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<p>Hi Everyone
My DD is attending Iowa State in the Fall. She did not get her desired housing assignment (or the next 8 alternatives) and ended up being placed in one of the only all girl dorms on campus.</p>
<p>My question is: How different will her social experience be based on this? </p>
<p>She is the type of girl who really does seem to relate to guys. Her two best friends are guys. She does have a couple of good girl friends, she is just careful in choosing them, as she has been burned w/ gossip. She does not do gossip or drama…in fact she avoids it at all costs. She loves sports and can converse strongly on college football and basketball. (yah, I keep telling her that she is going to make some guy very happy!) LOL </p>
<p>Pluses of the all girl dorm: Closest to the building that her major classes will be in. Newly remodeled dining center attached. Told that there is less vandalism, and less ummm vomit in the bathrooms from kids who partake to much.</p>
<p>Minuses: Seems to be a smaller building…maybe 125 girls vs huge complex’s of 500+ (not sure if this is plus or minus) No guys… </p>
<p>Hmmm as a parent I am definately leaning toward the all girl dorm…but I want her to have a successful year.</p>
<p>I guess I’m just unsure if she will be happy in a smaller complex with all girls…</p>
<p>Does anyone have any input? Any experience?</p>
<p>It depends on how socially involved she is. If she’s going to be involved in other activities and will make friends with people, guys or girls, who don’t live in her dorm, I’d recommend the all-girls dorm. It will be easier to study, less crazy, and safer. If she isn’t very bold and is more hesitant making friends, a larger dorm may be a better atmosphere for her.</p>
<p>I live in a all-girls dorm, because I attend a college only for women. I’m not sure if my situation would apply to yours, but I’ll give my input anyway.</p>
<p>I had a lot of guy friends in high school, and still do to this day. Living with women hasn’t been a problem for me. I’ve found that it’s quiet, clean, and convenient for when I need to borrow a dress/help with hair. When I want guys I go find them, and so can your DD. With gossip, your DD can easily avoid it just by not involving herself in it and choosing the right people to hang out with. Another plus side with this type of housing is that she can have a man-free refuge to come home to. If she ends up dating a guy and they break up, she doesn’t have to worry about seeing him bringing other girls to his room. Another excellent way to avoid drama.</p>
<p>Is her major male dominated like engineering?</p>
<p>I hear from a lot of female engineering students that they really end up wanting a sorority or all girl dorm just to get away from all the guys.</p>
<p>I mean, I’m better with guys myself, and hate drama, but sometimes you just have to talk with girls. I get sick being around guys every day of my life, never thought I would but you do.</p>
<p>Also dorms are just a place to sleep. She’ll be out of it most of the time. And if she has a hard time finding friends that are girls then an all girl dorm provides more opportunity for her to find a non-drama friend.</p>
<p>I was in a coed dorm my first year, and I’ll be in an all-girls dorm next year. Like your daughter, I definitely prefer the company of men, don’t gossip, and I’m pretty tomboyish. I can’t speak to my experiences in the dorm yet, but my friend loved it; she’s a total girly-girl, but does have a lot of male friends and just spent a lot of time with her male friends outside of the dorm. I plan on doing the same thing since I don’t use the dorm to socialize at all. Just remind her that the dorm is primarily a place to sleep, so if she’s bothered by how many girls there are at any point, there are a thousand places outside of there where she can converse with the people she wants to.</p>
<p>I’d do the co-ed dorm. For a freshman, it seems like a much better opportunity to meet a range of people and cultivate a group of friends whereas the all-girls dorm might be quieter and more limiting in this respect.</p>
<p>There will still be some guys hanging out in the all-girls dorm (unless the dorm policy says otherwise) especially if there is a cafeteria in the all-girls dorm. However if possible I’d go with the coed dorm especially if that is where your daughter plans on making many of her friends. For me, I found a large majority of my friends in the dorm in which I live. It may make it a bit more challenging for your daughter to live in a all-girls dorm (especially since it is smaller) if that is what your daughter is planning to do. However, if she makes friends extremely easily and plans on looking to clubs or classes for friends (not the dorm) the all-girls dorm might be an okay choice.</p>
<p>I have never had female friends, except for the neighbor girl who I have been close with since preschool. Even in preschool all my friends were guys. I lived in a large co-ed dorm my first year, and opted for the small all girls dorm my second year. The all girls dorm is, in some ways, more conservative. That was not something I ever imagined I would want until I lived in the coed dorm, where anything goes and it seems there are no social rules whatsoever-- eventually I was pining for a more conservative atmosphere just to be around more mature people. The madness becomes tiresome after a while, no matter how liberal you think you are. The smaller dorm has a much higher sense of community. Everybody knows everybody and people are nicer. There is some catty girl drama but not anywhere near as much as you’d think-- we know we’re stuck together after all, and we don’t have the refuge of male social common sense like in a coed dorm. My experience was that the coed dorm was MUCH more catty and gossipy. There is a large group of girls that go out to the frat parties together on weekends. Anyone can go along. There are also a lot of girls who stay home. Because everybody pretty much knows everybody, you’re free to do whatever you want with whomever and there is always someone to hang out with. In the large co-ed dorm, I felt alone in a crowd.</p>
<p>And frankly, things just smell better without so many boys around. XD </p>
<p>Either situation likely holds the potential to be completely awesome for your D, if she chooses to make the best of it.</p>
<p>Well, the way my dorm works, the girls had one floor to themselves while the guys had the rest of the dorm (there were loads of other all - female dorms as well, but I did not and do not plan on living in them).</p>
<p>My experience was mostly good - there was the occasional screaming like banshees - but I had, for the most part a bunch of girls who were totally willing to help me with everything and became good friends. I’m not sure I would’ve gotten that if I were living in a totally co -ed dorm.</p>
<p>in the uni that I attend, the all girls dorm is very quiet and antisocial. All of the girls there that chose to live there are a little… weird. I suggest going co ed.</p>