My daughters were accepted to the same terrific LAC. One is definitely going (ED) and one is considering it. Anyone have any experience with this? I honestly didn’t think my second daughter was going to want this school, but now that she got in she seems pretty interested.
Identical or fraternal?
I knew of a few sets of twins when I went to that same small LAC years ago. They were able to establish their own lives, but definitely enjoyed having their twin around. Although it’s a small school, I believe they can definitely avoid each other if they want to.
I think it really would depend on what the twins want and what their relationship is. My D is at a LAC and knows a set of identical twins who are both in her class there. It doesn’t seem to be an issue. They are close, but they have also branched out and done their own thing. My D knows one of the twins from her sorority (only one twin joined) and she knows the other twin from classes. The twins also took different semesters abroad so they were apart in terms of school for a year but I don’t know if that was by accident or design.
This is such a personal decision. I can relate one story of twins I know. Twin #1 selected her college and wanted to go there without twin #2. Twin #2 wanted to go WITH twin #1, despite the objections of twin #1. The parents allowed twin #2 to attend. Twin #1 wasn’t happy about it but accepted it. Then they both rushed the same sorority. One got in, and one did not. It turned out so badly that they both ended up transferring (to different schools).
Thanks – they’re fraternal, and I think they look pretty different, but you can tell they’re siblings.
Although they’re close, I think D1 would like her own space, but we don’t feel it’s fair to keep D2 from going, and I’m wondering if it would be okay as long as boundaries were established, e.g. not rooming together (or in the same dorm even). There are about 2300 students at the school and they wouldn’t be majoring in the same thing, but I can see them possibly ending up in a few of the same core classes, which would be okay.
@happy1 That’s interesting about alternating semesters abroad. Good thing to consider.
@brantly No sororities at this school, as it’s all women, and it’s known for not fostering a competitive atmosphere. I actually see them being interested in completely different things unless there’s a club for lovers of Dr Who, Orphan Black, or sushi 
Thank you all. We will have to see how this unfolds.
I have two who are not twins but the same age. Of course they went to the same high school (although not the same middle school), and had very different interests and different friends. In fact, some teachers and classmates didn’t know they were sisters. (I also had twins in my high school class and I didn’t know they were twins or even sisters; I assumed they were cousins, which was very common in our town, as they had nothing in common and were fraternal twins).
They didn’t want to go to the same college, but I don’t think it would have been an issue if they had. I assume they would have formed their own groups of friends and shared a ride home for holidays.
If one doesn’t want to be in the same college as the other, doesn’t that position deserve similar respect?
If one daughter has gotten into a good college, I think the second daughter wanting to go to the same good college trumps the other not wanting her to be there.
I don’t think it is the same thing. Each gets to choose from all the colleges in the world, and doesn’t get to call dibs on any one college. The one twin did apply ED and so is locked into that school, but she shouldn’t be able to prevent her sister from going there too.
It will be a non issue if they both decide to go there.
It seems fine at MIT:
http://news.mit.edu/2001/commtwins-0606
http://mitadmissions.org/blogs/entry/introducing_the_class_of_2013_4
http://campuseye.ug/meet-twins-kato-and-kakuru-ugandas-brightest-mit-graduates/
^^^^^MIT has well over 10,000 students so it is a different situation than a 2400 student LAC. This is a case where the size of the school should be a factor in the decision.
Post 7: as a mother of twins, no, I don’t think one twin (or sibling) not wanting the other to attend the same school is a position worthy of much respect. They don’t get to “block” their twin. That’s not how it works.
There are certainly a lot of twins (or siblings) who want to go to the same school or just do because it is the local school or the flagship and that’s where ‘everyone’ goes. My daughter’s boyfriend has a brother starting at their school next year and they are excited to play on the same team.
Again, they went to the same high school, didn’t they?
They did go to the same high school, which is actually the same size as this college. They’ve shared a lot of friends, classes, etc, even a bedroom, and it’s worked out well. They’ve also had their own lives from the standpoint of different sports and activities, so there’s that.
I do totally respect D1 for wanting to have space for the first time in her life, but part of the risk of applying ED to a school was the possibility of this happening. Neither she nor I thought it was a large possibility, but we’ve been surprised. And D1 is being totally awesome and supportive of whatever D2 chooses, she’s just secretly (to me) worried that she won’t have an opportunity to be independent.
I actually feel that with a bit of planning it will be completely fine, but it’s really helpful to hear stories from people who’ve been through this. I’ve learned that the college process throws you things you haven’t even considered.
The dorms at that school are spread throughout campus. You can request that they be on opposite ends if that’s what they want. I honestly believe that they can have separate lives if they choose to. It is a wonderful place, I hope that your D1 loves it, and that they both do should they both end up there.
Even a small college is different from HS in that there are more courses to choose from, even if in same major. I would think for lots of subjects it would be fairly easy to avoid one another. Wouldn’t prevent D2 from going but might give D1 first choice of dorm and make D2 choose something else unless there’s only one good one. I will say that small schools are easy to work with. My D1’s school wouldn’t even put students from same town together freshman year - wanted them to branch out. I can see that it would have been easy to talk to them about place two Ds as far apart as possible. Hopefully maybe same for you.
Many great dorm choices at that school, fortunately! I doubt they get to pick exactly which one, but they can definitely choose to not be in the same one.
Thank you, everyone! I really do think it will all be fine, I’m just trying to get lots of perspectives as I’m just the mom and can’t really understand what it’s like to be a twin no matter how hard I try.
@pheebers Curious to hear if your D is still interested in the ED school that deferred her. Has her opinion changed?