Am I setting myself up for failure? I am feeling very insecure.

College Majors Science Majors
1

I am in my 3rd year at a community college due to the fact that I CANNOT make up me effin mind, it’s literally embarrassing for me and it’s sucking the life out of me. Sorry to say it but college to me is what I have been waiting for and it’s so pathetic that I hadn’t made up my mind a long time ago. Enough venting for now, this is my dilemma:

I have this “thing” for engineering. I don’t know why but it turns me on, I get excited, I took the intro course and let’s just say for an odd reason I am just more comfortable, I feel like the department is just so diverse and sectioned off. I was a business major and I just felt really uncomfortable dealing with people. I am an only child, I’ve had social issues for a long time even as a kid my dad would have to go out and make friends for me LOL it is so silly to say but hey it’s the truth. I get easily embarrassed I’m also very shy but underneath all that shyness is a someone way way different. I had social issues so bad that people actually think Im “stupid” because i talk really low and when i do talk loud i stutter a lot, i use vague words I sat with the special ed kids in middle school because i was just rejected. Some people think I have issues. But in my brain I am very clear and I feel like I’m always plotting. When people read my writing they cannot believe it’s me because its written very well. (Excuse this because i am somewhat venting and not caring). Even my social media profiles, people think I am really popular even though I am not looking for that impression. I just attract way more people online because i just feel better, because I can organize then output, than freezing up and then output becomes gibberish and weird squeaky voice. I’m a black guy so that is just weird for some people (to have that voice). When I am confident I attract A LOT of people, but I only can be confident for like a half hour before i want to flee. I took spanish and i hated it because there was so much social interaction, I failed a test and ended up running to my car crying, I was just so embarrassed, Because of this social wall i feel like a career in business will have me feel uncomfortable since i am always out in public.

The engineering career i feel makes me more excited. I see myself working with others but exactly with the public. The students in engineering seem to fit me more. I feel better with them. The only thing that is making feel insecure is the fact that 1) math is not my strong suit as of now and 2) i have not took any sciences courses EVER in the past besides high school chemistry. (I went to a technical high school). I am very concerned that I will be lost because of that. My intro course i was totally lost and wanted to cry. I knew nothing, my professor was talking as if I knew all this previous stuff. I know nothing about vectors, circuit boards etc. These words really excite me but i do not know anything. My counselor told me that, that into course is a little of everything but I don’t know, all the other students had high school credits for engineering and I feel old and dumb. (Im 20)

What can I do. I feel like if i am disciplined in my studies, I should be fine. But it seems like theres a whole just world of data that i wasn’t exposed to that happens to be vital for this field. My life is just a confused puzzle, I feel like crying. I want to feel free, i want my old life back before i started college and just became so lost.

2

I suggest taking such science and math courses at the community college that you are adequately prepared for and see how it goes. I wouldn’t yet fixate on an engineering degree, as the level of difficulty of that is high, and there are technical lines of work less challenging such as managing computer systems.

3

You definitely need to see if you can handle Calculus and Calculus-based physics and that is best done in your Community College. Don’t worry about having been at the CC for 3 years or more or the fact that you are 20 years old now. You need to settle on a major before you transfer to a 4-year school and it will take as long as it takes. Think of it this way. Getting a B.S. in Engineering is a launchpad for a career which can extend for the rest of your life. So what if you finish your degree a couple of years later than those you graduated from High School with? The important thing is to find the right path for your studies.

4

Advice above is good.

I just want to say…a lot of students get really excited about certain majors or careers before they know anything about them. It makes me wonder: what is it about engineering that’s so attractive to you if you’ve never taken a science class and you aren’t great at math? I think you like the idea of engineering - which is totally fine, exploration is what college is for. But I also think you should dial it back a little and consider all of your options, and really review what it is about engineering you like.

Listening to your post, what seems to attract you is more the social atmosphere and vibe of the engineering department. You say you feel more comfortable; you have social anxiety, and you perceive engineering being a career in which you might interact with people less; you like the students better in the engineering major. None of those things has anything to do with engineering as a career field in and of itself. Moreover, there are lots of other careers that are more solitary and less public - even within business. For example, there’s accounting - accountants do interact with people sometimes (every person in every job does) but a lot of the work is solitary. On the flip, there’s technical writing; a lot of technical writing can be very solitary.

I’m not saying that you shouldn’t try out engineering or do it. You can get better at math with practice, and you may really fall in love with science. But I’m saying that you should think about whether the characteristics you want are characteristics you can find in other careers, too.