They are electronic savy people who make a living helping people. </p>

<p>Also, I don’t feel comfortable selling a Google phone when I’m ideologically opposed to how cowardly they’ve been regarding the communications lockdown in repressive regimes such as China and the Middle East.
…really? Just re-read this and think about what you just said.</p>

<p>You do realize that California is constantly battling with foreigners coming from Mexico. People who have lost their jobs and are willing to work for pennies just to be able to feed their families. And you sit here and whine about all these ideologies and beliefs you have that cause you to not work somewhere? </p>

<p>Do you think you are entitled to a better job or something? Who do you think you are?</p>

<p>God have mercy on your soul.</p>

4

<p>Cherry, you need to change your attitude completely before you can find success. Think of yourself as a young mother with no skill but a child to feed. What are your choices under those circumstances. You will have to do any work that is available to you to survive. Your ideal will not bring food to the table. Your family has your best interest in their heart to insist that you find a “real” job. I worked as a janitor while in college many years ago. Its dirty work but in my mind it is noble because I can help finance my college education that way. May be you can too.</p>

5

<p>I kind of like your worldview.</p>

<p>There are probably going to be a lot of criticisms of your post, the only reason I say that is because I get a lot of criticism, and it’s because I am almost the exact situation as you are.</p>

<p>If you’re like me, you’re different, and you don’t want someone screaming at you “Get a job! Get a job!” like a broken record. Outside pressure saying “You won’t be able to find a job unless you major in math and engineering!”. Or maybe that you’re incentives are different from other peoples’…that doing a highly systematized and robotic job is just not going to keep you happy.</p>

<p>I don’t know if you can see this, but take a look at my personality results- [Your</a> Big Five Results](<a href=“Your Big Five Results”>Your Big Five Results)</p>

<p>What that says is that I am very smart, but other than that I am useless for most normal, everyday conditions and situations.</p>

<p>So my advice to you would be to do what I am doing- take it easy and go with the flow. Don’t put too much reliance on school or your job. Try to change things up every once and a while, and it isn’t “bad” to skip around from one job to another, whatever someone else might tell you. And maybe, just maybe, you will get a break and be able to find a niche that enables you to fulfill your potential and be truly creative. The odds are against it, but that should be your goal.</p>

<p>Btw, I am really hungry for a bloomin onion.</p>

6

<p>You told us a lot about what you can’t do and what you won’t do and what everyone else wants you to do, but unless I missed something in that wicked long post, you have yet to tell us what you want to do, aside from going to this school.</p>

<p>Fine. Go to school. If your family doesn’t have the money to send you and you don’t get any scholarships and you aren’t working your way through, you’re going to need financial aid. Chances are a lot of that will be made up of loans. That’s a reality for a lot of college students and college graduates.</p>

<p>Eventually, though, you’re going to have to support yourself. If you don’t care about what your family thinks, than do whatever you want to do. It doesn’t matter if you work at the same place all your life or even in the same field. But you need to at least begin thinking about the sorts of fields you’re interested in. You mentioned internships–they come into play here. You might consider shadowing people, too. That would give you a decent grasp on a broader range of job opportunities. </p>

<p>One more thing: You’re tossing around a lot of ideologies. I have a feeling those ideologies are going to really cripple your employment prospects. Getting a job is difficult right now. Crossing off opportunities left and right because this one might require secretarial work and that one might need you to do some math and that one might involve social networks or meat or whatever is going to limit your options.</p>

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<p>It’s a myth that you have to start in ****ty underpaid corporate retail/fast food jobs. Never worked a day in my life in either of them. I worked for a software company owned by a friend at their sales booth at MacWorld Expo one weekend a year for about 5 years. That’s the sum total of my retail experience.</p>

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<p>you’re almost 25, are about to transfer to a 4-year school, and still have never even had a job? what have you been doing the last 8 years or so? you’re parents are right, you’re living in a dream world with no sense of reality, i’m sure a little “grunt” work would give you a better perspective of how life really is for the better part of our society</p>

9

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<p>sounds like your interests or abilities don’t include getting a job.</p>

<p>unfortunate. change your attitude or you will forever be a drain on society.</p>

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<p>No offense, but when you are the new person in the office, why would you think that you are the one who is going to do things the right way by doing it yourself?</p>

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<p>You want a job where you are the new person and they let you choose your own hours? Why should a job let you work at your pace? Do you realize that things need to get done? If meeting X is happening on Wednesday, are you going to tell your boss that you really need until Friday to finish your project that is relevant to the meeting, and oh btw, you won’t work Tuesday because Tuesdays are your personal time, and your boss must accept this because you work at your own pace?</p>

<p>The world doesn’t function on Cherry time, sorry to say.</p>

<p>You say you can’t do retail because it is fast paced… are you aware that many offices operate in a fast paced environment on tight schedules?</p>

<p>I don’t know what world you are living in, but it is not the same world as the rest of us.</p>

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<p>“If you want something done right, do it yourself” only works if you’re Gates or Picasso. I don’t want to be an ass and say “you’re probably not as talented” but you do need to reflect on whether your disinclination to work with others is a flaw rather than a quirk of your personality. So many things in life, not just jobs, requires an ability for teamwork, and not the “input, advice, and review” that you consider teamwork. This is a major red flag.</p>

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<p>I was also a little unsure about this hostility toward your family. Granted, I don’t know anything about your situation and I apologize for making assumptions. Am I right in assuming you’ve been living at home since age 18 and the “fortune” to not have to work part-time jobs is another way of saying your parents pay for you? If that is the case, I would reconsider this hostility toward their wanting you to account for yourself. If you didn’t have them, you would have to choose between your ideological views about retail and starving to death. </p>

<p>If, growing up, I had told my parents that I don’t want to work at fast-food because I dislike the beef industry’s treatment of animals, they would have laughed at me. We lived under the income poverty line; we got whatever jobs we needed to put food on the table, myself included.</p>

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<p>I love your all of your replies.
I may of come off a little to hostile and harsh, but she needs a wake up call.</p>

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<p>I think it’s alright to be picky about what job you want if you’ve prove yourself. If you’ve worked your butt of at school and built a portfolio of experiences, then I think it’s OK to take some time to evaluate what opportunities are out there for you to choose from before making that ultimate decision. HOWEVER, you have not proven yourself, therefore you don’t really have the luxury to eliminate every opportunity because “you’re too good for those.” If you believe you’re “fortunate” because you haven’t worked for anything in your life, then I believe you don’t deserve to pick and choose what you want to do, or to disregard your family’s advice. </p>

<p>Plus, I can’t figure out how you know so much about how you’ll act or be around these different scenarios when you haven’t actually experienced them. You think you know what working in retail or offices is like and how you’ll react to the “high-pressure” situations, but you have no experience to prove it. Figure that out before you assume anything. For all you know, certain jobs that you are excluding might be just right.</p>

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<p>I’m just going to assume that Cherry31416 is being a ■■■■■, and does not actually want anything more than to ■■■■■ this forum in the posting of the aforementioned message.</p>