@mom2and, a funny aside. Last year the early rounds of the basketball playoffs were held at my son’s (all boys) school. My daughter, who is part of the theater troupe there, was extremely annoyed because that meant that the stage could not be used for an additional week, which somewhat affected the preparations for the spring play. She even sent a note to the principal asking why the basketball games couldn’t be housed in the auxiliary gym. The fact that the auxiliary gym has neither stands nor a scoreboard didn’t seem to phase her at all.
@saillakeerie , yes, it does come down to that, and it will be that way forevermore in the US. But OP gets to the heart of the problem. I am grossly over-generalizing and stereotyping, but our society clearly idolizes those who don’t need their brains to be rich and famous. Most parents grumble about budget cuts, teachers, you name it, but if we paid our teachers a good salary to begin with, we would probably see higher quality teachers and teaching, and an elevation in status of teachers. Finland is an obvious example. They don’t choose just the smartest to become teachers, but those who clearly demonstrate qualities deemed essential to being a good teacher. Teaching is a very desirable and well-paid job there. And it is no coincidence that Finland has pretty much the highest educational standards in the world, so they must be doing something right.
Meanwhile, here in our sports-obsessed school district about an hour from NYC, the district needs to shave a million dollars off the budget. No one discussed perhaps getting rid of the overpaid athletics director. Instead, the district decided getting rid of the head of the guidance department for the whole district, (who is paid far less than aforementioned atheltics director), would be a good idea. Luckily the sane people of the community raised a ruckus and that is no longer happening. Why can’t the coaches organize their own sports? Why is there an athletic director at all? Sorry for going off topic, but it is clear that most of American society does not prioritize learning and that is at the heart of the problem.
Regarding C students, the article is really silly, IMO. I think some C students are lazy, but so are some A and B students. I think for a lot of C students, much of it comes down to individual leaning styles. Not every kid can learn as the other 75% of kids in the class do.
Most HS classmates and felt there was far more excitement and drama following our HS Debate and Math team competitions and Westinghouse projects of classmates who were selected as Semi-Finalists/Finalists than following the exploits of our athletic teams.
In fact, one common complaint many HS athlete classmates even in sports popular in the American mainstream like basketball, football, and baseball is that most classmates aren’t interested in their efforts and that they are treated in the same dismissive manner that student peers, parents, and even school admins/teachders in more mainstream US high schools…especially those obsessed/crazed with sports would usually reserve for the above-average academic achievers(a.k.a. “Nerds”).
Seems like the author himself fulfills the negative stereotypes many HS classmates have of marketing/sales/communications folks as using highly developed social and salesmanship skills to compensate for lack of actual substance. Much of his website and article seems to be a big marketing campaign to sell his book and “unconventional ideas*”.
- In reality, not very original as many American pundits of the anti-intellectual variety have been saying the same things lionizing C students over A and B students for more than a century.
A recent past president even gave a speech at his alma mater touting himself as a good example of how far C students can go…while neglecting to mention how his being born into a family with wealth and strong connections meant he was portraying himself as someone who hit a triple when he was really already born on third base…
Seems to me (at least from what I have seen, heard from other parents and read), this is the exception rather than the rule.
Maybe I’m just cranky today, but this sounds like a variation of the “working mom/stay at home mom” debate, which really shouldn’t be a debate at all, but rather, do what is necessary and best for your family and no need to judge those who make different decisions or have different constraints.
Of course, it sounds tactless and tone-deaf of the principal to celebrate the athletes at an event designed to recognize students for their academic accomplishments. And sure, we should ask whether professional athletes should really make a gazillion times more than public school teachers. But should highly accomplished lawyers, or doctors, or other individuals who have dedicated themselves to their career and have a specialty that makes them especially desirable, also make mega bucks, when public defenders or general practitioners don’t? It doesn’t seem right, but then again, our economic system rewards high achieving specialists, across a range of fields.
I have a child who is a high achieving athlete, who is also very active in music. In season, he often has weeks of 30+ hours of sport and music commitments, not taking into account the actual time spent being in school or doing homework. He has been playing his sport since before Kindergarten and his instrument since elementary school, and he gads worked hard at those because he loves them. Although he is in the most rigorous curriculum in his high school, he isn’t valedictorian, so he doesn’t get academic recognition. And his team didn’t make it deep in the state tournament, so he didn’t get much attention. And the folks at his games are the parents of his teammates. No crowds or ticker tape parades or newspaper coverage for sports there.
Sure, I get tired of his friends’ parents doing the FB “humble brag” about their kids winning yet another competition, academic or athletic, or getting recognized for one more accomplishment. I look at my unappreciated kid, who excels but isn’t the number one best at any of them. He does what he does because he loves it, he can’t imagine spending his time any other way (though occasionally, he might trade some of it for more sleep).
At the end of the day, we can vent about about frustration with irritating people, like the principal who decided to recognize a different set of students. But recognition that most kids are trying their hardest to do their best, in whatever field(s) that may be, just seems appropriate.
@Midwestmomofboys very well said…but the hours being spent on field or band room or wherever are rewarded in ECs for that child. Have a child that played AND got decent grades, and he will always win out over a kid who tutors and makes a little higher grade. I guess in a way it’s like we need to congratulate the jock to say…“wow, you got good grades and you play sports???” whoa. I think it’s insulting in a rather odd way. Like the working mom/stay at home mom. Great mom who stays at home…fantastic! Working mom who does great at home…you must be superwoman b/c you supposedly do both. Never mind that it takes discipline to do the former one, too. 
All in all…several posters hit it right on the head when they say it’s all about perspective. My view is tainted b/c of where I stand. I think the athletes get a lot of passes with assignments, discipline, etc. Honors kids are always threatened that they will be less appealing if they do anything wrong. Which they are scared to death to have anything that might thwart that NMF status. Idk…ramblings of a mom who got an article from someone after they heard my kid did a phenomenal job on a standardized test. sour grapes maybe…but I am a little tired of just being quiet.
I don’t think that being on the varsity basketball team is any more of an EC “hook” than being in the school orchestra. I think the relevant question, if we are talking about how kids are viewed, is how is being one of the top 1 or 2% (about the percentage of high school football and basketball players who compete in Div 1) of high school violin players in the country viewed compared to being a recruited athlete? Might as well compare apples to apples.
Get quiet satisfaction from knowing you are doing the right thing. Why you all pay attention to sports your kid doesn’t participate in is beyond me. Let the winning run or dramatic catch of the ball or whatever be like the proverbial tree in the forest - let it fall without making a sound.
I agree with the notion of letting it fall without making a sound. But why believe you are doing the right thing? Really you are just doing a different thing.
@kikidee9 I am very sympathetic to the reaction against parenting as a competitive activity. Especially as we get closer to the feeding frenzy of college acceptances coming out at my kid’s high school, I get worn out by the endless humble brags about "how fortunate my dear child so is to have the opportunity to do . . . . . ", the parents’ way of saying, look at my amazing offspring. Social media is destructive like that. The old days, when a kid’s family showed up for the awards assembly, music performance, or sporting event, and then may have gone out for ice cream to celebrate afterwards, often, truly seem like “the good old days.” Nowadays, with far-flung families plus parenting perpetual one-upmanship – much of it is instead spread on social media, in all its awkward glory.
We all have our breaking points, and I certainly am sympathetic to yours.
Why does this annoy you? It is a lot of work to be a star athlete. Those who put in that much time and still make the high honor role are amazing.
When my oldest was in high school he was a three sport athlete AND in the top 5% of his graduating class. What annoyed me was teachers asking him “are you sure you belong in this class?” because he was an athlete.
In past years, our school had an outspoken group of stereotypical jocks. They were cliquish, demeaning towards the academically-minded, and took a strange pleasure in picking on a hardworking kid (a.k.a. “nerd”) and excluding him/her whenever possible (schoolyard soccer games, group projects in class, class trips…you name it). They’d settle on a new mark every few months, and in our small grade of 80-90 students, many - myself included - have some bad experiences courtesy of that small group.
In recent years, as the clique turned its attention to drugs and alcohol, they were spared discipline and lavished with praise because they formed the core of several sports teams. As a result, the average GPA among that group is on the low end of the 2-3 range.
With college applications over and the prospect of schools that offer few options looming, a lot of these students are now finding that the adulation they enjoyed in the past does them little good. One or two are smarter than the others, more thoughtful than you’d expect a “dumb jock” to be, and people I used to count as friends. They’ll be attending colleges that don’t measure up to their abilities. Many of their peers are facing the possibility of worse standard of living than their parents,’ and one confided to me just last week that his life was “a shambles.”
I think this is all very sad. I don’t begrudge them the attention they received in high school. I feel sorry for them, because those who suggested that academics were optional failed these kids. When the coach praised them for every goal, and their parents celebrated every win, while turning a blind eye to issues at school, these adults closed a lot of doors for young men who weren’t ready to make such decisions. They had four years as “good soccer players,” and four years as “star athletes.” Now, they’ll feature in classmates’ lectures on hard work for forty years. No doubt they’ll face snide remarks for a long time, as the gulf between our school’s top students and the bottom-feeders has visible effects on career prospects, income, and status. Top students get recognition at every stage of life after high school, and “dumb jocks” are eventually left with nothing but others’ pity. There’s little to envy in that predicament.
Geez, who are the adults in all these schools giving athletes a pass on discipline and deadlines? Maintaining eligibility to compete requires a 3.0 and attendance at study tables.
Definitely doesn’t happen at my kid’s public school where, actually, the obnoxious ones getting the “free pass,” bullying and spreading rumors about regular kids, are the top achieving academic kids. Parental-push back on the Valedictorian being suspended for day-drinking wouldn’t be something most administrators want to endure, so sometimes it has been pushed under the rug.
Can your smart kid do this:
^^ Saw that on the news today- he makes it look so easy!
OP, as you can see there’s another side to think about. At the end of the day, I don’t care what others think- I always celebrate and am happy for my friend’s children. I live in a great community- people generally seem happy for one another. Accomplishments of all sorts are acknowledged and celebrated. Meanwhile, my D1 athlete ( recently signed ) just left to go coach a basketball team of 10 year olds who have challenges. Loves doing it- highlight of his week. He’s a great kid, a really good person - I like who he has become. So glad he doesn’t read CC.
Why do people want their children to go to the Ivy league if they aren’t interested in athletics? Being a Rhodes scholar requires athletic participation.
Many high schools publish the grand total of scholarships earned by the graduating class. I’ve never seen it broken down by athletic vs academic, but I think most people think it is all academic, and probably most of it is. There are some very good athletic scholarships, but most are pretty small compared to the $20k merit awards so often posted here.
Where in the blog did it mention that the C students were athletes?
Sounds like a lot of jealousy to me. Being so angry and buying into the dumb jock stereotype for all athletes says a lot about one’s intellectual level. Kids that focus only on academics can be very one dimensional, frankly they should do well since that is the only thing they spend their time doing. Bravo to the athletes that are also great students - and there are a lot of them.
@austinmshauri I am putting my own taint on the article I guess. We are a family that will get no need based scholarships…and I am hearing about kids who didn’t even try in school but are athletically good get full tuition and more. Plus, there GPA doesn’t have to be as high to keep it. Judge me if you will. I have been real about my feelings and know there are great athletes who are star students and deserve all and more. My problem is the C athlete that gets more money than academic kids for college. By the article itself…it was saying that they are more likely to be successful. I guess I need to rethink that definition. I was venting…over people being passive aggressive about my own kid. Thanks for talking me down. I just get tired of these parades and special recognitions for only certain subgroups…I just think that “nerdy” kids keep getting the short end b/c they are seen as not needing the affirmation. I love hearing about how standardized tests, GPAs, and APs/IBs shouldn’t even be the real indicator for college. I start hearing well rounded…and the kids should be more average with lots of ECs…and that an athlete knows discipline. Just gets me irritated. (that is the end of my rant).
@Proudpatriot It irked me b/c they were there for 4.0 averages. To then make a subset and say these kids are even more special b/c they happen to be on a middle school team is outrageous. They had already been on the morning announcements…they get to wear special clothes to say they are on a team…they have pep rallies to make sure they are promoted…there scores and leading individuals are tweeted about not just by the school…but the athletic director…teachers and what not about what a great job the team had done. In fact, the mantra for the school is “greatness and power are mine”. They define it (by what is advertised and attention given) to the athletes. Could they not give these kids (and the athletes that were there) just a moment without hijacking it? that’s all.